Forever and ever 2. The adventure starts now.

Part 15

I had taken Paddy to his room to talk to him in peace. With his nike bag thrown in front of the door, he started breaking down in my arms. Let it out, everything. The pain, the anger, the disappointment and fear... just everything. While I ran my palm over his messy hair and hoped it would help.
"It's okay." I whispered every now and then, but knew it wouldn't be. Whatever was going on with him, it was something bigger because watching Paddy sob was something I hadn't seen since he fell off his bike at 14. Now he was 17 and I knew the pain couldn't be cured by a lollipop and extra cuddles.
"I've got you Paddy." Squeezing my eyes shut, I could hardly imagine what Paddy was going through. I placed a few more kisses on his hairline, hoping he would absorb the warmth and love like medicine. After another 10 minutes he calmed down and we sat on his bed while I stroked his back, didn't ask what was going on because I didn't want to seem pushy. He would tell me when he was ready, so we sat in silence for a while.
"She broke up with me..." she?
"Oh Paddy, I'm so sorry.." a smile crept on his lips. A sad crooked one.
"Yeah. Said she didn't love me anymore. Can you imagine that." I couldn't. I had no idea who he was talking about, but even if I did, I could never imagine not loving Paddy. "Then she gave me back my sweaters and thus ended the relationship." I rested my head on his shoulder, knowing how he felt. "God I'm pathetic, am I not?" I shook my head gently, that was enough for him to know that only he thought about himself that way.
"Tom and I won't stop arguing." I admitted, somewhat suddenly, but I had the feeling that if he knew I was having a bad day too, he would feel better.
"Why?" He asked, sniffing before wiping a tear off his cheek. I shrugged my shoulders, if only I knew.
"God, I don't know. I guess I'm too clingy, too worried, while he just wants his peace and distance from me." He let out a sarcastic chuckle, then leaned his head against mine and said.
"My brother is annoyed by many things, but never could he get enough of you. Ever. If anything, you fight because he needs your closeness. Not because you give him too much. Trust me. His cold little heart is only longing for you and that's why he's looking for a fight to make it stop. When in fact he needs you to make it stop." He spoke some rather wise words, and I wondered if he was right. Did Tom miss me as much as I missed him and is that the reason why he distances himself so much? Does he think it will stop when he doesn't have me around anymore?

I felt a warm drop running down my cheek and only when I wiped it away did I notice it was a tear making its way to curve of my lips.
"God Paddy, I'm here to cheer you up, not for you to cheer me up." He laughed, and then I joined him.
"Now look at us, we are both crying." And then we both laughed. With pain coming from our throats, but we laughed as if we had no problems at all.

"Now come on, there is someone out there waiting for you who desperately needs hugs." I stood up and pulled on his arm. My little son had been asking for his uncle all evening.
"Look at me, my eyes are all red, I can't go out like this!" He argued, but I just rolled my eyes sarcastically. Knowing we were still joking around.
"It is already as dark as midnight outside." I replied, but it didn't seem to convince him. Then I spotted a pair of sunglasses on the nightstand and quickly took them in my hands.
"Et voilà!" I exclaimed, being pleased when I pushed the sunglasses up the tip of his nose. "Now look at you! No one will even suspect a thing!" And even though he looked stupid with Nikki's pink sunglasses, we went out into the dark garden. The campfire was still burning and crackling, while everyone else sat spread out around it. Everyone except Tom. I sent Paddy already to the bench on which Harry was holding Parker, and then I leaned down to Ciara, asking where Tom was.
"Oh, he was only outside for a moment when he got a call. Since then he's been inside on the phone." That explained where he was. I sat down on one of the empty benches stuffed with blankets and pillows and starred into the fire like everyone else.

I was happy to see Paddy feeling a little better holding Parker, I was even happier to see Parker falling asleep in Paddy's arms and Paddy closing his eyes to get some rest. I was also happy to see Harry falling asleep on Ciara's lap and to see Sam watching his daughter sleep, smiling at her like it was all he had left. Then I was happy to see Dom holding Nikki as if they were still 20 and to see Nikki placing a kiss on her husbands cheek. Then I wondered where Tom was and who he was talking to on the phone. I wondered because I cared and worried about him.