Forever and ever 2. The adventure starts now.

Part 168.

Tom's pov~

I understood. Y/N said I wouldn't understand, but I grasped the pain that came with being betrayed by the one person you loved. I knew what it felt like to have your heart shattered, to feel like nothing more than a toy. Perhaps not exactly as she meant it, but was my situation so different? I visited her, and before I even left, she had Clark's tongue down her throat. I felt no less foolish when I forgave her the first time. But it wasn't about me anymore; this was about Y/N.

I had hurt her, the wounds weren't visible, but they were there, fresh and deep. And I lacked the words to justify myself. No apology in the world could make up for what I had done to her. 'You tell me, Tom,' her words echoed in my mind as I sat on the edge of the gym. Clad in nothing more than a black pair of sweatpants, so low that my Lucifer Young underwear was visible, and a black undershirt soaked with sweat from a grueling workout. A bottle of water in my hand, cold and refreshing.

I had an extra-long session to clear my head, and besides, it was Saturday. Parker wasn't in kindergarten, so I had nothing else to do but grab a bottle of rum later at the supermarket. I was on my way to the liquor aisle when I saw the most beautiful woman of my life reaching too high for a yogurt in the fridge. Her toes straining without my help.

My heart began to pound as though a herd of horses were galloping upon it, almost painful in its anticipation of the forthcoming encounter.
I stepped behind her, deciding to help. My chest grazing the fabric of her summer blouse, reaching over her hand to retrieve the yogurt. She smelled like the sweetest flower, and a blush crept upon my cheeks when she must have noticed me taking another deep breath.

Strawberry flavor, just the way she liked it. I examined the package, quickly realizing I hadn't actually fetched it for myself when she turned around. Her lashes fluttered delicately, her lips appearing soft, and yet I knew she harbored fear of me. Perhaps it was the haircut she hadn't yet grown accustomed to, or maybe it was something deeper. Maybe she had expected someone else, maybe even someone to fall in love with.

"Sorry," I murmured, pressing the yogurt into her palms. She didn't want to see me, had made that abundantly clear, had set boundaries, and yet I crossed them, even in my attempt to help. She forced her lips into a strained smile, Parker peeking out from behind her legs, not recognizing me. He didn't even dare to meet my gaze, and I knew, my little hero feared me.

It wasn't a feeling any father ever relished, but it wasn't exactly easy to change either. Y/N quickly noticed my lingering gaze, down at our son peeking out from behind her legs. She knew that even though I hadn't seen him much lately, I still longed for him. But how the hell was I supposed to articulate that? I was too ashamed to ask. How could anyone know how much I wanted my family back if all I showed them was the complete opposite?
I was just the dick raping his wife and leaving his son behind. That's all everyone was seeing in me.

Finding the right bottle of rum was all I needed for tonight, so I approached the checkout counter to unload my item. The cigarette advertisement right in front of my face, never getting more attention than a viled glance. I had tried it once at some party with a co-star when I was 21, but that was it. It was the nastiest thing I had ever put in my mouth. And I know, that's what he said. I get it.

Y/N appeared right behind me as the cashier scanned the bottle, and I pulled out my card to pay. Swallowing a lump of embarrassment as Y/N spotted the bottle and chose to ignore it. Thank God. But she was pregnant, and the shopping cart wasn't exactly empty. So, I helped her with the groceries without asking. Who cared if she wanted me there or not? I'd rather have her hate me even more than see her suffer from back pain or risk harming the baby by exerting too much.

I paid as well, and Y/N rolled her eyes, thinking I did it because she couldn't handle it. But I knew pretty well she could carry the bags herself, and paying wasn't a problem either, but what was the harm in doing it? We were married. That's what the rings on our fingers said. Parker strolled with his action figure behind us in the parking lot, and I packed Y/N's groceries into the car whether she insisted or not.