Forever and ever 2. The adventure starts now.

Part 181.

~Please listen to Lana Del Rey or Billie's new album for the vibe of this part😪~

Tom's pov~

Some part of myself held me back from doing what I wanted. Since when these inhibitions? Since when this fear of making mistakes? Pulling things further into the depths, corroding them until they were riddled with holes and unrecognizable.

10 words. 27 letters. One question.
Y/N stared into my soul. Perhaps just seconds, perhaps hours. My mind, a singular void.
"Anything wrong?" A feigned accusation in the cadence of her voice. Having better things to do than answer questions that were hopeless.
"No." I shook my head. All the courage and determination to approach her, to separate her from the others, to even face her, now rendered futile.
Y/N furrowed her brow. Rightfully so. It wasn't every day someone addressed her without really doing so.
"Okay?" She narrowed her eyes, turning to walk back to her friends by the lake. The sunset today wasn't anything special, yet we welcomed the warmth after the hot day we'd had. Paddy still out for a swim. Watching him pull himself up onto the dock, ready for the next dive. Parker nibbling on a slice of watermelon by the edge of the table. The guys standing in a circle near the water, Harrison smoking, Sam typing on his phone. The scene somehow feeling melancholic, or perhaps it was just my own desperation speaking. Why was it so hard for me to ask my wife out on a date? Was it truly the fear of rejection, or had I simply forgotten how to ask her out? Was it something about me? Or something about my feelings...

I tried desperately to find a solution, but it wasn't easy. I distanced myself from the others, settling at the table by the house, pondering how to clear my thoughts, musing on how to stop gazing at Y/N when she looked so stunning; it should be forbidden. Every day, I questioned why our friends didn't see her the way I did. Yet, if they did, I couldn't blame them. Not a day passed without composing poems about her in my mind.

The sun slipped away unnoticed, leaving only the faces of the guys illuminated by fading light. Y/N must have taken Parker to bed, Sam had put his daughter to sleep long ago, and Ciara, Jo, and Zen were nowhere to be seen.

"Guys, I'll just go grab a jacket," Harry announced, as all five of them turned their heels in my direction, approaching the table I was sitting at. The hot day transitioned into an even colder night, so it was justified that Harry needed a jacket on his thin arms.

"Yeah, hurry up, mate," Harrison pulled out a chair. Sam reached for the beer crate by the side. "Anyone want one?" he offered, but my gaze remained fixed on the table's surface. The voices drowned in my head until my freckled brother slammed a bottle of beer right in front of me. "Looks like you could use one," he laughed at me, or maybe he chuckled to himself. Yet, the way he handed me the bottle, I was pretty sure he found it amusing seeing me all alone, as if he never needed his own space.

But I was quite grateful for the beer, could really use one today. After all my blood was almost back to normal. Couldn't let that happen.

"Hey, can someone light the candles? I think I've got a splinter," Paddy exclaimed, suppressed pain evident in his voice from the piece of wood lodged in his finger. But not three seconds later, Harrison pulled out a lighter from his pocket and lit all three candles surrounding us. Harry reappeared through the glass doors.

"Okay, I'm back, boys," he said, pulling out a chair, surveying the scene where Sam was back on his phone, Paddy was trying to extract the splinter, Harrison was lighting another cigarette, and I... I was drinking a bottle of beer.

"Where'd you get that?" Harry's question carried a hint of accusation. His cheeks almost paled at the sight.

I didn't answer him. I wouldn't rat out my brother Sam, but Harry didn't buy that I had taken it myself.