➹ LEFT TO LOSE ➷ chishiya s.

➸ CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

NOW PLAYING ...
Leaving Tonight • The Neighbourhood

! AUTHORS NOTE !
uhhh hi, sorry this took a while to release, but i wanted to explain, so please read. i have rewritten this chapter so many times, really because i feel so uncomfortable just creating this interaction between Banda and Y/N. i wanted to make it as realistic as possible, but unfortunately Banda is a literal serial killer and canonically only kills women... and Y/N is a woman. the torment and physical pain i've written Banda inflicting on Y/N is... awful? and i don't want to make any of you read that, so i deleted it all and unfortunately you're left in the dark for a while regarding Y/N's past. the vision i had for her past is bad on it's own, as she got diagnosed with amnesia because of it, but reading it from Banda is even worse.

with that being said, the way i tell how Y/N finds out about her past is... rough, to say the least, but i rather have my performance be worse than y'all's mental health. i'm definitely not over exaggerating when i say that, either. you all come first, and shouldn't be triggered or reminded of personal trauma all for some stupid fanfic. thank you for understanding, and i apologize for any confusion or harm i may have caused! i also appreciate the 10k reads, that's incredible : )

! AUTHORS WARNING !
i'm so glad that i could delete the long list of warnings from before, but i still have to mention some stuff.

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➸ "Alright, it's time." If the loud, gravely voice didn't wake you up, then strong arms flinging you upright from the ground definitely did. Your headache was still very much there from last night, rushing up to greet you once you were lifted off of the leaves. Though, you didn't want to think of anything else regarding last night.

"Rise and shine," Banda walked into your field of vision, while the other walked out. "Are you hungry?" You didn't respond, your stone expression not faltering in the slightest to speak to him. "Doesn't matter, wasn't gonna give you anything anyway."

You stayed completely zoned out on the ground ahead, begging to focus on anything else other than the monster that stands before you. You couldn't look at him, no, not after what he told you, what he did to you then.

Banda crouched down to your level, which normally would aggravate you but you didn't have the energy to fuss. "Silent treatment, I see." Banda sighed, "Not for long, though." The skinny man shuffled his hand around a pouch hooked onto his belt, releasing it so it would fall to the floor. He unraveled it to showcase his collection of weapons, dozens all cleaned nicely as if he didn't put them to use the night before. You screwed your eyes shut, heart beat racing just looking at them. You had cuts with dried blood, bruises with swelled up bumps, and dirt stuck on sweat scattered across your body, all evidence of what he put you through.

For once in your life, you prayed for your amnesia to kick in and wipe away everything revolving around Banda. But, no matter how hard you tried, even with how hard you repeatedly slammed your head on the tree you were tied against, nothing could erase the imagery he drew for you in your mind.

At the beginning of your talk with Banda, he asked you what your earliest memory was. Even though you've debated on it with yourself for a while, you hate to admit that you needed some time to think. There wasn't many memories left before the Borderlands, and even here did you not have many to cherish. On the quietest nights, you find yourself rummaging the file cabinets of your brain to discover the earliest memories you could think of, placing them in order of your life's timeline. There's not much to go off on regarding sorting the events, however what they all had in common was taking place in your hospital room. Unfortunately, a time before being admitted there is nowhere in your memory.