➹ LEFT TO LOSE ➷ chishiya s.

➸ CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

NOW PLAYING ...
Leaving Tonight • The Neighbourhood

! AUTHORS NOTE !
soooo... we have this chapter, another one, theeeen a special chapter (a look into the future). i would say this went by so fast... but it's been months LMAO. though it will be weird going forward, as i always woke up and told myself "i need to think of how to plan the next chapter", and i won't be doing that anymore :' ). DON'T GET ME WRONG, i most likely will release a different book eventually in the future, but it won't be a Chishiya book, probably not even one in Alice in Borderland.. but seriously, i know you all have been waiting on a kiss for OVER FORTY CHAPTERS... and you're finally getting one. was it worth it? proobably not! deal with it!

! AUTHORS WARNING !
not too bad, just description of blood
and old injuries.

—
꧁♚————————{♛}————————♚꧂
—

➸ "There she is." The voice drowned in your ears, muffled to the point the words were incoherent. The world was dead silent as you slowly grasped consciousness, peeling your eye lids open. The sky overhead was dark, but it wasn't pitch black, just a navy blue. Specs of white scattered the darkness, some bigger than others, most barely even noticeable.

"This is my first night seeing stars in the Borderlands, y'know." You received chills from the quiet voice in your ear, its source being a few inches over your head. You reverted your gaze from the sky to who sat next to you, the white reflective jacket being a key indicator on who the mystery person was. Even so, only one person would speak to you so sweetly in a deadly night like you were the only person in the world, and that was Chishiya.

"Shuntarō," You gasped to yourself, eyes widening at his own pair.

He was taken aback by the sudden use of his first name, and even a smile creeped up his face. "Wow, referring to me by my first name now? Must be pretty serious."

His sarcasm was no surprise to you, but the way you felt was. It was like your third eye opened, now seeing Chishiya in a new light. It was all so confusing to you, as you truly did like him before, but now? It was different, you felt different, but why?

"Oh my god, Shun!" You popped up from the ground to wrap your arms around him, desperate to engulf him in your body warmth. With the utmost gratitude for the gesture, he welcomed you gracefully. The night was cold, but you were warm, finally you felt comfortable in your skin and everything came natural. Before, you always seemed to be lost, no idea who to be, how to act, and where to go. Now, you finally had your answers— your prayers.

"Oh my," Chishiya grunted, "We were only separated for a few hours."

However, that wasn't true. Truly, you had been gone for years, and finally returned to where you needed to be— who you needed to be.

"No, you don't understand." You pulled away enough to connect eye contact with Chishiya, but made sure to keep a tight grip on his hoodie. "Shun, I-I'm here, finally, I'm with you."

The man cocked an eyebrow up, making your mind run even faster on how to put into words what you had discovered. "Back in the hospital, you told me about who I was to you— and although I believed your every word, I couldn't remember anything. You would tell me these stories about us, about who I was, and it felt like you were talking about a totally different person. No matter how hard I tried, or how many entries I read in my journal, I couldn't understand the fact that I've forgotten my life and my identity."

Chishiya's chest felt heavy, his breathing pattern stammered as he looked down at you. He didn't know what you were going to say next, and he hated that, he hated the unknown he can't seem to reveal no matter how hard he put his brain to the task. His tongue dried up in his mouth, lips parted to let in pockets of air.

"But now, I'm finally that person in your stories." Your eyes began to water, "Shuntarō, I remember. Every single thing that was so precious to me, those moments I held onto desperately so I wouldn't forget the next day, it now all feels like it happened just yesterday."

Chishiya didn't utter a word, not even the slightest breath of air escaped his lips. He had completely paused in real time, holding his breath as his muscles tensed up. Weirdly enough, he couldn't understand his physical reaction to your words. Nothing was clicking in his brain, the dusty clockwork hadn't budged although you're speech was comprehendible.

You took another breath, "I remember how you'd reorganize the furniture and decoration in my hospital room everyday to see if I'd notice, despite you being a neat-freak about keeping things in a specific order. I remember the funky and random colored trays you'd use for your tools and supplies, and you made sure to never have the same dull colors as my room. I remember everything about the first and last time I saw you cry, a child had died because you were ordered to push back his surgery."

The last flashback made the man in question release a shaky breath, refusing to blink as he stared at you intensively. He was no longer confused, he understood your every word, he just didn't know what to do about it. His body was having a completely different reaction to the confession than his mind was. He didn't cry when you did, though his eyebrows curved downwards when your tears dripped from your wet eyelashes.

Your mouth had ran dry from your rambling, it running faster than your thoughts for the first time. You had so much to say, but you knew that Chishiya only needs to hear one thing.

"I remembered how I loved you," Your lips quirked upwards. "Shun, I love you."

At last, you zipped your lips shut, shining the spotlight onto Chishiya, who could only muster up a deep breath. In this moment, he wasn't a nonchalant guy who had an unshakable composure. No, in this moment, he was that happy guy again who could rest safely in his lover's arms. He flicked his switch and kicked his survival instincts into overdrive so he could live to see the day where he could flick it once more and never have to touch it again.

In much simpler terms, Chishiya didn't want to live a life where he has to be alert at all times and think only logically using his head. That wasn't living, that was surviving, and he can only truly live with you by his side.

With that being said, the simplest way for Chishiya to put his thoughts and feelings out on display for you to digest was to kiss you. He couldn't spit out a sentence within a normal person's comprehension, so he used his mouth for something else. He used it to show that he had been patiently waiting for you to come back to him. He used his hands to pull you in closer to show that he doesn't want you to leave his sight again. He used his body to show that he hasn't stopped loving you, even when you had forgotten how to.

Everything around you was quiet during the moment, just the rustling of your clothing and short moments of panting in between your share of passion could be heard. Though, what had finally broke the silence was a booming sound from the sky, causing you to flinch at the abrupt interruption. Both of you guided your eyes towards the sky to investigate the source, your concerns being put to rest soon enough by the next loud noise. It was caused by huge fireworks shooting up into the night sky, overlapping the silver stars with an impressively large palette of other colors. They lit up Tokyo beautifully, like you were back in the real world enjoying a huge city festival. Watching the beautiful sight in Chishiya's loving arms felt natural to you, and you couldn't wait to spend more moments like these with him.

Your eyes focused back onto the man, and he did the same with a beautiful smile. "Welcome back, My Love."

—
꧁♚————————{♛}————————♚꧂
—

THANK YOU FOR READING!