4. Different Routes

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Evan pulls the sheet off my stomach as he holds the syringe between his fingers

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Evan pulls the sheet off my stomach as he holds the syringe between his fingers. He's propped up on his elbow, focused on the task at hand.

"What do you want to do today?" He asks, wiping my lower abdomen with an alcohol wipe. Evan flicks the syringe like a true Doctor on a medical show. My phone is propped up on the nightstand, recording.

"I dunno. There is a hockey game tonight." I smile.

"You want to take a professional hockey player to a hockey game?" He asks and I smile wider. "Marry me."

I wiggle my ring finger, flashing him my wedding ring. "Already did, but I'd do it again."

I feel Evan pinch my skin between his fingers as he softly smiles at me. "Alright, but you gotta wear the same dress." He glances up at me and changes the subject. "What if we hit up the zoo and then the game tonight? I'll see what seats are available." I feel the needle push into my skin and I suck in a sharp breath, reaching out to grip Evan's bicep.

I hate this. I hate this. I hate this.

It's kind of ironic that the woman who is afraid of needles has them stuck inside her on a weekly basis.

Pain erupts in my lower abdomen as Evan slowly injections the medication. "And we can eat at Union Station if you want." His voice is calming, so I'm not as tense as I used to be when I got shots as a teenager. "We can see the Arch tomorrow if you want, and then go to the City Museum before we fly back home."

Evan places a gauze cotton pad where the needle is and pulls the needle out, quickly applying pressure to the injection site. He dips his head and presses a soft kiss to the bruise on the other side of my abdomen, where my lsat injection was. "All done, baby."

He disposes of the needle and gauze pad, turns off my phone, and lays back down beside me, pulling me to his side. "I am so beyond proud of you." I feel warm lips pressed against my temple before they are gone.

I lay my head on Evan's chest, listening to his heart beat beneath my ear. "I wouldn't want to do this with anyone else, y'know."

"You and me forever, baby." Evan raises his fist in the air and I laugh. "And hopefully some mini you and me's someday."

I feel my smile fade as Evan rubs my back. "Everyone keeps saying it's gonna happen, but will it really?" I push myself up on to my knees, letting the sheet pool around my waist. "Maybe it's a sign that we should quit trying, because it's never gonna happen."

"Hey, hey." Evan's hand lands on my forehead and he pushes my bangs back. "Don't talk like that, baby."

"No, Evan. We can't keep pushing this conversation back. Some things aren't meant to be, and that's okay."

He shakes his head as he too sits up. "It's not okay. This isn't a damn failed relationship, Ellie. This is our future child we're talking about. The one that the doctor said we have a chance at having. And you just want to give up?"

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