Homeless Vain

26

Trailing down the staircase in despair, it felt like my feet was dragging me despite my body didn't feel like to. I didn't even want to wake up from my bed honestly.

Something about having hopes was slowly killing me from inside.

It was my fault, I humbly admitted. I should've laid low without doing anything but why couldn't I? Why must I keep a hope up even I know that I would end up being crumbled?

I took a leap into the kitchen for a glass of cold water to ease the heat steaming up inside me. A sigh rolling out from my lips, for the tenth times only this morning.

My mother was inside, packing up some desserts she made since the dawn. A piece was stalling in the air as she heard my sigh filling in the area that I myself didn't know that it was quite disturbing.

I ignored her, straightaway making my way towards the fridge. Apparently not on purpose, I just wasn't in mood to answering any questions from her. On top of everything, I wasn't in mood to hear her speculation about this and that.

"Why? Is Kevin not responding to you?" she questioned. I was giving my back at her but I could've sworn I felt her stare piercing through the back of my head. "Just accept the fact that he's not coming."

"Mother, can you stop?" I rolled my eyes in annoyance, still hadn't looked at her yet. Clenching my fist tight till the veins popped out, I took a deep breath, holding myself from bursting. "You were wrong about him once."

I turned around, facing her at the kitchen counter, lazy eyes were looking at her.

She wasn't effected - of course. In this world we're living in, parents was never wrong, it was only a coincidence that their guess was not right.

Cruelty at its best.

"You can stop making assumption as well," I added, filling up the empty glass with the cold water I took out from the fridge.

"I am an old woman, Ivy," she said, closing the lid of the Tupperware. "I've been through this life more longer than you did. I can simply tell you what's going to happen just by looking."

I know what she's going to say. I'd been living with her all my life, I knew what was playing inside her head. And I knew, she had been keeping that for quite some time, finding the exact time to shout it out, pulling me down to the ground.

"And..?"

"Until when must you wait?"

"Oh please, not this again," I slammed my hand softly onto the kitchen counter through gritted teeth.

Among many days, I really didn't want to be messed up emotionally today and tomorrow.

It was today - which Sangyeon had planned to hold the small party, and tomorrow I'll be going to the reunion.

"I better move now. Don't want to be stuck in the heavy traffic," I announced, skimming my blue blouse that fortunately paired well with the black jeans. "And don't worry. I'll be confessing to him so you can sleep well at night."

I took the Tupperware, knowing in prior that she wanted me to bring it to the gathering. I trailed the corridor towards the front door, footsteps were heard behind me.

I thought it was normal, like any other days everytime I would leave the house. Maybe it was the same like that, but the different was, she took the chance to again spitting unnecessary words.

"You want to confess? But you're a girl," my feet halted before I could even reach the door. "Confessing is a boy's job."

What year does she live in right now?