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"Mm." I exaggerate the humming, trying to get the boy next to me to eat.
We are seated on the couch, in the living room, watching a horror movie. He seems to be paying more attention to the TV instead of the cheesecake slice waiting for him on the plate he's been holding for minutes now.
"Why don't you eat?"
He remains silent, so I place my hand on his shoulder. "Huh?"
"I asked you why you avoid food."
"Don't open up that topic, please." a shiver licks up Jisung's spine.
"It's worrying. You haven't eaten much these days. Only dinner because I forced you to."
Jisung lets out a sigh, resting against the couch. "Eating is hard for me. There, you have your answer."
"Yes, Sherlock, I figured that too. But why? Food gives you energy. It's essential."
"Parents."
"But you don't see them anymore, right? Why not take advantage of that?"
"Because, Minho," he turns to face me. "Once you have been traumatized, it won't ever go away."
He's right. I know that too well.
"True, though you should start eating. I know it might seem a bit hard now, maybe even impossible, but with small bites you can do it."
"I'm too fat." Jisung shakes his head, hand snaking around his stomach.
"Fat? Are you hearing yourself, Jisung?" I furrow my eyebrows, not believing the words I'm hearing right now.
"My cheeks are so chubby! Can't you see?" with his free hand, he points to his face and squeezes the chubbiness of his cheek between two fingers.
"So what? I think they make you.. you. You look cuter like that. I don't even want to imagine you without them."
"I-It's just that I'm already unattractive. My cheeks make me go from a two to a one." Jisung frowns, lowering his head.
"Who told you that?"
"Lots of people, Minho."
"Well, they can go fuck themselves. I find your appearance pretty cool."
Ignoring my own thoughts, I take his fork and puncture it in the cake, then raise it to his mouth. He looks into my eyes, baffled.
"Eat."
He gulps but ends up opening his mouth and chewing on the dessert we worked on together.
"Good?" I tilt my head, getting another piece of the cake to feed it to him.
Am I really doing this? That's weird. It's not a Minho thing. That means I changed. I don't really like that.
Does that really mean I changed, then? Minho doesn't show affection.
