Twin Flames: a YRKKH Abhira ff

Chapter 37

She knew something was amiss when she saw him, and she was proven correct. Normally even if he had his impassive face on, she could read his eyes, but she couldn't even read them today. She was so sure he was pulling away from her, but why? Her first reaction would have been to internalize it and blame herself but then she saw his tearful eyes after her song and her heart dropped to the bottom of her stomach. He was hurting! Was that why he was pushing her away?

She had had a lovely first day at the hospital and if things would have been okay with Abhi, she would have loved nothing more than to tell him about it and learn everything about his day but it was like he had disappeared off of the face of the earth. She was elated for her work but dejected at his cold shoulder. He hadn't given her a single indication that they had shared something and that damn well hurt. Fine, if that was how he wanted to play it she will follow along, she couldn't make someone open up if they were hellbent on being closed off! With her stern resolution in mind, Akshara went about the rest of her day.

Akshu woke up the next morning, did her riyaaz before going over to rooh late afternoon for the young kids would have been back by then. She spoke with a couple of kids after school and did a couple of sessions with some young ones who seemed inquisitive enough to sit and learn or sing and hum with her. The two teenagers were still apprehensive of her and Akshara realized that a lot of their traits matched those of Abhi's. She felt a fissure through her heart every time she saw the teens, was her Abhi just a hurt child who could never heal? How tired must his shoulders be to carry around all these years of pain and heartache. If only he would let her in...this is exactly how Akshara's days and weeks passed, flitting between Rooh and the hospital, making treatment plans with certain interested patients and for the children at the orphanage. Her classical evenings were a massive hit and normally people clambored and fought to get a front row seat, the drum circle was a slow start but after almost 3 weeks, she had about 10 people sign up which wasn't as bad she thought it would be. Her and Sahil had also become quite close, and they even did joint sessions for some kids which had been super fun and enlightening. While her professional life could never have been better, her personal life was giving her anxiety like never before.

Her and Abhimanyu crossed paths a couple of time both at the hospital and once even at Rooh but he barely acknowledged her. They even had dinner with the Birla siblings every week at one of the most romantic places in Udaipur but Abhimanyu almost always came late and barely spoke to her. The only time she felt like his mask was slipping for even one tiny second was during her classical nights. Abhimanyu hadn't missed a single one of those, he always stood in the farthest corner from her where she could hardly see him amongst the rush of patients, but he always turned up and left right before she could wrap up the session. It got to the point where Akshara was second guessing everything and wondering if she had made it up? She could feel herself spiral every night before bed and was always left wondering if he too was thinking of her in the days, they didn't see other. Was he as desperate to know where she was and what she was doing every second of the day? Every time she thought of letting go and moving on, her mind would flash the image of Abhimanyu's tearful eyes and she was reeled back in.

The unrest in her heart got so bad one weekend after another one of those dinners that she felt like she would die if she didn't find a solution soon. Maybe she should consider dating and moving on from this mess? He had never promised her anything of course so it wasn't his responsibility what Akshara was feeling currently, this was her burden to bear. It was closer to 1AM over the weekend, almost a full month after she had started working at the Birlas and she couldn't sleep. Normally she would talk to her sister or even Sudhanshu but she barely got to see Aaru maybe once during the day for a few seconds before she was rushing out for some emergency or the other. Poor Aaru almost always looked like a dead woman walking but she had heard that intern year was always this bad plus HE was a hard task master. Sudhanshu had also gone back to his life in NYC, Kairav and Vansh bhaiya were busy in the business and Akshara suddenly felt a wave of loneliness that cut her deep. With quiet steps she went to the kitchen to make herself some warm milk with honey, hoping it would help her distress. Grabbing her warm mug, she went out to the garden to sit out and maybe breath some fresh air and sing? That generally helped put her to sleep.