Deals with Daisy // LN4

56 ~ Eight

Daisy's POV

It's crazy how much your whole world can change in less than 24 hours.

24 hours ago I was a headline arguing with Luke.
24 hours ago I had a Ferrari and while I wasn't totally sure - I'm pretty sure now I had a piece of scrap metal with a Ferrari badge somewhere within it.
24 hours ago I was healthy.
Now I was lying in a hospital bed.
Now Lando didn't have a girlfriend.
Now I was relying on machines and fighting every nerve in my body to not grab the button that Lando had offered me before. It was only once he was out of my room that I could wince to my heart's desire, letting Limler exam the stitches in my stomach and ask me questions.

"All looks good, however I can see you're struggling so I'll adjust your pain medication," she says while making notes once the exam is finished and I shake my head, pulling the covers back up my body as though that was going to protect me.

I pause for a moment, thinking my words through, wavering for a moment before I see the bouquet of daisies that Lando's mum had dropped off. I know it was her because I remember hearing Max laugh about it at some point amidst the chaos in my head. "Actually don't," I instruct and when Limler looks at me confused I swallow nervously, looking down at the covers as I speak. "I want you to stop all pain medication."

"It will be a lot harder to recover from your injuries if you reject all pain medication," she says, her voice filled with caution and I look back to see her almost frozen as she asks me the question and I nod, biting back any further response. warningly and I just nod as I look around the room, noticing a couple of things left here and there. "We made sure that nothing in your system would react badly with what was there already," she tries to reassure me.

"I'm an a-addict," I say, my voice faltering on the final word, so disgusted with myself for having to say it again. From admitting the nasty scar on my character exists even though it's the truth. "I can't have any of it. Anything required to stop me from getting an infection, to help on a basic level is fine but no painkillers. I'm the patient, I get to decide. If it takes me longer to recover then it does but I can't have anything else."

"Okay..." she concedes after a moment, looking over the chart and scrawling a few more things down as I sigh with relief and relax back into the sofas again. I hadn't been awake for that long but I was already running out of whatever energy reserves I'd had initially.

"It stays between us right? Doctor-patient confidentiality?" I ask and she eyes me warily before nodding.

"Yes it does. Although I heavily recommend that you talk with those around you who will be supporting you through your recovery. Both physical and otherwise..." she continues to try and warn me. I just smile, looking away once more, trying to silently thank her for her work without committing to doing anything. "I'll organise for someone to come and take the pain reliever IV system?" She asks and I nod, knowing that I can't be trusted to have it here. If I have it then it won't take much longer for me to use it. "Can I put another caution on this," she adds as she gets to the door and I sigh heavily, my eyelids starting to get heavier.

"You can but I'm stubborn and... I-I need to not have this happen again," I tell her, my voice wavering and I can see her about to talk again but I interrupt before she can continue. "Trust me, I'd be pushing that button like there was no tomorrow if I'd woken up alone... but I need to get it under control and it starts now. I need to get better and it's all or nothing with me. So it has to be nothing," I explain and she sighs but nods before smiling at me and moving to exit the room following a final check of my vitals.

I appreciated what she was saying. Truly I did. Even with whatever pain meds I was on at the moment, my entire body hurt. The tube inserted to re-inflate my lung after it collapsed was due to be removed this afternoon but it didn't stop it from hurting, it hurting to breathe. One top of that I could feel my ribs, which wasn't an experience I had much noticed before and certainly did not cherish now. It felt as though a UFC fighter had sucker punched me in the stomach, directly hitting my diaphragm and the bruises I caught sight of as Limler checked my stitches made it look similar.