Pen - pen: Disarm my Pain

PREP

It just hit me right in the guts,
and the pain has lingered for weeks till now,
I don't have the intention to think about it,
but my body shivers when I stare at the distant place,
and my empty mind was filled with it.

It's like a ghost that hunts me in the night,
and a nightmare during a daydream,
it spooks my mortal body till it aches,
makes me wanna run to see a light beam,

No one ever told me about this,
no one told me to prepare for this,
I should've taken a seminar on how to cope with this,
so I can sleep in peace,

I was afraid,
I was broke and uninformed,
That adulthood will hit me harder than puberty,
sinks right under my skin, and this constant hunger to escape poverty,
feels like I'm a trash in a bin,

I am full of potential,
That's all I know,
but I can't find an opportunity,
to help me grow,
This is not the place I want to be,
This is not who I am,
This will break me eventually,
If it reaches the hem,

I was lost,
I am unable to be found,
I haven't seen any light of day,
nor let myself play,
freely swimming in distress,
while carrying a double-edged sword with me on my chest.