Pen - pen: Disarm my Pain

1:36 AM

"I think you're wondering why I am still awake, you know, Sadness and Loneliness of Mind is all it gonna takes"

...

Sitting on my bed,
And thinking about my choices,
Bringing the times where I wanted to get to close to roses,
attracted on somehow makes me more confident in touches,
Till I thorn my own fingers and tear me to ounces,

I wanted to be someone,
That is way more perfect than me,
and I know it is natural to get jealous by someone who's to much different of being me,
Even making my own words to inspire someone,
Doesn't inspires me,

I litterally wake up because I wanted to drink some water,
For it soothes my aching throat,
I can't speak louder for it only silences me more,
and more people will suddenly bring me down,
When I wanted to bring them up,

Some sort of randomness will makes this poem lame,
And even me looks lame too,
Does being so attractive will make you, YOU?,
or attitude and kindess should be louder too?,

The manner of writing this is too much sadness,
And even trying hard to be bold,
As I wrote this there is a wind that continously touching my face,
That makes my eyes tear and says,

"Why does my Username was TearmakeR12, While actually I am the only one who have teary eyes,
And writing poems can't even touches our eyes"

Does the words touches your heart?,
Or your mind just sinks the guilt of reading this?,
You were here because of me,
I am too sweet for you,
And you were so adorable for me,
I am different outside this book,
And this book is different inside me,
1:56 A.M is the current time for this line,
Because I write on the spot where my mind still producing rhymes,

I want to be better,
I don't want to be perfect at all,
For being perfect is too bad for you,
And being better is the next step,
To find the real you,

I don't know,
I am talking about me last 23 minutes ago,
And now I am talking about you,
I wonder about your condition,
I care about you,
In case some didn't check you up,

"How are you?,"
"Are you okay?,"
"Smile, are you lonely?,"

And this is the time I will never forget,
That someone really appreciates me.

2:03 A.M is the current time.