Always and Forever My love

Lonely As Ever

Ashley's POV

The minute I left Lucille, I wanted to go back and say I was sorry, and please forget everything. I just said. I didn't do that, because I felt what I did was the right thing. I still think of her every minute of every day. When I came home, my parents asked me about her and I had to tell them the truth. That was the first time in my adulthood I ever cried in front of my mother. I saw Lucille's call the afternoon that I came home, but I didn't answer it. She kept calling me, but still I never answered. She even messaged me numerous times, but not once did I message her back. I thought of deleting her number, but I couldn't do it. I went out partying with my friends often and drank a lot to get over her, but nothing could erase her from my mind. I even went as far as trying to sleep with another girl, but all I did was kiss her and even that kiss with that girl reminded me of my goddess, so I apologized and left. I haven't been able to move on because everything reminds me of Lucille. My parents could see how miserable I was and what I was doing to my life without Lucille around. Coming home drunk all the time, my studies suffered. Seeing this, my father told me to sort myself out or find my own way in life, which made me really think. I had to sort my life out.

Lucille's POV

It's been awhile now since Ashley broke up with me. Till now, he hasn't contacted me, no messages or even a phone call to check up with me. I stopped eating for months and was only living on coffee and adrenaline. I had lost so much weight, my grades were suffering, and the teachers threatened to notify my mum if I didn't straighten myself out. Which I showed everybody I did, but when I was alone, I still cried for my love. I always listened to sad music and promised myself I would never get involved with another guy again. I swore off love and made it my intention to concentrate only on my studies, to become the best. The only song I listened to was Love and Hate by Camylio and whenever I went anywhere, that was the song I had blasted on my radio. People around me were sick of me playing that song, but I didn't care. A lot of guys hit on me everywhere I went but Rishab was always there to send them away. He was so good to me and his fiancée was always there comforting me as well. She transferred to our university and was sharing the room with Hannah and I. So we became very close friends as soon as we met.

One day at university, the lecturer was teaching a class when a group of guys stormed in, giving all the girls flowers. When they came to me, I took the flowers and threw them out the window, asking them to go bother someone else. I was in contact with Sarah, but I didn't ask her anything about Ashley. I didn't even mention his name. Sarah was getting married and invited me to her wedding, but I declined, saying I couldn't come. I knew that Ashley would be there because he was Selan's best friend and his best man, so I didn't want to go. The pain of having to see him would be too much for me to handle, and I didn't want to risk it. Instead, I told her, I had a major project to do. After trying to convince me and not getting the answer she wanted, she accepted the decision I made and told me she would send me the video and lots of photos, so I could feel as if I was there. Saying goodbye to each other, we finally cut the call. In the meantime, I tried to forget Ashley because it was obvious he was not interested in me, so I had to let go. Day after day, I worked harder in my classes, and soon I was achieving my desired marks.

At night, as I lay in bed, I always think about the past and promise myself to make myself stronger. One night while I was falling off to sleep, my phone ran with an unknown number, so I answered the call, saying "hello" but nobody replied, then they call cut. It happens quite often. Now I just answer the call, saying you can speak whenever you please, there is always silence and then the line goes dead. I really didn't know who was doing that, and I didn't care.