Always and Forever My love

My Own Surprise Awaiting Me

*Lucille*
I just can't forgive Ashley. As much as I love him, I have to think about Cindy's baby. I agreed to go along with pretending to be happy with him in front of his parents, but it's only to buy him some time to finally speak to them, which I do hope will be soon.

I prepared dinner for his parents when they came and had just served them before Ashley could come out of the bath. When he came down, I served his dinner and I sat down to eat also. I couldn't really eat much because I didn't have an appetite, and I was also feeling extremely unwell. Seeing my mother-in-law watching me eat, I just had to eat to make her not suspect anything. Putting the steak in my mouth and chewing it was so hard, but I managed to swallow one bite of it before I had to wake up and run to the bathroom upstairs. Going to the bathroom, I emptied my stomach and felt very dizzy afterward as well. Earlier for lunch, I had made some porridge for myself, now even that was coming out. Feeling so drained, I sat on the floor before I heard a knock on the door and then, the bathroom door opened, revealing Ashley. Coming by me, Ashley asked me what was wrong, to which I replied nothing for him to worry about. I asked him to leave, because I didn't need any help from him. I would sort myself out and then come down in a few minutes. Having no choice in the matter, Ashley left, leaving me alone to gather myself up. A few minutes later, I tried picking myself up, but because I was feeling so dizzy, I fainted.

Two days later, I woke up feeling something on my arm. Opening my eyes, I could see that a nurse was busy checking my blood sugar level and I had a drip inserted on my arm. Wondering what was going on, I asked her "Why am I at the hospital?" She simply said that the doctor would be in soon to speak to me, and then I would be able to get all my answers. She asked me if she should call my husband because he was very worried about me and just left a few minutes ago to go home and change due to being with me the entire time. I told her not to, because I was waiting to see the doctor myself first before I could speak to my husband. Agreeing, she left to go and find the doctor. When the doctor walked in, so did Ashley, so having no choice but to speak in front of Ashley, I asked the doctor to please tell me what was wrong with me. He then told me that I was two months pregnant, and it was due to me not eating properly and being stressed out. That is why I am in the hospital. Looking at the doctor shocked, I asked him "I am pregnant" and he repeated the same answer he had already given me. Yes I am pregnant. After doing a check up and making sure I was fine, he left me with Ashley.

Without saying a word to Ashley, who was over the moon with excitement, I turned my back to him. After a minute or so, I said to him, I don't know why you are so excited, the baby is not even yours. I know who the father is, and I will tell him myself. Coming to the other side of me, Ashley came and looked at me, before saying, "Why are you lying?" "Obviously, if I am the only man you slept with, then the baby has to be mine." Looking him straight in the eye, I said "No Ashley, it's not your baby, I did sleep with someone else, this is the consequences, I have to face now." The look on Ashley's face showed that he wanted to slap me, but he just turned and walked away instead. After Ashley had left, that was when I could finally let my tears fall freely. I cried because I had to lie to him and tell him I was with another man. Because of his mistake, I had to do that. I could not let Cindy's baby suffer because I knew I would be a good mother to my child, but Cindy would never be a good mother to her child and Ashley had to be there for his child, even if it meant my child being deprived of its father, but that would be better.

That afternoon, I was discharged from the hospital and went home with Sarah. I told Sarah the truth about everything and asked her to promise never to let out the truth, which she did. Ashley wasn't even home when I arrived, which was a relief. Going straight to my bedroom, I told Sarah I would be fine and just needed to sleep. Wishing me luck on my way forward, she left to go home.

That night, I went to sleep early and when I woke up in the morning I took a bath and dressed before going down to find something to eat, I heard a knock on my door. Opening my door, the sight of Ashley frightened me. He pushed the door open and told me I needed to get out of his house as soon as possible. He didn't want a cheater and liar staying in the same house as him. Going up to him, I said to him "A cheater!, how?" "Wasn't that the same time that we weren't even together, and you had even slept with someone else, making her pregnant?" Not even listening to me, he attempted to push me out, but I stood my ground and said that this isn't his house only, I paid for half of it, so he better leave me alone, because I would be there for only a couple of months more before, I would finally leave, and we would not see each other again.

Without saying anything else, he walked away. I sat on my bed after he had left and soon heard the garage door opening and closing, signally that he had left. Going out of my room, I decided to skip breakfast and instead went to my first class instead. Feeling a bit weak as I reached my class and having a few minutes to spare, I ran to the university café to grab a quick snack to get some energy for the day. I remembered my doctor had specifically told me that I needed to eat properly if I wanted my baby and I really did want him or her. My baby was my last memory of Ashley, although I can't remember how exactly I fell pregnant, but I know Ashley is the only man I did sleep with, and we had a lot of s.x to doubt the fact that I was pregnant. Pushing all these facts to the back of my mind, I finished up my snack and went into class, just as the lecturer came in. The entire day was spent like that and after class, I went over to a park waiting for night fall before I decided to go home. Going home, everything was dark, showing me that Ashley hadn't come back as yet, so without delaying, I ran to my bedroom to go to bed, locking my door behind me. That night I didn't sleep well, so I was fully aware of Ashley not coming home the entire night. I heard the garage door opening and closing in the morning, so I waited until he had left again before I left my room to go to the kitchen to eat.

For months, things have been going on this way. Ashley and I didn't see each other, and it was better that way between us. Often Sarah came to visit me, and she was so excited about seeing my tummy growing. I had asked her to be my baby's other mother, and she was so happy that I wanted to include her in my baby's life. She came with me for all the cans I went so far and was over the moon feeling my baby's kicks. She was convinced that my baby was going to be a boy and would grow up to become a soccer player, playing for the country eventually. Seeing her excitement, always helped me get through my days properly, and she always made sure I ate properly and took care of myself. I do feel sorry for her, because she can never fall pregnant due to complications, but I was glad that I was giving her a chance to feel motherhood with me.