And in the beginning..There was you!!!

3

(Once Olivia walks in his office he tells her to sit down.)

Olivia: What's going on Captain?

Cragen: When was the last time you heard from Elliot?

Olivia: (taken back) Ummm three days ago why?

Elliot: So he didn't call you? Well Elliot has been suspended until he gets evaluated by IAB again and talk to a shrink.

Olivia: It was a good shooting Cap. What happened has destroyed him and you have no idea how much this is hurting him.

Cragen: I get it, I'm pissed too but there is nothing we can do about it. Now I'm down a detective, so you will have to rotate with John until Elliot is back.

Olivia: (nods) Ok, thank you for telling me.

Cragen: I'm surprised he didn't tell you.

Olivia: Yeah well he's going through a lot right now and I'm giving him the space he needs.

Cragen: How are you doing?

Olivia: I'm fine Captain, just taking one day at a time.

Cragen: Well if you need to talk to someone let me know.

Olivia: I'm good really.

Cragen: Ok, you can go now.

(Olivia smiled and headed back to her desk as her and Fin go over the case files again. They spend six hours going over dead ends but Olivia mind was on what happened three days ago. She can't believe she had sex with her partner/best friend who's in a crisis of his own.  By ten that night she finally made it home and decided to call Elliot one more time before getting ready for bed.)

(It's been a month now since Elliot had been suspended, so she thought. She was at her desk trying to concentrate on the new case they got when Captain Cragen called her into his office. She gives Munch and Fin a look before she gets up and head into his office.)

Olivia: What's up Captain, I was just going over the notes.

Cragen: Will you shut the door, please?

(She gives him a look seeing how serious he looks.)

Olivia: What's going on?

Cragen: (sigh) Elliot put in his papers.

(Olivia feels faint but takes a deep breath.)

Cragen: There was nothing I could do.

Olivia: (chest tightens) He's earned it.

Cragen: And then some.

(He looks for a reaction from her as she tries to control the shock.)

Cragen: You want to talk?

Olivia: (looks up) No.

Cragen: You want to take a day?

Olivia: (exhale) I'm fine.

Cragen: Liv. I'm sorry.

(She smiled a little and nod her head before she turned to walk out his office. She feels like her world is crashing as she walk to her desk.)

Fin: (looks up) Your ok?

Olivia: (looks at him) Yeah!

(Just as she was about to sit down Cragen tells them to gear up.)

Cragen: Fin take Munch.

Olivia: No I'll go.

Munch: Your sure?

Olivia: Yeah, Fin give me five minutes and then we can go.

Fin: Ok, see out front.

(She walks off towards the restrooms as Cragen watches her. She walks pass an interrogation room and decides to go in there. She leans against the door before she finally break down. She moves to lean on the table as the sobs escape her mouth and tears fall onto the table. After a few seconds she collect herself and go wash her face. By the time she makes it to the car she had done calmed down enough so Fin won't ask questions.)

Olivia: Ok let's go!

Fin: Your good?

Olivia: I'm good let's go.

(Not buying it he looks at her and notice the red rings around her eyes and her face a little puffy.)

Fin: You've been crying?

Olivia: Just leave it Fin.

Fin: What did Cap say?

Olivia: (sigh) Elliot turned his papers in.

Fin: Oh damn. I'm sorry Liv.

Olivia: No it's ok, he's earned it.

Fin: Wow, he's a fucking coward.

Olivia: (makes a face) Fin he killed a teenage girl. I can understand where he come from.

Fin: Yeah, but he didn't even say goodbye. I get why he didn't tell me and Munch, but you've been his partner for twelve years.

Olivia: I'm sure he will call soon. He's going through a lot right now.

Fin: Don't make excuses for him Liv. He could have had the decency to tell the one woman who knows him best goodbye. Hell he probably was in love with you.

Olivia: (roll her eyes) Really Fin, Elliot and I respect each other enough to have never crossed that line.

Fin: Yeah, well that's not what people are saying at work.

Olivia: I don't care what people thinks, and can we not talk about this anymore please?

Fin: Fine!

(Two weeks has passed and no word from Elliot or his whereabouts. It was a Wednesday and also one of Olivia worse days of her life. She woke up sick as a dog from puking her guts out. She wipes her mouth and leans back against the tub as she catch her breath. The day before she had a mental breakdown when she realized her period was late. Over almost a month late, she thought it was stress but after taking a test that thought went out the window.)

(Olivia calls Cragen to let him know she would be in late. She had scheduled a doctor's appointment for this morning so she had to get ready for that. After she was able to collect herself, she got dressed and headed to her appointment. She gets there and had to wait for twenty minutes before begin called back.)

Nurse Sanchez: Ms. Benson?

Olivia: That would be me.

Nurse Sanchez: You can come with me.

Olivia: Ok.

(She walks to the back and into a room where she was told to strip down from the waist. She wraps the sheet over her as the nurse take blood and check her vitals. She waited ten minutes before the doctor came in. Olivia sits there as her doctor ask her questions and get her family history.)