Prince In Darkness Sebastian Sallow

Chapter 33: One Drink..... Again

***Present day***

*Alora POV*

I knew Ominis might never look at me the same way he once did. Whether that was being a friend, enemy, maybe once awhile ago a lover. I couldn't have blamed him.... I'd never blame him.

Because in truth, he'd never understand. He'd never understand the torment, the sleepness nights, the screaming in which would keep me up every night. Seeing Sebastians face in that god forsaken cell. Cold as ice, his youth wasting away while I......... sat at home. In the comfort of a fire, a warm blanket to keep warm, regretting every decision I'd ever made to put him in the position in which he is in now.

I had to come to terms that with being underneath the imperius curse, it wasn't truly my fault. I had no idea I had even spilled the information or would have known if it wasn't for the pensieve.

What haunts me is the fact........ I willing, left Sebastian that day to try to save Anne by myself. Putting myself in the worst position possible when maybe the outcome could have been differen't. Those are the demons in which I'd live every day for the rest of my life. That if my actions wouldn't have placed me there, would it have changed.

Would Anne had survived if I brought everyone with me?

If I had taken Sebastian with me, would we have all made it out okay?

Would I have ever been put underneath the imperius curse if I had chosen to listen to him?

Would it have made a difference?

"Alora-"

My eyes met with Ominis, his flashed white orbs sinking in the very hate in which clouded Sebastian's eyes the moment he knew I was the one to do such wrong.

"I'm not sorry......" I whispered, "........... watching her die......... was the biggest comfort I've felt since he's been gone..."

"You think this is what he would have wanted? You wasting your time chasing after her when you could have just moved on with your life!"

His words stung, like a wasp coming in for the kill. Do I honestly even want to know that answer? Does it really even matter now?

I sighed, pulling the hood over my face. Conjuring my broom, letting it lean against me as I gripped the top.

"..... It doesn't really matter now though, Ominis. He's been gone, for nine years.... we haven't received anything from him since. What makes you think he'd ever care what I'd be doing with my time when I was the one who put him in there...."

It was like the air between us got sucked out.

These words, I had been wanting to put on parchment for so long.... trying to explain my feelings, my actions, why things went the way they did.

I knew I didn't exactly have to, but I felt....... maybe after all this time, they deserved an explanation.

They deserved to know.

"He cared about you, Alora....." Ominis whispered, his eyes looking off into the misty night. "You know he did....."

I smiled to myself.

Some memories flashing in my mind of us in the undercroft, studying, just talking. How he.... apologized for being so distance with me........

Merlin..... what I would do to relive it again...... and again.

But with memories comes pain.

So I shut my mind off, pushing it to the dark hole to keep the pain at bay.