Clarity
Hindi ko na inisip na nakakahiyang magwala at umiyak dahil sa sobrang pagdadamdam. Nang ipinaliwanag niya sa akin ang lahat tungkol sa asawa niya ay wala akong ibang ginawa kundi ang masaktan at maiyak para sa kaniya.
Di alintana kung anong tama o maling gawin sa sitwasyon naming dalawa. Halos buong gabi ko siyang niyakap ng mahigpit habang hindi natigil sa kakaiyak.
Sinagot niya ang mga katanungan ko at naliwanagan ako. Kaya ba malala ang naging epekto sa kaniya na kinailangan niyang pumunta at magpa tingin sa isang therapist dahil sa kasalanang ginawa ng kaniyang asawa sa kaniya?
Ito ba ang sinasabi niya sa akin noon na ex niyang nag dulot sa kaniya ng sobrang trauma. Hindi ko nasabi sa kaniya kagabi ang aking plano at sa puntong ito alam kong hindi na kailangan iyon.
Hindi ko itutuloy ang pakikipag hiwalay at sa sitwasyon ngayon mas lalo niyang kailangan ng karamay. Sabi niya sa akin ay on going din ang kanilang divorce, natagalan dahil sa mga kagagawan ng asawa niya.
Pero ginagawan naman nila ng paraan at tumutulong din sa kaniya sila Fabio. Until unti kaming bumalik dalawa sa normal. Balik trabaho at hindi na nag iiwasan.
Ngayon nga lang ay mas pinili ko munang umiwas sa pag punta sa kaniyang apartment kasi hindi ko pa rin kaya na manatili roon matapos kong malaman na bahay din iyon ni Caren.
Kapag may oras naman siya o kaya ay araw na walang trabaho ay siya na mismo naghahatid sundo sa akin. Nagbibigay ng pagkain kapag nasa airport kami o kaya naman ay magkasama na tatambay kapag delayed.
I finally had some free time after a hectic week, so as soon as I got to Dubai, I headed straight to his place and brought some takeout—this time from a Japanese restaurant.
I hurried up to his floor as soon as I arrived at his apartment building, hoping that today would be the one where we could finally clear the air and resolve our differences. Yes, we kind of stopped talking to each other for a bit, but we're trying to rebuild our relationship and find a way to feel comfortable spending time together.
Now that I am aware of the truth of his unhappy marriage, I will make a sincere attempt to feel comfortable in his apartment.
I arrived at his floor just as his mother was getting ready to go. She was a little surprised to see me there, and I could see that her expression soured when she realized It wasn't his true wife but rather me.
I now see why his mother feels that way about me; she likes her in-laws to be lawyers, and I'm not that. She is not impressed with me. She yelled my name out of nowhere and came up to me, asking me to have a little conversation. I sighed.
"Good day—"
"Skip the pleasantries you're not at work and i am not your passenger," singit niya.
Tumabi ako at humarap nalang sa kaniya naghihintay nalang sa kung anong ibabato sa akin. Alam ko at tanggap ko naman na hindi siya boto sa akin at wala akong magagawa roon.
"Although I first opposed their divorce, I now care more about my son's welfare. I am aware that you are already aware of his wife. My son is married. I'm attempting to understand what it is that people find amusing about you, but I can't totally commit to the idea that there will be a child involved—he might be Caren's child's father."
Cello is quite open about her worries, and I have no doubt that she means well. I should accept her views regarding her children's lives and I can't criticize her for wanting what's best for them.
Thus, even though I am aware that hearing this would be upsetting, I make an effort to pay close attention, internalize her ideas, and truly view things from her perspective.
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