Guarded (One Direction Fanfic)

Chapter 59

"Come on." He coaxes.

"I don't want to." I whine.

"Blake, don't argue with me." Louis sasses and I groan. "Come out of that dressing room right now."

I open the door and Louis and Zayn look up. "You look amazing." Louis says, sizing me up.

"I hate it." I admit.

"Just like you've hated the other things we've tried on." I nod.

Maybe that's tells you something Louis.

A familiar head enters the shop and I grin running over and hugging Lou.

"Help me. These boys keep making me wear the most hideous things. They've all been dresses." I plead and she laughs, grabbing my hand and pulling me back over to them.

She goes through everything and makes disgusted comments causing Louis to have a rant and almost get kicked out of the store.

"One more week here in England." Lou states and I nod.

"Then tour!" Zayn cheers.

It's been much less awkward lately and for that I'm thankful.

It was spur of the moment, he was missing Perrie. That's all it was.

"So, what's the occasion we're shopping for?" Lou asks.

"I'm meeting Harry's mom tomorrow." She drops the clothes in her arms and looks at me.

"What?! That's amazing! Oh, she's going to love you!" I sigh dramatically and wave to the guard with the boys as she pulls me out of the shop and to her flat.

She starts digging through her closet and finally pulls out multiple articles of clothing and hands them to me explaining what I'm wearing tomorrow.

I thank her and head back home.

I unlock the house and step inside.

I see a familiar red headed man sitting with my curly haired boy.

"Hey Ed, Babe." I address both of them and Harry jumps up to kiss me lightly.

"Blake, what's a word that rhymes with sink?" Ed asks me and Harry groans.

"Nothing!" Harry says loudly, with fake aggravation. "Drop it. We can come up with a better line anyway."

"Well, it's not going to be a literal rhyme. You could relate it to drinking and do clink or go with with the saying and do sink or swim." Ed's face lights up.

"That's it!" He jots something down and sigh in happy relief. "Thanks. Told you." He tells Harry.

"Hey Ed, how would you feel about doing another tattoo or two for me?" He glances at me.

"Yeah, totally. What do you want?" He sets his guitar down and hands me a pencil and paper he was writing lyrics on.

'You are the earth I will stand upon. You are the words I will sing.'

I turn it around for him and Harry to read.

"What is it from?" Harry asks looking at me.

"It's from one of my songs." Ed says.

"If it's not too awkward." I mumble to myself.

"If you're sure." Ed says and I nod.

"I am."

"Okay. What else?"

I take the paper back. "I want this on my wrist with an arrow coming out of it, going up my forearm."

'History shall be kind to me for I intend to write it. I want to be strong & empowered. I want to shock everybody.'

He nods. "I like it."

I look to Harry. "What do you think?"

"I like it." He says quietly, but doesn't seem focused. Hes watching my hands, completely distracted. I take that as my leave and leave them to their writing.

I go for a run and take a shower, blasting Switchfoot the entire time.

Ed leaves later in the afternoon and Harry and I are cuddling with a movie on the TV that I haven't paid any attention to.

He starts absentmindedly tracing the scars on my wrist. leaving a white-hot trial where his fingertips touch.

We've never talked about these.

Not the self-inflicted ones.

"What are these?" He asks warily.

"They're my battle scars." I tell him, my head still on his soft t-shirt clad chest.

"Who were you battling?" He looks at me confused.

"Myself."

"Why?"

I ignore his question and try to explain. "Scars are like tattoos with better stories. They show wounds that are healed. And the skin that replaces it is four times stronger."

"You were given this life because you were strong enough to live it." His face is expressionless but I know it's just because I hate pity.

"Okay, quote-man. You're turning into Zayn." He smiles back at me.

"You're okay now though?" I nod.

"Yeah. I'm okay now."

"Promise me you'll never do it again." He sounds serious.

"Harry..."

"Promise me." He forces.

"I can't." I say honestly.

"Promise me." He repeats. "Promise me you'll never ever do it again."

"I promise I'll try." I say trying to compromise.

"Promise me you'll call me if you ever feel like trying again and I'm not there." I sigh.

"I promise." I mumble.

"You promise what?" He presses. He's so stubborn. He just knows me too well.

"I promise if I ever try to self-harm again I will call you first." He seems satisfied with that answer and we go back to each others arms, Harry singing small bump under his breath.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And it's kinda short. Get over it.

Jk. I love you. *sheepish grin*

Okay, yep. Okay so there's this thing coming up. And I'm excited. And I'm not telling. Ha!

Wow. I'm in a mood today. Okay.

And thank you for the comments.

And to the new readers welcome.

If you've been a fan for years or for an hour it doesn't matter. You're a fan and for that I thank you. I love you. (Get it? Ed said that.)

Okay.

Vote.

Yep vote.

Fan.

Yep fan.

And comment.

Yep comment.

-Let them go. You're boring them.

I am not.

-yes you are.

Niall, you just want me to make you a sandwich.

-would you?

You have legs.

-please?

No.

-*pouts*

Fine.

-works every time.

I will mess you up.

Kay bye. ;)