Fallen (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 65 - An Island's Ruins

*****

My hand paused just before it could touch the doorknob, and I held my breath letting it fall back to my side with an internal sigh. I had never felt as conflicted about anyone as I did about Hilliel at the moment.

On one hand, I had played a part in how he ended up despite not intending to do so. I thought I had made it abundantly clear that we were just hooking up, but he somehow convinced himself it was more than that. I didn't quite understand how that could happen, but all of my friends had spent the past couple of days trying to explain that not everyone was as 'detached' as I was.

Still, Talian was the only person who convinced me to see Hilliel. His opinion was the only one that actually mattered to me when it came to relationships. He felt bad for the doctor, and I wanted to make him feel better. His urging had made me feel sympathy for Hilliel too.

Was it his fault he had become attached to me? Who wouldn't?

Talian had not thought it was funny when I asked that.

On the other hand, nothing would ever ease my anger at him trying to get rid of Talian.

Still, I forgave him on other levels and knew it would be best to settle things.

I lifted my hand to knock on Hilliel's door, forgetting that I had already knocked and had been about to step inside, but the door swung open before my knuckles could make contact and Zev stepped out.

"Ah, Alpha. Hilliel's ready for you. But before you go in, can you read this folder?"

He held up a red folder between us.

"What's this?" I asked him as I took it. It was quite light. Why was he carrying it around?

"Latest reports on how the integration of the Legacy members into our pack is going. We'll discuss it after you talk to Hilliel. I'll be at the office," he spoke as he made his way around me to begin heading there.

I nodded flipping open the file to glance over the information and then turned to glare at Zev, but he had already run off and I could hear his laughter fading.

"Seriously, those reports are in your office!" he called out.

I shook my head shutting the folder. It contained a single sheet of expensive textured paper that smelled like cinnamon. The words 'I told you so' embossed across the page. He was never going to stop.

Looking inside as I stepped into the house, Hilliel wasn't hard to find as he stood not far away beside the dining room table. His hands were in front of him, his fingers fidgeting anxiously as he stared at me while I shut the door.

"You're looking better."

He was. He had gotten his hair cut and was wearing clean clothing. It seemed he had eaten a bit more after refusing to eat quite often while being held in our pack's jail. His skin had gained some of its colour back and he looked healthier. Despite appearing nervous, he appeared to be in a better mental space as well.

"I'm sorry, Kendrick..." he whispered.

I shook my head as I stopped, keeping a distance between us.

"No. I'm sorry. I was irresponsible in the way I conducted myself, as your alpha and your friend. I may not have purposefully led you on, but I ended up giving you the impression that we were – or could be more."

Looking at him made me feel more remorseful. Seeing him without my anger fully in control made me feel guilty. Everything I had known about him, everything I knew about who he was and how he conducted himself in the past made it so clear to me how out of character what he had done was for him. It made the 'love makes people stupid' argument Belvine had given me even louder.