My Best Friend's Brother

Can We Not (Part 2)

A/N: I tried writing in first person POV but honestly find it awkward so switched back to 3rd person here. Sorry if it throws anybody off!

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-Felix-

"Innie?" Felix's voice was strained and paused by small sobs.

"Felix?! Baby what's wrong?"

The call switched to video and Felix looked at the screen through teary eyes and fogged vision.

"Oh... baby..." Jeongin cooed through the screen.

"I really fucked up... I hurt him.." Felix managed to get out through hiccups and hitches in his breath.

"Felix, baby.. I'm going to need you to breathe, okay?.." Jeongin urged. He modeled the breathing and counted, making sure that Felix was following along.

After about two minutes of breathing through the otherwise silent phone call, Felix could feel himself calm down and become more steady, only sniffling occasionally.

"Good. Now, tell me what happened." Jeongin cooed.

Felix took a deep breath and sighed, gulping before looking down at his hand which was covered in broken skin around his nails and now held crescents on his palm from squeezing through his panic.

"I had my final today...." He took a shaky breath. "My anxiety thoughts were racing and I thought I would be alone, but Jinnie was here.." Felix had to pause and calm his breathing which was starting to get out of control again.

"Shh.. it's ok. Take your time.." Jeongin comforted with a sweet smile.

Once he got his breath stabilized, Felix continued. "Seeing him made everything feel so real. He tried to hug me, but the scent... I... I pushed him... away..." a broken sob escaped his lips and little hiccups followed.

"Lixie.. breathe... come on.. in........ and out..."

"I told him I was scared that I would fail....." Felix inhaled sharply "I told him he was just a dancer and wouldn't understand the stress I'm under...." Felix groaned and hissed, realizing that he had pinched his skin so hard it bruised. 

"Lix...-"

"I'm an asshole... I know." The older groaned.

"I wasn't gonna say that... I was gonna say that you can apologize.. He will understand." Jeongin responded with hopeful eyes.

"That's not it... Innie.... I told him that he was going to resent me if I couldn't do the accelerated track. That I was doing all of this for him and his dream... I pushed him away, said he had it all easy, said he was only making things worse, and pushed the pressure I placed on myself onto him... how could I do that?" Felix cried out. "He said he needed some space to think and he left.. he had a bag, Innie."

Jeongin sighed. "Lix.. I'm not gonna tell you that it was ok what you said... but he loves you and knows that you love him too. You guys will be ok."

Felix sniffled but nodded his head. "I'll make it up to him" he promised.

Jeongin smiled softly. "I know you will... I love you!"

Felix giggled through his sniffles. "I love you too Innie. Wish me luck.."