The Original Ducksekeeter

Chapter 17: The Final Plan

Donald and Daisy were so fucking excited that they could hardly walk straight. Donald was literally falling onto the floor laughing, while Daisy kept on choking with every word she said. Ludwig and Mortimer were even starting to question whether or not Donald and Daisy were okay, but still found their behavior amusing.
"MY BONES ARE TINGLING, I CAN ALREADY FEEL THEIR SOULS LEAVING THEIR BODIES AND GOING TO THE UNDERWORLD!" Screamed Daisy.
"I CAN ALREADY HEAR THE DROPS OF BLOODING HITTING THE FLOOR, DRIP DROP, DRIP DROP!" Donald screamed.
"Okay but bitch first we still have to find them!" Ludwig stated.
"Jiminy probably could have helped us find them if Daisy didn't fucking squish him!" Mortimer scolded.
"There's no proof of that!" Yelled Daisy.
They then started to hear scared and angry shrieks coming from behind them. They looked back to see a bunch of mice pointing and screaming at them.
"That's right we need mouse disguises.
They went back to the Camembert Costume Shop, where the owner of the store was still dead. The ducks walked around until they found the mouse disguises that they had previously been wearing.
"OKAY NOW THE SEARCH CAN CONTINUE!" Daisy screamed.
"I AM GOING TO BUTCHER THEM SO GOOD!" Donald screamed as well.
"IT WILL BE SO BLOODY!"
"IT WILL BE SO GRUESOME!"
"IT WILL BE SO VENGEFUL!"
"IT WILL BE SO DELICIOUS!"
"IT WILL BE SO SATISFYING"
"IT WON'T HAPPEN!" Yelled Ludwig.
"Bitch what did you say!" Daisy sobbed.
"Well being in this store has made me realize that the murder won't happen if we don't have fucking weapons!"
"That's true," Donald said.
Mortimer opened his mouth, "well they could just strangle the..."
"NO!" Daisy yelled, strangling is mid.
The ducks left the Camembert costume shop and began asking mice around the city where they could find a shop to buy weapons at. They went to every single shop that they could find but all of the weapons there were fucking stupid. Half of the shops they went to were actually shops for kitchen supplies, and bitch the kitchen supplies from 1927 sucked. Most of the knives and forks that could be lethal in the shops were made very poorly, and could barely even stab someone to death. There certainly would not be the beautiful level of bloodshed needed that the ducks deserved for their murders. Meanwhile the other shops that were supposed to sell weapons, not just kitchen supplies that could be used as weapons, were so boring. There was absolutely no arranged of fun to be had with these shops and the ducks just wanted to fucking murder themselves while looking through them.
"I CANNOT BELIEVE WE LOST THE DAMN BAG!" Sobbed Daisy.
"Well believe it now bitch because we have to deal with it!" Ludwig screamed.
"Can't you just make a new bag of weapons and devices!" Donald yelled at Ludwig.
"All of my laboratory shit to make it is in the future, which we can't get to now because my Time Machine is gone!"
Daisy was now on the floor in the middle of the weapon shop crying her damn eyes out, and getting a lot of stares from other customers.
"I can't handle this right now!" Daisy sobbed, running out of the store and into the streets.
"Daisy it isn't that bad," Mortimer said, while he and the other two ducks walked out of the store.
"But we have no weapons, we still don't really know where those fucking mice are, it is bad if you ask me!"
Suddenly a pervy old man walked up to Daisy.
"Ew get away from me gramps!" Daisy said, slapping the man in the face, "you're more weird than my actual grandpa, and his wife is his granddaughter!" Daisy looked around, "but not me."
"I heard that you're looking for weapons!" The elder mouse said.
"Bitch quit eavesdropping!" Ludwig yelled.
"I know someone who makes really good weapons, he lives out in the desert!" The man smiled creepily.
"I don't know," Donald said.
"TAKE US THERE BITCH!" Daisy screamed.
"Hold the fuck up!" Donald yelled.
He motioned for all the ducks to get away from the old man and once they were all away he whispered, "we can find weapons somewhere else, but we are not going with that psycho!"
"It is rude to judge people off of how they look Donald!" Scolded Daisy.
"Daisy, we are not going with him!" Mortimer stated.
"Yes we are!"
Daisy walked away from the group and back up to the man where she said that she was coming with him.
"I swear to God!" Donald stomped.
The ducks followed the man to a car that looked outdated even by 1927's standard. The paint was completely off of it, there were scratches all over the place, the top of it was completely broken off, and there were bugs crawling all around the seats.
"Get in, we'll have a fun ride," the old man giggled.
The ducks got in the car which moved so slow that if you had been watching it you would have thought that it was standing still. The car drove for two days before the ducks saw that they were in what looked like the desert, and a clown was standing there waiting for them.
"Daisy, I swear to God!" Mortimer yelled.
"Maybe he's a nice clown," smiled Ludwig, as the clown began laughing so hard that he started coughing up blood.
"I found some friends for you Mr. Sprinkles, they are honestly some of the most retarded I've ever met, it took no convincing at all to come with me!" The old man said, "I'll let you start with the little lady, she is so hot!"
"Thank you," smiled Daisy.
"RUN!" Donald yelled.
The ducks jumped out of the nasty ass car and began running. They could see the city in the distance, as the car really did not drive them too far, and so they ran as quick as they could to reach there. The old man tried to chase after them, but immediately gave himself whiplash and fell over which in turn fucked up his back. The real problem was that the clown was insanely fucking fast. He ran as fast as he could to reach the ducks, chasing them with a chainsaw and screaming random shit about how he this was because of his dad to which the ducks all started making fun of him for having daddy issues. The ducks realized that they needed to get the upper hand, so Daisy suddenly turned around and kicked him in the crotch, sending him to the floor. Ludwig then picked up the clown's chainsaw and ripped it through his stomach. He then ran up to the old man and chopped his head off, sending it flying across the air.
"That is a nice chainsaw!" Ludwig said.
The other three ducks walked over to see that the clown had a whole bag of weapons, similar to Ludwig's.
"I TOLD YOU I KNEW WHAT I WAS DOING!" Daisy laughed.
"OKAY FINE, CONGRATS!" Donald yelled.
"Thanks," Daisy said with a grin.
They walked back into town, which only took two hours compared to the two days it took to drive out into the desert.
"Okay that covers the weapon problem, now there's only one more thing we have to do!" Donald orgasmed.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Daisy did a scream all of Mouseton could hear.
The ducks started running around town, looking everywhere they could for the mice. Daisy tried thinking back, "okay so we went to the Mouse Café that's now gone, we went to both of their houses, we went to see Walt Disney and the filming of Steamboat Willie, WHERE THE FUCK ELSE COULD THEY BE!"
The ducks all went to a bar, that was a lot less fucked up than the Mouse Café, to take a break from their search and began drinking heavily.
"IWTS JWRUST WISNT FRAIRE!" Daisy slurred, throwing up down her dress.
MWABAHYE TWAIL WRISOCALL IH HAH!" Ludwig said.
"Whrat?" Donald asked.
"MHAYBE THEYRL IHAN HERLL!" Ludwig said again.
"Thrayt bwe nwiced!" Mortimer said.
The ducks went out to look some more, but realized that they could barely walk and so they booked a hotel room. But then ran out of it because it was too sketch so they went to a fancy hotel and killed the mice who were staying in the grandest looking suite. The ducks all drunkenly jumped on the bed, and began screaming as loud as they could. They also killed any mouse that tried to tell them to be quiet. Also if you're confused as to why they were allowed to get away with all this murder it's because it was 1927, and only black people and women who wouldn't fuck their way out of situations like Daisy, got in trouble back then. The ducks had the time of their lives at this hotel and the fun only just got started when they opened up their hotel room closet to find sexy 1920s clothing that showed just the right amount and skin, and ran down to the lobby where they danced the night away in a ball room full of prestigious and beautiful looking mice to Mozart and Beethoven.
"There isn't enough Cardi on this playlist," Daisy complained.
By the end of the night the ducks were so fucking inebriated, with the overflowing alcohol being served down there and the fun lines of coke that were just sitting on tables for everyone's noses to enjoy, that they could hardly even move and had to crawl to get from place to place.
"Mahbwye welve ovhadome iwt!" Donald said.
"BITCH... THIS... IS... THE... ROARING.... FUCKING... TWENTIES!" Daisy echoed around the ballroom.
The ducks were the only ones still in the ballroom by the time the sun rose, but at that point they had all collapsed, except for Daisy who was having a drunken cig and humming Mozart like a lady. They went back to their suite where they collapsed on the bed. When they woke up it was already noon, which pissed Daisy off because she wanted a fake tasting waffle from the breakfast buffet (even though they actually didn't have one). They were so hungover that it made them colorblind. The bathroom and their sexy twenties outfits were also flooded with vomit. Once they were at least somewhat fit to leave the suite, they did and headed for the lobby. But when they got downstairs they saw something that made them all throw up again. Mickey and Minnie.
"Donald I can't take it!" Daisy gasped for air.
"You're gonna have to!" Donald said.
"No I can't, I really can't, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God Donal..." Daisy collapsed to the ground. At first the ducks thought she was dead, but could see that she was breathing only slightly.
"Oh my god she's going into cardiac arrest!" Ludwig screamed.
"GIVE HER MOUTH TO MOUTH OR SOMETHING, HIT HER CHEST TIL SHE WAKES UP!"
Everyone in the hotel ran up to Daisy to try and revive her. People in 1927 were retarded and confused as to what saved people's lives, so they resorted to doing the stupid shit of running into the kitchen, grabbing a plate that was on fire, and putting unit up in Daisy's face to alert her to she was in danger and make her want to quickly wake up. This probably wouldn't have worked because it is dumb, but it did work because the person who was holding it was Mickey, with Minnie clinging onto him from behind. Daisy woke up and began coughing dramatically.
"Mickey why did we have to help that cunt, she's so fucking ugly?" Minnie whispered.
"If we are going to be famous then we have to be seen as nice and perfect," Mickey responded.
"True," Minnie said, all sassy.
Mickey and Minnie walked away, while Daisy jumped up and began running after them, or at least felt like she was running. In reality she, and the other three ducks still had trouble moving and grooving with their hangovers. They made it to the elevators where Mickey and Minnie hopped in with their bellhop who was carrying so much fucking luggage for the dumbass mice that it looked like they were moving in.
"HOLD THE ELEVATOR!" Daisy screamed.
"No," smiled Minnie.
The door shut and went up.
"MOTHER FUCKER!" The ducks all screamed.
They looked at the top of the elevator which had one of those things that shows what floor it's going to, but it was broken and stuck on one, so the ducks had to go onto each and every floor. They broke into every single room and ransacked the place to find the mice but not a single room had them. There were fifty floors in this bitch, so by the time they got to the final room on the final floor, and they were still hungover, every section of their bodies had shut down.
"How did we fucking miss them?!" Daisy gasped.
"They were probably towards the top floor, and already left while we were taking forever towards the bottom one, we should have split up!" Donald stated.
The ducks went back to their room and fell asleep, feeling all defeated. When they woke up they felt much better than they had the day before, with a lot of energy and sobriety in their souls. And with this feeling Daisy started to feel stupid and eventually said, "why don't we just ask the front desk what room they're in?"
The ducks headed to the lobby and went up to the lady at the front desk of the hotel.
"Hi," smiled Daisy.
"Hello, how may I help you?" Asked the lady.
"Could you tell us what room Mickey and Minnie Mouse are residing in, we're their cousins!" Donald stated.
"Oh you just missed them, they checked out five minutes ago, have a good one!"
The ducks charged out of the hotel and began running up and down the streets of Mouseton. They decided to all split up, Donald goes east, Daisy west, Mortimer North, and Ludwig South. The four of them ran down all of the streets and looked into each of the buildings, desperately looking for those mice. Hours were going by, and the ducks were getting worried that they weren't going to be running into Mickey and Minnie anytime soon, and that seeing them at the hotel and the idea of them killing them after seeing them there was too good to be true. But just as Daisy was about to walk into a bar to drink away her pain, out of the corner of her eye she saw those nasty mice. Daisy almost had a repeat of her scene in the hotel lobby, but took a deep breath and calmed herself down. Daisy crept over to where Mickey and Minnie were, and hid behind several garbage cans and alleyways to keep the mice from seeing them. She also kept her lips zipped, which was very hard because she really wanted to laugh at Mickey squeezing Minnie's ass cheeks, and Minnie wrapping herself around Mickey like a baby sloth slides in with his mama. Minnie was also lightly singing, or at least she thought she was. Instead she sounded like Yoko Ono getting raped by Rebecca Black. Daisy eventually had to put her mouth on the floor because she couldn't hold in her laugh anymore. She forgot just how retarded the mice were.
"Daddy I'm hungry again," Minnie said all sassy after she finally shut her vocal cords off.
"Princess, we'll eat in a few minutes," Mickey said.
"I don't want to eat in a few minutes retard, I want to eat now!" Minnie screamed.
Mickey punched Minnie across the face, sending her to the floor.
"Don't make me do that again, or I'll slit my own wrists!" Mickey said sobbing.
"I won't ask for food anymore," smiled Minnie.
She then jumped into his arms and they had a full on make out session in the middle of the sidewalk for all of Mouseton who was willing to look. The blood from the bloody nose Mickey gave her from the punch dripping all over his face. After a few minutes, Minnie eventually decided it was too hot out and took off her shirt, where she had the tightest bra the world had ever seen. Her nipples were so hard Daisy thought they would pop out of the bra. When a cop told her to put her shirt back on, Mickey grabbed the cop's gun and shot him in the face.
"Princess I will always always protect you!" Mickey said, punching her nipples.
"Thank you daddy!" Minnie pulled down Mickey's pants and performed fellatio on him.
Daisy followed Mickey and Minnie down the street, as they made out with each other, beat each other up, beat other people up, sang, and had a dance off. Mickey walking down the street in suicide mouse was less depressing. Eventually the mice ran into the road, opened the door to a car and yelled, "OUT!" at the driver, and then drove off in it.
"SHIT!" Daisy screamed.
Daisy ran up to the car and hopped into the back seat. The mice did not notice because they were too busy focusing on their amazing driving skills. Daisy almost regretted her decision of following the mice down because she quickly learned that Stephen Hawking could drive better. Mickey was driving the car with his feet because he felt like lounging, and with Minnie holding the engine down with her fist. Minnie's ass was also in Mickey's face and in this position Mickey decided to flip Minnie around and start eating her pussy. Minnie also never let go of the engine no matter what, so the car never stopped once it ended up slamming into what felt like every single car on the road. Minnie then sprayed perfume and smoked eighty cigarettes at once, which made the car smell just great. Daisy was on her hands and knees praying for her life while she was in this ride. The car's windows broke when it hit another, and glass flew onto Daisy, which she then had to painfully rip out of her flesh. One of the back tires flew right the fuck off, pushing the car backwards, and sending Daisy's face to the back of the car, breaking her nose. The car somehow was still going, and somehow the mice didn't even seem to notice what all was happening with all of the pussy licking going on up front. Although they did eventually notice when the car hit the back of another car and did a loop de loop onto another car, with Mickey and Minnie's car going upside down, and causing the two of them and Daisy to fall down. Mickey got out of the car, pushed it off of the other one, and kept on driving.
"YOU ARE SO STRONG!" Minnie screamed, "LET ME FEEL YOUR MUSCLES!"
Minnie jumped on top of Mickey, rubbed his muscles for a second, and then just started fucking him. At this point no one was driving the car, and it ended up driving off the road, into another building, then out the window of that building, onto a tree which it drove across, and then onto some power lines, and then down a waterfall, and then down a river which lead them to Minnie's moldy ass blue cheese house.
"WE'RE HERE!" Mickey and Minnie screamed in unison.
They hopped out of the car hand in hand, while Daisy fell out of the backseat and threw up everywhere.
"Ew, girl you are disgusting!" Minnie screamed at Daisy, who looked at Minnie all confused. The mice walked into Minnie's house, where Marcus was shoving a stick into his ass across the floor.
"Hi daddy," Minnie smiled.
"CUNT YOU STILL LIVE HERE?!" Marcus screamed.
"No, remember I moved in with Mickey, can't you remember anything you fucking retard?" Scolded Minnie.
"You all leave me, you and your dead mom!" Marcus screamed.
Suddenly Minnie's slut sister Mandie Mouse came walking out ass naked with the biggest tits Daisy had ever seen, slamming against the floor.
"When I got breast cancer I was so pissed about the double mastectomy, but I didn't realize I could get those new giant puppies, doctors feel so bad for you they'll do anything!" Mandie said.
Thirteen men then walked out and jumped onto Mandie, sucking and flinging around on her boobs like a jungle gym.
"Sis, I'm having a play date with these fellas, so you are watching my brats tonight!" Mandie said, pulling out Minnie's Huey, Dewey, and Louie rip offs Millie and Melody Mouse.
"I CAN NOT FUCKING WATCH THEM, MICKEY AND I ARE GOING!" Minnie yelled.
"Going where?" Asked Marcus.
"In celebration of our soon to be released masterpiece Steamboat Willie, Mr. Disney is sending us to Hawaii, and the reason I even dragged my ass to this dump is because I need money!" Minnie told Marcus.
"YOU SLIMY CUNT, YOU DON'T DESERVE MY MONEY!" Marcus yelled.
"YES I DO!"
Minnie and Mickey jumped onto Marcus's hillbilly ass and beat him until he had a stroke. They then snatched the wallet that was up his ass and began to walk out.
"YOU ARE WATCHING MY DAUGHTERS MINNIE!" Screamed Mandie.
"NO I AM NOT!" Screamed Minnie.
Minnie and Mickey each ripped off one of Mandie's tits and beat Mandie and Melody up with them until their bones were all broken.
"OW AUNT MINNIE HURT US!" Millie sobbed, Melody didn't say anything, as Minnie cut her tongue off the last time she babysat.
"LISTEN YOU CUNTS!" Mickey screamed, "MINNIE AND I ARE GOING TO HAWAII TOMORROW AND THAT IS FUCKING IT, SEE YA!"
"WHEN ARE YOU GOING!?" Asked Mandie, as blood gushed out of where her fake tits were and she tried to stop the bleeding by folding her arms against them.
"WE ARRIVE AT THE MOUSETON AIRPORT AT EIGHT!" Minnie yelled.
"THEN WATCH MILLIE AND MELODY UNTIL SEVEN THIRTY!" Mandie screamed.
"MILLIE AND MELODY CAN SUCK THEIR OWN UNDEVELOPED CLITS!" Minnie screamed.
"Minnie I am tired of you hick family, let's go to my house!" Mickey screamed.
"Good idea, let's go!"
Mickey and Minnie got into their car, but Daisy decided to just walk back to Mouseton. Once she arrived back, Daisy screamed as loud as she fucking could, "DONALD, LUDWIG, MORTIMER, GET THE FUCK OVER HERE!"
The ducks all got together and Daisy told them everything, how she ran into Mickey and Minnie, how they would be at the airport at eight in the morning, and how she was so fucking excited to murder them she could hardly take it. The ducks went back to their hotel room to discuss what they should do next.
"Okay so we go to the airport, we kidnap them, and then what, we take them here?" Asked Donald.
"I want it to be a bigger location, a location where we can have the most fun murdering them possible!"
"Where could that be?" Asked Ludwig.
"Well when I was driving in the car with Mickey and Minnie, we flew up into the sky and I could see a bunch of mountains that had caves in them, maybe those could work!" Daisy stated.
"A cave?" Mortimer asked.
"That might actually be good, let's check them out!"
The ducks ran out of the hotel and jumped into the nearest car they could.
"TAKE US TO THE FUCKING MOUNTAINS BITCH!" Ludwig screamed, pointing a gun at the driver's head.
"Okay," the driver sobbed.
The ducks were driven up into the mountains, and began looking at their options for potential murder spots. Some of the caves were too small, while others were a decent size. But the ducks still felt that they hadn't found the one yet. Until eventually the ducks walked into a cave that was absolutely perfect. It was dark, but not so dark that they couldn't see the magical time murders. It was huge, the cave looked like a fucking arena, built just for the beautiful show.
"It's going to happen here, I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED!" Daisy screamed.
"ME TOO!" Donald screamed.
Donald and Daisy then both fucked in the middle of the cave.
The ducks jumped back into their car and were driven back to the hotel. Once they got back into their room they decided to go over their murder plot for the final time.
"Okay so we kidnap them at the airport and then bring them to the cave where we murder them!" Donald said.
"You two can keep watch at the front of the cave to make sure they don't escape or that anyone else tries to help their cunt asses!" Daisy yelled.
"We don't get to murder them too!" Ludwig yelled.
"BITCH THIS WAS DONALD AND I'S PLAN IN THE FIRST PLACE, WE ARE BUTCHERING THEM!"
"I guess that's fair!" Mortimer stated.
"IT IS, BABY I AM SO EXCITED!" Donald screamed at Daisy.
That night the ducks partied again down in the ballroom at the hotel. They planned on partying until seven where they would sleep for thirty minutes to be well rested for their murders, although at around four, Donald and Daisy headed up to their room. They fucked onto their beautiful bed and then began drinking wrapped in each others arms.
"After a billion years we are finally going to murder those mice!" Daisy squealed.
"I couldn't have done it without you baby!" Donald said.
"Me neither, Donald tomorrow is going to be so beautiful!"
"And then we'll be the mascots of Disney!"
"I can't wait, no more me being the loser on none of the merchandise, I will run this company, and you will too, and it will be perfect!
"The Disney company will be truly perfect for the first time ever with us at the helm of it!"
"Steamboat Willie will be a trillion times better, all of the shorts will be a trillion times better!"
"All of the shorts will be, can you believe that cunt Walt only put me in eleven shorts and I was never the star outside of that one where you lose your memory and I want to shoot myself!"
"You deserved an Oscar for that performance!"
"I know, I'm gonna do fifty times the shorts now!"
"I can't wait for Walt to die and freeze himself too!"
"I know, that's when we really will get out of control!"
"Perfect control!"
"The merchandise, I can already see our faces on all of it!"
"You can't so much as step foot in a target without seeing our beautiful faces!"
"And it will be our faces all over Disney World, there will be Duck shaped waffles, and that stupid statue in front of the castle won't be Mickey and Walt, it will be us and Walt, and we'll also be bigger than him in the statue, we'll be bigger than anything in the world, we will be perfect, perfectly famous FOR THE REST OF TIME!"
"And the first step will be gutting those mice!"
The ducks fucked again and drifted off to sleep. At seven thirty the next morning, the ducks woke up, grabbed their bag of weapons, and gleefully headed out of the hotel. They forced another person to drive them to the airport and gleefully ran out. Thankfully since this was 1927, the airport was very small. There was just a booth to get your tickets and then the scary 1920s plane, that was much smaller than modern planes and really just looked like a pill capsule with wings. And with how small it was it was easy to spot two mice walking towards the plane.
"Here we go," Donald and Daisy giggled.
They walked up to the mice with a baseball bat and knocked them out. The ducks put the mice into body bags and put them in the back of the car.
"HOLY SHIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THEM?!" The driver screamed.
"Okay you might be a hindrance!" Donald stated, shooting the man in the back of the head.
Daisy gleefully took the wheel.
"READY TO GO?!" She giggled.
The ducks then drove up the mountain and then walked themselves and the mice into the cave for the greatest murder of all time.