The Original Ducksekeeter

Chapter 29: Dark and Underrated

The ducks were worried that they were gonna get in a lot of trouble for murdering Walt in fucking public with their faces on full display. But after the shock of the murder people ended up treating them like they were fucking war heroes or something. People were thrilled that Walt was finally dead. Of course everyone at the studio was happy but it turned out that everyone else in the world hated him too and that Donald and Daisy were the true reasons that they loved the studio so much. Donald and Daisy soon found out that the studio actually fell into hard times during the year they were living in that Motel 6, and that Walt was struggling to keep people interested in the projects with Donald and Daisy gone and he had to ride everything off of the excitement for Mary Poppins which was the only thing people were even slightly into. But now that he was dead and Donald and Daisy were back in the picture, people suddenly became much happier with the studio. None of the ducks even got arrested or anything, they were perfectly fine. There was only one problem.
"DONALD WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE GONNA DO NOW?!" Daisy screamed when they walked back into their house. Walt had burnt it down but Donald and Daisy with all of the money that they took from Walt after he died, which included the previous money that they had because he took it from them.
"What do you mean what are we gonna do now?!"
"Listen, we are amazing, but if there is one problem it's that we aren't incredibly good at making our own ideas for the studio!"
"That's not true!"
"Yes it is, Donald the only ideas we have ever come up with for the studio are things that already happened, and now we've used up Disneyland, the Mickey Mouse Club, and inventing TV, and after Walt originally died the company went to shit until the 90s!"
"You mean the Disney Renaissance?"
"Ew, don't talk like a Disney fan!"
"I'm not talking like a Disney fan!"
"I'm just kidding, but seriously what are we gonna do, all of the movies that come out in the next two decades are shit!"
"I always liked the Black Cauldron though, it's so underrated, and dark too!"
"Jesus Christ Donald you actually do talk like a Disney fan," Daisy rolled her eyes.
"Why can't we just make the 90s Disney movies now?"
"Because then we'll be out of content by the next decade!"
"Then we'll pull out Frozen quicker!"
"Donald I believe everything happens for a reason, we have to keep all of the movie's release dates at least somewhat close to when they originally came out, I even feel like the 50s were a bit lame without the announcement of Disneyland or the Donald and Daisy Duck Club happening then!"
"Okay fine, WAIT, ARE WE SPED..."
"YES!"
"WALT DISNEY WORLD!"
"OH FUCK DONALD THAT IS IT!"
Donald and Daisy called a meeting with everyone in the studio, but only the important people are going to talk.
"DAISY AND I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT WE ARE VERY EXCITED AND HONORED TO BE THE NEW CEOS OF THE STUDIO!"
Everyone cheered except for Mary Blair who was bitchy after her boy toy died.
"YOU TWO KILLED WALT!"
"AND I KILLED YOU!"
Goofy ran up to Mary Blair and slit her throat.
"Thanks Goofy!" Daisy smiled.
"OKAY SO ANYWAY, THE TWO OF US HAVE NOW CAME UP WITH A BRILLIANT IDEA!"
"What is it?" Everyone wondered.
"WALT DISNEY WORLD!" Donald and Daisy said together like they were cheerleaders.
"My name is Pete, is that going to be where we can shrink down and explore Walt's corpse?"
"Um, no Pete that is not what that is going to be, it's actually going to be like Disneyland, but much larger, and we will call it Walt Disney World in honor of his memory!"
Everyone began cheering more until Goofy spat out, "but you two killed him, why would you want to honor his memory!"
"Yes we thought about that, and we have decided that the reason the general public doesn't mind that killed Walt is because he had betrayed us, and if we make this beautiful new world in honor of him then that will look like we are forgiving him!"
"So do you forgive him?" Asked Clarabelle.
"Hell no we don't, he was a cunt," Daisy laughed.
"NOW LET'S START BUILDING IT!" Donald said, throwing out the blue prints. Like Disneyland, the two of them remembered pretty much the entire layout of the park because of how much they went.
"Wait where are we even putting this?" Asked the person that took the blueprint, Donald and Daisy are very progressive so they ditched all of Walt's slaves (which in theory seemed nice but now they had no jobs, were broke and homeless, and all killed themselves by the end of the month) and replaced them with white ones.
"Orlando, Florida!" They grinned.
"Ew, why there, it's so hot and gross!" Goofy complained.
"Because that's where Winona and Angelina are breaking out to go to!" Daisy explained.
Girl, Interrupted is Daisy's favorite movie.
"Okay so something else that Daisy and I have decided is that we will not make any new movies until 1989!"
"Why?"
"Because we want to give you all a chance to make some movies, specifically that people who are thinking about making the Aristocats, Robin Hood, Rescuers, Many Adventure of Winnie the Pooh, which is actually gonna be a bunch of shorts that Walt worked on tied together so I guess that doesn't count, Fox and the Hound, Black Cauldron, Great Mouse Decretive, and Oliver and Company, you can come up with those and we had nothing to do with it, I've never even heard of those movies, wait what were we even talking about!"
"Hey I have come up with the idea for a movie called the Aristocats!" Ken Anderson said.
"Oh my gosh that movie sounds interesting, okay who else has ideas for a new movie?" Asked Daisy.
When nobody else talked Donald and Daisy got a bit worried.
"Okay, anyone else, Goofy, Clarabelle, Roy Disney..."
"Roy Disney died in Vietnam!" Wolfgang Reitherman called out.
"Oh, let's also dedicate Walt Disney World to him, gang we have ate and left no crumbs today!" Daisy jumped for joy.
Robin Hood eventually did go into production along with the Aristocats. Donald and Daisy decided that since the next few movies would be coming out over the next two decades they should probably just be patient and let the retards who greenlit them make them. Even though they were pissed because they knew these movies weren't going to do as well as the ones of the past, they mostly just let it go and instead focused on making Walt Disney World. Okay well they didn't actually help in making it at all but they would at least watch the white slaves make it.
"I think us being in charge of everything is going pretty well!" Daisy said after the two fucked in the vault.
"Well I'll tell you this, I've had such a cozy and warm feeling inside me since Walt's death!"
"Oh my God me too, it's like I'm on top of the world or something, I mean don't get me wrong I didn't hate getting worshiped by him, but he was so damn annoying!"
"And retarded!"
"And racist!"
"And egotistical!"
"And abusive!"
"And smelled like so many cigars it made my nose bleed!"
"And violent!"
"And obsessive!"
"And pedophilic!"
"I'm just so happy his dumbass is dead!"
Donald and Daisy then shut their eyes and relived the sexy moment in their head when they shot Walt to death.
The next few months went beautifully. Donald and Daisy had nothing to do but live the lives as the most rich things ever. They didn't have to work on any movies, they now didn't even do the Donald and a Daisy Duck Club anymore, and they left the making of Disney World to others as well. The quote on quote Disney Dark Age was beautiful for them. Until the Aristocats came out.
"DONALD THIS MOVIE MADE HALF AS MUCH AS THE JUNGLE BOOK DID!"
"This is the Disney Dark Age after all, these movies aren't that big of hits!"
"DONALD WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE GONNA DO, THIS IS THE END OF THE STUDIO, THIS IS A CODE RED, WE NEED TO MAKE THE LITTLE MERMAID RIGHT NOW BEFORE THE ENTIRE COMPANY GOES TO SHIT!"
"The company is not gonna go to shit, if Mickey and Minnie could handle the Disney Dark Age we can too, and it's not like our money is going anywhere, Walt isn't in control of it anymore we are, so literally no one can steal it, well I guess someone could steal it but it would be very hard to do!"
"It's not just the money I'm worried about Donald, it's our reputation (Swifties can you believe that now I've said this and 1989 in this chapter?!)!"
"Our reputation is fine Daisy!"
"You don't know that, even Mickey and Minnie started getting some hate in the years after Walt died!"
"Well we aren't them, we are better, all they did in this period was that Christmas Carol thing and my Uncle was the star of that anyway, but we are gonna do more!"
"What?!"
"Well I was actually thinking about this last night, if we don't come up with ideas for the studio, we can instead come up with ideas for the world!"
"Donald, you are a genius!"
So over the next few years Donald and Daisy helped to end the Vietnam War, announced to the world about Watergate, found the Zodiac Killer, and made both Godfather movies with Paramount (mainly so Daisy could fuck Marlon Brando).
"WOW WE AMAZING!" Donald and Daisy squealed after doing all this.
Donald and Daisy got a lot of attention for doing these beautiful things and also decided that they were going to continue to keep it up until they won the Nobel Peace Prize.
"MOTHER TERESA AIN'T GOT SHIT ON US!" Daisy screamed.
So every single month they would do at least five things that made them look good, including giving to charities, visiting sick children, and making speeches about how much love they wanted to give the world. This paid off because Donald and Daisy received a huge amount of attention for this and the two of them almost felt more famous than they had ever been before. They were always popular and of course they were somewhat involved in the cause during World War II (even if Daisy's tune was a bit silly), but now there seemed to be a sweet and loving element to them that wasn't there before.
"THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE IS OURS THIS YEAR!" Donald and Daisy screamed while fucking in the vault.
However this turned out to be too good to be true because on October 10, 1973 Donald and Daisy found out that Henry Kissinger.
"WHO?!" Daisy screamed.
"YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME, AFTER ALL WE HAVE DONE FOR THE WORLD!" Donald screamed.
Donald threw a temper tantrum and began breaking a bunch of shit in the house in anger.
"It's fine, we'll win next year!"
"I don't want to win next year, I want to win NOW!"
"ME TOO, I AM GOING TO MURDER ALL THE NOBEL PRIZE PEOPLE!"
"BUT THEN WE CAN'T WIN NEXT YEAR!"
"I KNOW, THAT IS WHY THIS IS FUCKING DIFFICULT!"
Donald and Daisy sobbed profusely on the floor before getting up to drink whiskey.
"The whiskey isn't helping!" Daisy coughed.
"JUST KEEP DRINKING!"
The two of them downed three bottles of whiskey drunkenly passing out.
Over the next month Donald and Daisy were depressed over not winning the Nobel Peace Prize despite all of their beautiful work, however they became comfortable with fact that they would still have year after year of attempts to get it, and that a good thing was that now they had something that would make them strive to keep being all peaceful without hesitation.
"I bet we were in second place!" Daisy told Donald one night they were working at a soup kitchen for a bunch of disgusting hobos.
"Don't say that, I'll get even more upset!"
"Well I mean it as a good thing, if we were second this year then they might look to us before some of the new wannabe peacemakers!"
"I'm not getting my hopes up for anything though!"
"We are getting it next year, I can already taste it!"
"We better because I wanna take a break from this shit, because places like this soup kitchen make me wanna throw up!"
"Donald, that's rude, now go feed these broke bitches!"
Donald and Daisy were walking to their car when Daisy began yelling, "where are the damn keys!"
"I have them!"
"Why, do you not trust me with them?!"
"You gave them to me!"
"Oh yea... AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Daisy screamed suddenly and pointed up.
"WHAT?!"
Donald turned around to see a giant billboard with Daffy Duck's ugly face and anorexic body with big letters saying, "GHE DAFFY DUCK MOVIE, IN THEATERS NOVEMBER 8, WHICH IS THE DAY ROBIN HOOD COMES OUT, BUT THIS MOVIE IS BETTER SO GO SEE IT!"
"SINCE FUCKING WHEN IS HE MAKING A MOVIE?!" Daisy screamed.
"SINCE NOW!" Daffy screamed.
"WHERE THE FUCK, NEVER MIND, DAFFY THIS ISN'T FAIR!"
"OH NO IT ISN'T, WELL SORRY BUT IT'S HAPPENING CUNT!"
"You'll be sorry, releasing this the same day as the new Disney movie is a horrible decision, our movies are always successful!" Donald yelled.
"The Aristocats only did okay, but I can tell that the Disney studio is taking a bit of a tumble following Walt's passing, and that's what got me thinking, if the Aristocats made that much money with no competition then how much money would the next non-Walt Disney movie make with competition, and not just any competition, I'm talking Daffy Daddy Duck competition!"
"You can't do this!" Daisy sobbed.
"Well that's a stupid thing to say considering that I have, well anyway bye now," Daffy then put on a grin and said, "oh and sorry about the Nobel Peace Prize, I really thought you'd get it!"
"I'LL PUT MORE RAPE ALLEGATIONS AGAINST YOU!"
"THIS IS THE 70s, RAPE IS VERY HIP NOW, AND NOT TO MENTION BLAXPLOITATION MOVIES ARE VERY IN THESE DAYS, SO GOOD LIKE CRACKERS!"
Donald and Daisy ran into their bedroom and sobbed on the bed like little girls before pulling the whiskey back out.
WELL THINGS ARE STARTING TO FUCKING SUCK FOR US!" Donald screamed.
"YOU DON'T THINK DAFFY'S MOVIE WILL CAUSE ANY PROBLEMS DO YOU!"
"UM NO, I THINK IT WILL CAUSE A LOT OF FUCKING PROBLEMS, ANOTHER MOVIE HAS NEVER OPENED AGAINST A DISNEY MOVIE, THE FACT THAT DAFFY IS DOING THIS SHOWS THAT THE COMPANY IS GOING BAD!"
"OH GOD I HATE THIS DARK AGE, YOU KNOW THAT IS PROBABLY WHY WE DIDN'T GET THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE, BECAUSE WE ARE IN A DARK AGE AND EVERYONE HATES US!"
"OH GOD YOU MIGHT HAVE A POINT!"
"OF COURSE I DO, I AM SMART!"
"BUT WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO ABOUT THIS DAFFY SITUATION, ARE WE JUST GOING TO LET BOTH MOVIES COME OUT!"
"WE COULD CHANGE THE RELEASE DATE!"
"NO FUCKING WAY, IF WE MOVE THE RELEASE DATE THAT WOULD MAKE US LOOK LIKE A BUNCH OF PUSSIES!"
"OKAY THEN WE WILL JUST KEEP THE RELEASE DATE, and let's calm down, maybe Daffy's movie won't do well anyway!"
Y'all it did well.
"DONALD I HAVE GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS ABOUT ROBIN HOOD'S BOX OFFICE!"
"Oh God!"
"The good news is that it broke a box office record for a Disney movie, the bad news is that the record is being the only Disney movie to not open at number one!"
Donald and Daisy got in their car and drove up to Daffy's house where he was throwing a party with all the Looney Tunes.
"Uh, I don't remember you two getting invited!"
"WE WEREN'T INVITED, BUT WE ARE HERE TO KICK YOUR ASS!" Donald yelled.
Donald and Daisy's hope was that they would all get scared but instead the Looney Tunes all began laughing in their faces before jumping on top of them and attacking them. Roadrunner pecked the duck's faces until blood spilled out, while Speedy Gonzales crawled up their clothes biting them.
"DONALD I DON'T LIKE IT WHEN MEXICANS FEEL ME UP!'"
"CHICOS YOU TASTE GOOD!" Speedy Gonzales screamed.
Just as Roadrunner finished pecking the Duck's faces, Tweety pecked them both in the eyes. The two lost vision for a few seconds, during which time Foghorn Leghorn body slammed Daisy to the ground and Granny raped Donald.
"EW YOUR VAGINA HAS DROPPED SO FAR DOWN ITS HIT THE CENTER OF THE EARTH!" Donald screamed.
"Hey at least I got my boobs done, check 'em out!" Granny screamed before shoving her tits in Donald's mouth.
Donald and Daisy then began getting slapped multiple times by Michigan J. Frog's cane, breaking bones in their body and giving them many bruises.
"BITCH I SUPPORTED YOU THROUGH SEVEN YEARS OF GILMORE GIRLS COMMERCIAL BREAKS!" Daisy screamed.
Suddenly Wile. E Coyote unleashed his claws and jumped from behind, scratching gashes all over their bodies, turning their cracker bodies blood red.
"BRING OUT THE TASMANIAN DEVIL!" Daffy screamed.
The Tasmanian Devil ran out of a cage that popped out of nowhere and began mutilating Donald and Daisy while screaming a bunch of bullshit.
"GET THIS AUTISTIC THING OFF OF ME!" Daisy screamed.
Once that thing got off of them, Donald and Daisy finally were able to slightly stand on their feet.
"Is that all you got!" Donald asked all tough, while his wing fell off of his fucking body.
"OH FUCK I HOPE!" Daisy screamed.
"One more thing!" Daffy grinned, before running up to Donald and kicking him right in the testicals.
"OH MY FUCKING GOD!" Donald gasped.
"PORKY GET YOUR STUTTERING ASS OUT HERE!" Daffy ordered.
"Thethe thisthis isis meanmean," Porky stated.
"I WILL FUCKING EAT YOU!"
"OH SHIT OKAY!" Porky then ran up and kicked Daisy in the clitoris.
Donald and Daisy both then fell to the floor and passed out.
Daffy drove the ducks to the hospital and told the paparazzi outside that he saved them from a group of child molestors who thought they were little kids.
"Wow even when his movie opens better he doesn't let that get in his head and still respects them!" A news reporter who Donald and Daisy were listening to from their hospital beds said.
There were two radios on both of the duck's bedside tables. They tried to get rid of both of them but neither could move nor could they talk since Michigan hit them in the throat really hard with his cane and there was a lot of internal bleeding, so the radios had to stay. Thankfully listening to the radio allowed the ducks to hear all the amazing news about Daffy's movie making a ton of money and how Robin Hood was quickly becoming Disney's lowest grossing movie, even without adjusting for inflation for film bros who look at it that way. The company was completely going to shit since Donald and Daisy were now in charge of nothing. It was now in the hands of Goofy because he is the second most successful in the studio, although Donald and Daisy would not have let this slide if they weren't essentially comatose, but even then they had no clue who they would even pick because they are just so perfect. Goofy didn't do jack shit and he didn't allow anyone to help him because he is the boss, outside of Clarabelle who would "help out" sometimes. Thankfully it wasn't too much longer before Donald and Daisy regained the ability to talk and so Goofy no longer had to run the studio. He got very angry about this and marched up to the hospital to yell at Donald and Daisy.
"HOW DARE YOU FIRE ME, I AM THE BOSS, I FIRE YOU!"
"Goofy you were only the boss for like a month, shut up!" Daisy said as well as she could.
"I HAVE NEVER FELT MORE BETRAYED, YOU KNOW WHAT, I QUIT!"
"AND I QUIT TOO!" Clarabelle popped out of Goofy's pants and yelled.
"Shit you two can't quit, you make us money!" Donald coughed.
"WELL NOW MONEY IS GONNA RUN MY JOYFULNESS!"
"Goofy, why can the two of us still talk more coherently than you?" Asked Daisy.
The company did better with Donald and Daisy in charge again, since now there was no longer Goofy making dirty changes to the Rescuers. Donald and Daisy removed all of the scenes of the mice smoking crack, and a four way involving the two mice, the little girl, and the bird. But Donald and Daisy didn't catch the topless woman during the flying scene or the part when the little girl takes her shirt off. Donald and Daisy also put out some false advertising about Robin Hood, saying that there was a hot new sex scene between Robin Hood and the lady fox added so that the furries of the 70s would buy a ticket. This did get the box office to go up for a second but word soon spread that it was a bunch of bullshit and the movie ended up continuing to get fucked up by Daffy's movie. Although it wasn't like Donald and Daisy were leaving anytime soon to return to the studio. In fact, the two of them had to spend an entire year at the hospital before finally making a full recovery. This meant that there was no humanitarian or peacemaking works that they could take part in, which meant no Nobel Peace Prize that year either.
The second they got home from the hospital Donald yelled, "okay we got to lock in, the Nobel Peace Prize needs to be ours this year!"
That week Donald and Daisy traveled to every single country in the world, took pictures with a bunch of poor and sick kids, made speeches about how war is bad and shit, gave billions of dollars to charities, the works.
"If we keep this up every single week we have to win the Nobel Peace Prize!" Daisy stated.
The ducks did not stop, there was no time to lose, they had to become the absolute epitome of peace and they had to win the Nobel Peace Prize. They kept this up every single week until the end of the year. On a dark October day Donald and Daisy waited to hear news about the Nobel Peace Prize since they knew that the winner would be announced.
"It's not gonna be us," Donald sobbed.
"YES IT IS!" Screamed Daisy.
"We would have gotten a letter or phone call or some shit beforehand if we won!"
"How do you know!"
"I don't know, I just assume that's how it happens!"
"We are here to announce the winner of the 1975 Nobel Peace Prize..." Some cunt news reporter on the TV began to say.
"SSSSHHHHHHHHH!" Daisy whispered even though Donald literally did not talk.
"Andrei Sakharv..."
Daisy grabbed a baseball bat and slammed the TV multiple times until it broke before her and Donald began screaming violently.
"BITCH SOME FUCKING RUSSIAN!" Donald screeched.
"I AM BOMBING HIS HOUSE!" Daisy threw up.
"WHO EVEN IS THIS BITCH?!"
"BETTER THAN US APPARENTLY!"
"NO HE IS NOT, WE ARE THE GREATEST FUCKING PEOPLE SLASH DUCKS SLASH CREATURES ON THIS FUCKING PLANET AND NOBODY WORKS AS HARD AS US AND NOBODY DOES AS MANY PEACEFUL SHIT AS US AND NOBODY DESERVES THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE MORE THAN US!"
"HOW COULD WE LOSE I MEAN WE DID EVERYTHING, FUCKING EVERYTHING!"
"DAFFY, IT'S DAFFY!"
"WHAT ABOUT DAFFY!?"
"I DON'T KNOW YET, BUT HE IS BEHIND THIS SOMEHOW!"
"IT'S BECAUSE HE IS BECOMING MORE FAMOUS THAN US, WE ARE NOTHING NOW BECAUSE OF HIM!"
"OR HE IS CONVINCING THE PEOPLE AT NOBEL PRIZE TO NOT VOTE FOR US!"
"I BET THAT'S IT!"
Donald and Daisy snuck out of their house but knew they had to be sneaky so that Daffy wouldn't see them coming and send them back to the hospital. So they went into the sewers and snuck into Daffy's house through his toilet, but unfortunately Daffy was using it so Donald stuck his head right up his anus. I'm just kidding, Daffy was not using it, so Donald and Daisy snuck through the toilet and ran into Daffy's bedroom pointing machine guns at him.
"GET THE FUCK OUT!"
"WHAT DID YOU SAY TO THEM!" Daisy roared.
"WHO!?"
"DON'T PLAY DUMB WITH US!" Donald stomped.
"TRUST ME IF I DID SOMETHING TO PISS YOU OFF I WOULD LET YOU KNOW!"
"So you didn't convince the Nobel Peace Prize choosers to not... nevermind!"
Donald and Daisy ran back home but were practically even more pissed off because now they realized the Nobel Prize assholes just didn't think they were peaceful enough.
"What fucking more do we need to do, die on the cross!?" Daisy screamed and pulled out a hammer and nails.
"I don't fucking know anymore!"
"Or maybe we are looking at this all wrong, maybe we are trying to hard, I mean we worked every single fucking week of the year, people probably got sick of us, even Princess Diana would have told us to shut the fuck up, this year let's tame it down but not so much that we don't win of course!"
"Good idea, we are winning this year, I can taste it!"
One year later.
"BITCH I AM GOING TO MURDER THE NOBEL PRIZE PEOPLE!"
The year after that.
"WE JUST NEED A NEW STRATEGY!"
The following year.
"They're just trying to piss us off!"
Year after fucking year Donald and Daisy lost the Nobel Peace Prize and in 1984 they decided to finally give up after a full decade of failure.This was also the first time that they looked at the studio during this time closely and the two of them quickly realized that everything there was becoming pretty shitty. None of the movies were doing as well, the theme parks were losing more attraction, and Donald and Daisy were just happy they were getting none of the blame for this since they were busy being peacemakers. Thankfully this was just the right time for Donald and Daisy's Christmas Carol to release, where all the classic characters starred in the classic roles. Donald and Daisy took full credit for the perfect casting of Scrooge as Scrooge, and Scrooge happily did it because of money. Similarly, Goofy happily returned to the studio to make it with the promise of money, after he had been living on the streets as a drug addict who spent all of his previous dough on coke in a span of twenty minutes following his resignation. Donald and Daisy's Christmas Carol did very well and became the most successful thing from the company since Walt's assassination.
"It's because we made it," Donald stated when an interviewer asked why he and Daisy thought it did so well compared to other projects.
"You know we've been so busy being the nicest people in the world, but it is nice to return to the studio that we run from time to time!" Daisy grinned.
The next year Donald and Daisy were also able to have the company go into someone else's hands for a second, even if they still were the heads. This person was Michael Eisner who both Donald and Daisy fell in love with. He was so tall and built and sexy and he was such a dumbass that everyone just assumed now any bad thing that happened at the studio was because of him and that the duck's had nothing to do with it at all. Michael Eisner in the original timeline was the CEO of Disney, but Donald and Daisy were not gonna let that slide so they made him WANNABE CEO instead, a title which he didn't mind at all. Also this helped when the studio had the biggest disaster in its history. The Black Cauldron. Donald and Daisy remembered when this shitty movie bombed originally, but to be honest Donald and Daisy actually were stoned throughout the original 1970s and 1980s. It was actually their favorite time at the studio because Walt was dead and Mickey and Minnie were losing their shit trying to run everything without his help. So the two of them actually didn't remember just how horrible the Black Cauldron did, but bitch it did bad. Only three emo kids showed up opening weekend, leading to a total weekend box office of $2, because this was how much a ticket cost back then and only one of the kids paid the other two snuck in. And since the Black Cauldron's budget was $1,000,000, this meant that the studio went into Chapter Seven Bankruptcy. Everyone in the studio lost all their money, outside of Donald and Daisy who threatened to murder people at the bank, and Scrooge who just always seems to have a lot of money. Many employees fucking killed themselves, and now hardly any movies could be made because the studio pretty much went under. But on a positive note the three kids loved it, saying they enjoyed how dark it was and that they felt it was very underrated.
"DONALD THIS IS A CODE FUCKING RED, AND THAT RED IS ARIEL'S HAIR, LITTLE MERMAID IS GOING INTO PRODUCTION RIGHT FUCKING NOW!" Daisy screamed.
"I hope it's not too late!" Donald worried.
"It worked before so it can work again, but it's still going to take four years and I guess the studio is going to have to lean on mouse Sherlock Holmes and dog Billy Joel for now!"
"I think the Great Mouse Detective is underrated honestly!"
"Oh dear Lord, oh hey can you get the mail, I just wanna make sure they aren't coming for the house yet!"
Donald walked outside to get it and screamed so loud the earth shook.
"OH MY GOD WHAT IS IT?!" Daisy screamed.
"IT'S A LETTER FROM THE NOBEL PRIZE!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Daisy shrieked.
"Is everyone all right!" The police force drove up and asked.
"GET OUT, HOLY FUCK DONALD OPEN THE LETTER RIGHT NOW!"
Donald tore it open and Daisy ran over so the two of them could read it.