Dying Embers

Chapter Twenty Six

Chapter Twenty Six: And then, I waited

"You're just overthinking it, Rain."

Jilliana and I were sitting on a bench, and I'd just finished telling her everything that happened last night—every detail, every word. But after all of that, those were the only words she gave me. I knew I might be overthinking things, but that wasn't what I needed to hear. I needed the truth. I wanted answers, something to ease this anxious, restless feeling growing inside me. He hadn't called or texted since, and the longer I went without hearing from him, the deeper the frustration burrowed. I couldn't keep it to myself any longer.

I trusted Chance so much. So much. But can you really blame me for feeling this way? It's like there's a thorn lodged deep in my heart that I can't pull out. I don't even know what this is, only that it hurts.

"Didn't you try calling him?" she asked, breaking the silence.

Umiling ako. Hindi na rin ako makapag-salita sa daming iniisip. I can't even focus. My mind keeps going back to that call, replaying it over and over. What happened after he hung up? Why did he sound so rushed? Why does he feel so distant lately? I know he's busy with practice—fine. But the way he spoke to me last night, he was so cold, so detached.

"Earth to Rain!" Jilliana snaps her fingers in front of me, jolting me back to reality. I blink, realizing I've been completely lost in my own thoughts.

"Seriously, you're overthinking this. You know Chance. He's not the type to suddenly get close to other girls. You're his first girlfriend, remember? And he's completely crazy about you."

I let out a long sigh. I know. I know that all too well.

"I just can't help but worry," I admitted. "He hasn't talked to me since he ended the call."

"What if ikaw ang tumawag sa kaniya?"

"He's busy, Jilliana."

She shrugged. "Well, there's no harm in you making the first move."

I kept replaying Jilliana's words in my head, letting them sink in. I get it. But I just hate feeling like I'm the one chasing him, like I'm somehow clingy or needy. I don't want to come across as that kind of girlfriend—the one who can't seem to live without her boyfriend constantly around. I know there's nothing wrong with making the first move, but I don't want to be a distraction. I want him to focus on his training. And I trust him.

I really do. I know he loves me, and that should be enough.

Jilliana and I finally got to class. A few minutes later, our teacher walked in, holding a workbook. Great, looks like we're getting an actual lesson today instead of another worksheet. I tried to focus as she started the discussion, but it was useless. Not a single thing she was saying was registering in my mind. I kept my gaze fixed forward, watching her go over the material, but my thoughts were somewhere else entirely. They were with Chance.

I just want to talk to him. To ask him.

There are so many questions racing through my mind, and the frustration is building, each thought weighing on me more than the last. It's becoming hard to hold back. I just want to see him. I want to be with him. God, I miss him so much.

Good thing the teacher only discussed the lesson without calling on anyone to recite; if she had, I wouldn't have had anything to say anyway.

Natapos ang klase. Vacant period namin sa susunod na oras. Napabuntong-hininga ako bago ko tiningnan ang cellphone ko, pero wala pa ring message na galing kay Chance. I don't know how to keep myself busy at this point.