Double Sided Tracks

Flashback-Max

2027-Qatar 

Max felt floaty and it wasn't because he secured his title less than one hour ago, it was because he saw Nora. In all her glory, sporting a tiny bump.

Something crawling and choking Max when it truly dawned on him that she made an appearance in the place that she was once avoiding in the name of protecting his feelings. Does she think he's okay? That he's recovered? That he won't feel anything seeing her standing in front of him, living the life of what could've been theirs.

He quickly changed out of the sticky fireproof, aftermath of winning in Qatar. It's not even champagne and oh how Max wished he could have alcohol right now. He needs to be drunk.

Max ignored Lewis' presence during post-race press con, he simply could not be fucking bothered to hide how he'd rather look down instead of anywhere else. Then he made the mistake of catching a glimpse of the silver ring around Lewis' ring finger and he felt like setting the entire circuit on fire, just to release his anger.

He quickly stood up and walked away before anyone could catch him, "Max!" he could hear Lewis called after him, he walked even faster while shoving the long straw inside his mouth. Playing dumb, pretending to be busy.

They were in some random corridor when Lewis caught up to him, "hey man," Lewis greeted with an awkward smile. "Nora mentioned–" at which Max fully stopped and looked up to Lewis, "that you guys spoke, she seemed so happy about it so I just wanted to thank–"

Fuck this bullshit. Way to rub it in, yeah I'm Lewis Hamilton and my wife is so happy so I took the liberty to thank you. Fuck you.

"You don't have to thank me," he cut Lewis off abruptly. Lewis looked at him with slight confusion then Max truly lost it. "Yeah, you don't have to fucking thank me." He repeated, Lewis looked slightly shocked at that but regained his composure. Both hands in his pocket, slightly raised his chin. Like some Alpha bullshit, challenging Max.

Max will put his head into the fucking barrier, if he wanted to all those years ago.

"Do you still love her?" Lewis asked, genuinely. It wasn't accusatory, the way he asked has the same tone as Brad asking if Max had his smoothie yet. So fucking casual.

Max scoffed, looked around to make sure no one was there as a viewer. "Are you fucking insane?"

Lewis raised both of his palms, like surrendering. "Hey- I just thought I'd ask–"

Oh, Lewis thought Max would deny it. "No, are you fucking serious for asking that?" Max said, "of course I still fucking love her, Lewis. She was almost my wife." Max said curtly.

All "cool guy" demeanor was dropped, Lewis truly looked taken aback. Max isn't sure why, maybe since it's been a long time or maybe because Lewis is a fucking asshole who can't wrap his head around the fact that someone else can love what is his so deeply.

"You don't deserve her." Max started, "you don't fucking deserve her. You broke her, I was the one who picked her up." He wanted to say he was the one who picked up the pieces that Lewis broke but English is escaping him.

Lewis scoffed at that, face went all angry. Good. Max wanted to hurt him. But, they're not racing drivers if they don't know how to push the limits. Not knowing when to stop. "Well, she's my wife now." Lewis said with a smile.

That hurted like a bitch, because yes, at the end of the day. She is not Max's wife. But, Jos' blood is still in his bloodline so he knows how to press where it hurts. He laughed at Lewis, "You have to remember that I lost her because of someone else's mistake, you lost her once because of yourself. You are the ticking time bomb, Lewis." Max said and walked away.

He walked into his motorhome seething with anger, the type that he hasn't felt in so long. He was so angry that he launched his water bottle into the glass table and of-fucking-course it shattered. As if this isn't a multi-million dollar motorhome. He laughed hysterically and dropped himself on the ground, drawing his knees in so his head rested between his knees.

"Max?" he heard someone say, sounds like Daniel. "Maximus?" That's when he looked up to find Daniel standing here with a can of beer and a little party hat on top of his curls.

He looked so ridiculous that Max had to laugh so hard that it turned into dry-heaving sobs.

Without saying anything, Daniel kneeled beside him and brought him into one of those body crushing hugs. "It's ok, Max." Daniel repeats like a mantra.

But, nothing is ok. The room is spinning even though he has 0% alcohol in his blood, he lost the love of his life, and seeing her there tonight just sealed it for him. That he has lost her forever. "She was supposed to be my wife." Max said before letting out another sobs. He's aware how childish that sounded, almost like "it was supposed to be my turn!" when he and Vic were playing when they were little.

Daniel exhaled, "I know, I'm sorry, Max."

Max is sorry too.