'Woman (hey). Tempted, you know
Apologies are never gonna fix this. I'm empty, I know And promises are broken like a stich is'
A Tim Bradford/The Rookie fan fiction
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**
The nursery was a symphony of soft yellows and beige tones, bathed in the gentle afternoon light. Addy, her belly a prominent curve beneath her loose t-shirt, meticulously folded a tiny onesie. Their baby girl, Ellie was due any day, and the anticipation hung thick in the air. It was a mixture of anxiety and excitement for them.
Her baby, nestled deep within her belly, shifted, a gentle flutter that was both familiar and miraculous. Addy looks down at her belly "She's got the hiccups again," she murmured, tilting her head to the side as if listening intently.
Tim, leaning against the doorframe, pushed off with a sigh. "She's going to be a great kicker on a football team." He says with a light laugh. He tried to inject lightness into his voice, but the underlying tension was a persistent hum beneath the surface.
Addy's smile softened. "Maybe. Or maybe a surfer like her mama" she says to him. The last few weeks have been flying by. Addy and Tim have been doing everything they can for the babies arrival. From eating spicier foods, bouncing on a ball, and bouncing on something else. Which Tim enjoyed very well.
Tim stepped further into the room, his eyes sweeping over the meticulously folded clothes, the carefully chosen books, the rocking chair that seemed to beckon them both. He knew he should be feeling the same joyous anticipation that radiated from Addy, but a knot of worry tightened in his chest. He was a cop, a creature of routine and controlled chaos. This was different. This was raw and unpredictable, and it scared him more than any call ever had.
He moved closer, placing a hand on Addy's belly his touch tentative. "You okay?"
"Just tired," she admitted, leaning into his touch. "And a little bit impatient. Ready to meet her."
"Me too," he says, the word catching in his throat. He was ready to meet her, yes, more than anything. But he was also terrified of the "how." The "when." The what-ifs that had taken up residence in his mind.
He was a cop, not a midwife. He wasn't supposed to be pacing the station, his radio squawking in his ear while his wife went into labor. He was supposed to be by her side, holding her hand, maybe even awkwardly coaching her through contractions. What if she went into labor while he was out on patrol, miles away? What if he couldn't get back in time?
These thoughts were a constant barrage, each one a punch to his gut. He'd started bringing his go-bag home every night, checked the gas tank in his truck compulsively, even practiced breathing exercises in his patrol car during slow shifts earning him some curious looks from Lucy.
