Link & Champions Group Chat

Radioactive Bananas

( Paya is back online)

( Purah is back online )

Purah: So you're sure? Positively positive of what you heard? On the name of your mother that-

Paya: Yes... aunty...

Purah: And have you told Impa about this?

Paya: Not yet... she would freak out over this news

Purah: I'll tell her myself then!

Paya: No!!! Grandma would...

Purah: I know my sister well enough Paya. Don't fret over it.

Purah: This is of extreme importance. If we cannot contain it, Rhoam will have to hear about it instead.

Paya: ....

Purah: It's settled then. I'm tagging my sister to inform her.

@Impa

Purah: Give it a few snaps and clicks...

( Impa is back online )

Purah: And there she is!

Paya: Hi grandma....

Impa: Purah. Paya. Why was I pinged so late?

Impa: ....

Impa: Why are we the only ones online?

Purah: Well, you see sis, this has to do with the Yiga 🤫

Impa: Go on...

Purah: So you know how they have a weird...

Paya: Fantasy?

Purah: Fetish. Weird fetish with bananas

Impa: Strange. But go on.

Purah: They're weaponizing them against Hyrule

Impa: ....

Impa: What.

Purah: Look, sis, I know this might sound crazy but-

Impa: It's three in the morning.

Paya: But our scouts just found out about this! The Gerudo have also been briefed!

Impa: Paya sweetheart, how can bananas be possibly used as weapons? I mean, they're effective against those idiots when you're in a pinch, but against anyone else?

Purah: They're radioactive

Impa: ...

Impa: Can you try to break the news down slower rather than blurting everything out?

Purah: I said what I said.

Paya: It quite literally is what she says

Impa: Okay I'll bite. What is it this time?

Purah: So you know how bananas are slightly radioactive?

Impa: That is so insignificant that it doesn't even matter.

Purah: Well Kogha managed to forcefully combine several thousand bananas together to create one singular radioactive banana.

Impa: And...?

Purah: Then he did the same for another

Impa: So two...

Paya: And then he combined them together

Impa: Dear Hylia.

Paya: And now he has several of them in one bunch....

Purah: Our sources tell us that they plan to send one to each major settlement in Hyrule, mostly noticeably Gerudo Town and Hyrule Castle. One bananas is enough to infect and kill everyone.