Funny Comebacks

36: Innocent Mother

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Chapter 36

1) I heard my daughter moaning, I think she stubbed her toe again.

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2) Lying in bed and all I can hear is vibrating from my daughter's room, must be her phone. She's a popular girl!

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3) Why does my son always talk about getting high? I can't stand heights myself, don't know where he gets it from!

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4) I overheard my daughter got 'fingered' in the back of the class. Damn kids and their school games! I'd wish she'd concentrate more!

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5) I keep finding all this white powder in my son's room! Damn sugar! He sure loves his cooking!

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6) Found a naked guy in my daughter's bed. He said he was poor and had no clothes. My daughter is so charitable and generous!

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7) My daughter told me she passed her pregnancy test. I'm so glad I have clever kids!

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8) Why do all my son's friends keep telling my they want to give me a cream pie? I'm on a diet for goodness sake.

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9) Sick of all these white stains in my son's underwear, no more sandwiches in his underwear for him!

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10) I overheard my son tell his girlfriend he's going to come. I wonder where he's going!

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