The Dick Diaries: Kaiba Seto

September 29, 2015

Dear Koa leaf,

Ugh, it's hard to write on your brittle ass.

Well, I suppose it's not your ass, per say, more like your torso, or your arm or...

WTF, I am discussing leaf limbs.

Forget it.

I'll just give you the gist of what has been happening to me today.

Joey told me he was here to support Serenity on her quest to help the baby monkeys or dolphins or whatever.

I stopped listening after "Hey, Kaiba, what are you doing here?"

Bandit Keith got dragged off by a bunch of hawaiian sumo wrestlers, I guess?

Either way they were packing with the leis.

May I note that Noah and Mokuba called me on my cellphone and told me they would leave me there because, "You need stress relief big brother!" and "It'll be good for you!"

And even the occasional random remarks from Noah, such as...

"Hey, Mokuba, have you seen my Star Wars action figures?"

"Mokuba, did you let the goat in again?"

and

"I think it's eating Seto's laptop."

I screamed.

-Seto Kaiba

(P.S. When I go home, I'm making goat stew.)