Something Infinite

Chapter 12

Harry's POV

Untangling myself from Jen's soft warm limbs, was the worst step in preparing for my impending departure this morning. I expected to sleep in solitude last night, since she hadn't shown any desire in being close to me since returning home from the hospital.

I figured it would hurt less to leave her if I distanced myself, rather than be rejected of her affection for another night. Maybe getting used to not having her in my arms would prepare me better for the month ahead, was my thought when turning my back to her for the first time in our relationship.

She took me by surprise when she touched me. The affection I had been craving from her was finally being received, and I wondered if this was a turning point. When she said she wanted to be close to me because it was my last night, it made me question if this was a final goodbye, a way for her to get closure and say her farewell to me.

I only relaxed when she told me her reasoning behind her change of heart, and she promised me again she wouldn't leave me. All words I'd heard before, only to be left devastated on the other side of the world. All I could do was trust her, and believe in us enough to know we would be fine no matter where in the world I was.

Losing her was painful, but losing both her and my daughter would be a pain I would never recover from, and hoped I would never have to endure. All my faith and trust was in her now, I didn't want to be insecure in my relationship, but with the way things were the last few days, I couldn't help but be apprehensive.

Throughout the night we took turns in attending to Mia, and every time one of us returned to bed, Jen would re attach herself to me, holding on like she didn't want to let me go. Laying here, knowing I had to get dressed and leave in twenty minutes, was growing harder by the second to leave the bed.

I gently pulled Jen's arm off my torso, slowly sliding out from under her. I didn't want to wake her, because having to say goodbye to her wasn't how I wanted to leave. I would crumble, I wouldn't want to walk out the door, and I would stay. She wanted me to go and focus on myself, and I had respect that.

I dressed myself for the flight, and dragged my bags out to the front foyer. There were only two things I had to do before I left- say goodbye to my daughter, then say goodbye to Jen as quickly as I could without waking her.

I made my way upstairs to my daughter's room, opening up quietly so she didn't wake and give her mum a hard time once I left. She was tucked into her little white sheets, with her mouth slightly opened like Jen when she slept.

This time last year I would never have even dreamt this is where my life would be at right now. I no longer had a girlfriend, I was miserable, and I certainly wasn't planning on having a child. I was happy with where life ended up taking me, and I wouldn't change a single part of it, because it all lead to this.

"I love you angel, daddy will be home soon," I leant down, kissing my baby's forehead. I spotted the blanket we wrapped her in, hanging off the side of the crib. Jen would probably kill me, but I took it out of the room with me to take to London. It smelt like Mia, and it would be a comfort to me when I was missing her.

"Oi Haz," Angus whispered from his bedroom door when I reached the stairs.

"What are you doing up? It's five in the morning," I whispered back, walking over to him.

"Your sister snores like a f*cking chimney, and I've had a restless night. If I don't get to sleep before her, there's no chance of me getting some shut eye," he rubbed his face. The guy looked tired, and I could hear my sister from where I was standing, the situation was a little amusing, it lightened the mood a little.