Our life together (Woozi x reader) Book 2

Chapter 17

Woozi POV
Today is Si Ahn's 1st birthday! I'm so excited! "Si Ahn!" I say with a smile as I sit on the floor. Si Ahn looks at me and smile which made me laugh. "Your too cute." I say. "Come here!" I tell him. He was about a foot away and I wanted to try to get him to walk. He's been doing good but at times he'll fall since his balance isn't the best yet. "Oh Oh OH!" I scream with a smile on my face. Si Ahn walked all the way over to me. "Good job buddy!" I exclaimed,  standing up with Si Ahn in my arms. "What's all the commotion about?" I heard (Y/n) ask. "Si Ahn walked all the way from there to me!" I say point at where he had been standing before. "Dae Bak! Good job Si Ahn." She said kissing him on the head. "Where's Sang hee at?" I ask. "She's in the kitchen making noodle art." (Y/n) told me. "Ah..." I said with a small laugh. "Umma! Appa! Look look! I made Si Ahn!" Sang hee said coming up to us with a stick figure on paper made out of noodles. "That's awesome Sang hee! How about you make Nana?" (Y/n) says with a smile and Sang hee runs off to go make Nana out of noodles. I smiled and sat down on the couch with (Y/n), while Si Ahn was sitting on the floor playing with some toys. "So what are we going to do for his birthday?" I asked. "Probably just get together with the guys and our families. Does that sound okay?" (Y/n) asked. "It sounds great." I told her burying my head into her shoulder. "What's up with you today?" She asked with a light laugh. "Nothing. I just love you." I said, putting my arms around her waist. I missed her so much when I was gone and I still feel guilty for everything that had happened when I was gone. I feel like dying. It's true though, I can't take all this guilt anymore. I feel like it's tearing me apart day by day, but I make it through each day because of my girls and Si Ahn. When I'm with them...there's no place I'd rather be then by their side. I know (Y/n) would be heartbroken without me. Hearing about how she had hurt herself and almost leaving....it's killing me on the inside. I just want it all to go away.

(Y/n) POV
Jihoon had been acting a bit weird the past few days but every time I ask him if he's okay or needs anything he always says he's fine and that he's just tired. "Oppa...." I say while messing with his hair. "Hmm" he coos. "Are you sure your okay. Your not sick or anything?" I asked. "Aniya. I'm fine Jagi." He tells me. "Are you sure?" I ask once more. He looked up at me this time. "Why do you ask? I promise you I'm alright." He tells me with sympathy. "It's just...I feel like you've been acting different the past few days. I know you keep saying your tired but I don't think that's it. Please just let me know if your not okay." I tell him. "Okay I will, but I promise you I'm okay." He says pulling me into a hug. "There's no need to worry." He mumbles. He then looked at me with a small smile and kissed me on the lips. "You trust don't you sweetheart?" He asked me. "Yes I do trust you... But I just don't want you to feel guilty for anything that happened when you were gone or for you to feel like you should leave. I don't want you to leave or feel guilty. It's all in the past and I can't bear to loose you." I tell him with tears forming in my eyes. "Hey everything is okay. I won't leave you. I do feel guilty because I wasn't here for you when you needed me the most and I do feel like I should leave....not from you but from reality. I feel like I caused you so much trouble when I wasn't here for you. I feel....I feel like I lost everything. You, Sang hee, Si Ahn, the guys.....I feel like I lost your love." He told me, his eyes full of sadness. "Jihoon, you never lost my love for you. I love you with all my heart and that's never going to change. I know you feel like you lost everything but I can tell you right now you lost nothing. You still have me, the kids, seventeen, your parents.....and I know you feel guilty but you shouldn't. I really do mean it. I love you so much and I hate seeing you feel full of so much guilt." I held his hands in mine, while looking at the floor. "Thank you." I looked up at him. "For what?" I asked. "For not forgetting me. For loving me even though I wasn't with you. For believing in me when everyone else thought I was gone. For marrying me....for everything." He said. That's when I started crying. "Please don't cry." Jihoon said with a worried tone. "I'm sorry I made you cry. Why don't we just celebrate Si Ahn's birthday okay?" He told me, wiping away my tears. "O-okay and its o-okay, really." I told him. I know he didn't mean to make me cry but what if he really did leave. I knew he meant he wanted to die but I didn't want him too. I really couldn't bear losing him because of how guilty he felt. "Let's get ready so the guys and our parents can come over okay?" He told me, kissing me on the lips. "Okay." I said once more before Sang hee came in the room with a smile on her face, showing us her noodle art work of Nana.

Sorry if this chapter is bad T-T I'll make a better one.....hopefully this chapter wasn't that bad though.