The Choice ✔︎ Blake Griffin

5✔︎ When We Met - Part I

Jubilee

My eyes slowly opened, and confusion took over for a second while I got my bearings. I was naked...under my covers...with...Blake's arm wrapped securely around my waist. Oh shit, we had sex last night, I thought as I looked behind me watching Blake sleep peacefully. A million thoughts ran through my head as a small smirk appeared on my face. That smirk turned into a smile when I remember Blake's last words to me before we fell asleep. He loves me. Blake Griffin loves me, plain old Jubilee Carlisle. And to think, I never thought I could be truly loved...

Seven Years Ago

My biggest insecurity has always been whether I could be loved by someone outside of my family. A black woman with natural hair, "too much" ambition and drive, and an intimidating family of eight successful people led by my father, an assistant athletic director at Texas and a pastor.

My last name always preceded me at Texas as every member of my family up to this point had graduated from Texas and left some sort of legacy in their wake. I was always being reminded of the fact that my father, Jacob Carlisle, is a former NFL player, and is the captain and defensive MVP of the 1970 national championship football team, an all-American, and a member of the college hall of fame. Or the fact that my mother, Jada Hudson, now Jada Carlisle, graduated at the top of her nursing class and now taught as an adjunct professor.

Then there's my oldest sister, Jade, valedictorian of her law class, going on to clerk for a Supreme Court justice and now defending death row clients wrongfully convicted. Following her is my sister, Jacqueline, the first black president of the Panhellenic Council at Texas who graduated Magna Cum Laude in Nutrition and launched a protest that led to healthier food options offered in Texas' cafeterias. She currently makes her living as a traveling nutritionist for college football teams.

And then comes my Grammy-nominated sister, Jordan Carlisle, who graduated Magna Cum Laude in Marketing, but was obviously well-known for her voice, singing the national anthem at numerous sporting events, and singing with UT's choir when President Obama came to speak while on his campaign trail. She is now traveling the nation, headlining her first concert tour.

Then there's me. Jubilee Carlisle. Currently maintaining a 4.0 GPA as a double major in Secondary Education and English, President of Leading Longhorns, a mentorship program for local high school girls, and author of Perfect Patricia, my first published young adult book that won the 2006 John Newberry Medal and made it onto the Young Adult Book Award List. Not to mention my twin brothers, Julius and Justice, who plan to play football and follow in the footsteps of my father.

I had just gotten off the phone with my mother who called me every day before my 1 o'clock class. Today she wanted to check on me since I recently broke up with my high school sweetheart and boyfriend of five years, Trenton Davis, All-American small forward for Texas. This is the third time we've broken up, and I think it's for good this time. The last two times I broke up with him for cheating on me (which my family doesn't know because my sisters would've chopped his dick off and then crucify me for taking him back), but this time I broke up with him because we were growing apart.

I find myself tied up with more and more commitments, and he begins to let the groupies flock again since I'm "not giving him enough attention." I was not going to wait around until he got overbearing and controlling before cheating on me again and breaking my already taped-together heart.

Besides, I was tired of making decisions based on trying to be perfect. Yes, Trenton would've been the perfect candidate for husband as the young, talented, intelligent, eloquent, and well-dressed man he was with all roads leading to the NBA. But, he didn't add joy to my life, he just added depth to my "perfect" image. And at 21, it's time I start differentiating. My mom had been trying to encourage me to get back on the dating scene, but I was contemplating swearing off men altogether. I don't think a man could get along with my dreams and lifestyle.