The Persistent Alpha, & Resistant Luna

23. Nova With Nothing . Nova With No One .

It was two in the morning, and Grey and I were still up talking.

"So, I guess it's inevitable. We have to talk about it."

"What's that?"

"Dark blondie one and two."

"Ah, if you don't want to we don't have to. I have that handled, pet. Your job isn't to worry about things like that."

"Oh yeah, so what's my job, Alpha?"

"To sit there and be the pretty little Luna that you are, pet. I'll take care of you."

"I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm not the kind of girl that depends on anyone to take care of them."

"There's nothing wrong with having someone to depend on, or being taken care of. Though I know you don't need it Nova, I want to."

"What's so great about me? I'm just Nova, Nova with nothing. Nova with no one." I could feel the tears welling up behind my lids.

"Don't you see?" He took my hands, pulling me up and making a face when he noticed my tears, "Look around you."

He stood up, pulling me up with him. "Go anywhere in this house. Go miles and miles out, even past those stupid trees out there, they're yours. It's all yours." He wasn't yelling, but his tone was excited and heartwarming.

I looked back and forth between his pale brown eyes, the left holding the spec of green I'd strangely grown accustomed to.

"You're not alone, at least not anymore. You have a whole pack behind you. Me, I'm here. If you let me be." He pulled me closer, but not enough to be touching.

I was choked up, I didn't know what to say, let alone think. What could I say to a man with such a declaration? It wasn't even of love, but I felt like it was so much more.

It was me being afraid to let go of what I knew. Loneliness. I was afraid to give myself to not just a man, but to anyone.

I feared that if I let Grey in, he'd find a way into my heart and then shut it down.

How much of my heart did I have left? How much more could it take?

Was he worth the risk? Was he worth taking that chance and not being afraid of what comes next?

Mom taught me to never be afraid. She was fearless. I was fearless. And that never stopped her from opening her heart up to dad.

My hands tightened around his arms and I stepped into him, our body's now close enough to touch. He didn't hesitate to fill the space.

"Say something, pet. Anything.." The nonchalant Grey I'd met was long gone now, though I knew he wasn't far, but right now I was facing a different him.

A vulnerable him.

"I like the way I feel when I'm with you."

He smiled. "That's a start."

"But I don't like the weakness that comes with it."

"And an Alpha would?"

Point taken.

He held me closer, much tighter. "I won't hurt you, Nova. I'll do everything but that. The bond we share means I'd lay my life down for you, and now that I know you, I'd do it without it."

"I don't want that. No more death. No more lives lost. I can't take it anymore." I buried my face into his chest. "I'll lose my mind if someone else dies."

I hoped he knew that meant for the pack he'd threatened to take down as well.

"Nova, you have to understand. With this life comes loss. With any life comes loss. I can't promise that you won't see that, it'd be a lie if I did."

A weird noise sounded off in my throat, cuing the tears.

"I'm sorry."

"I'm thankful that you're honest."

"I can promise you something though."

"Hm?"

"You won't lose me."

"Good, you're growing on me exotic eyes."

He chuckled, "Score for wolf boy."

I laughed into his chest. "You don't think any one of your chefs would mind whipping up something this late, do you?"

"I can-"

"No." I held him there just as he was about to move. "You need to rest, you don't ever sleep. I'll just go.. find.. something." I waved my hand around in a odd gesture.

"Better yet. I'll ring up a chef."

"Hey, my masterpiece was delicious. You ate the whole thing in like two bites!"

He laughed, pulling me over to the bed. I sat down, but when he continued to stand over me, I felt self-conscious.

"Grey?"

He put an arm behind his head and pulled his shirt from over him.

My mind went blank immediately, at a loss for words, I just sat there openly staring at every. Single. One. Of those beautifully chiseled abs.

The way his muscles cut in three lines on his upper ribcages and how defined his v-cut was that led down to his delectables.

I don't know what game he was playing at, but mighty God, was he winning. I felt like I had to wipe drool from my lip, but my arms were too numb to move.

My eyes hesitantly trailed their way up his solid frame, over his broad chest, past the veins in his neck, to that perfectly sculpted face.

That face with those pale brown, bedroom eyes.

I gasped lightly, feeling like I was seeing him for the first time.

He took my hand and placed it to his chest, just over his heart. "Mālama." His voice was just a breath.

I wasn't sure what that meant. But I couldn't form a coherent thought enough to ask, the only thing I could register was the feel of his warm, muscled skin beneath the pads of my fingers.

"Pet?" His other hand caressed the side of my face, his thumb stroking circles into the hand that was over his chest.

"Grey.." My voice was a whisper.

He cocked his head to the side, studying me with such observant eyes. I felt like he was trying to look into my soul, to read it like it was a book, and add his own chapters into my empty, lonesome pages.

Can I do it? Can I give myself to you?

I closed my eyes, struggling internally with my emotions. And out of all things in a time like this, my mom came to mind.

Her beaming smile and deep blue eyes as she wrapped herself in my father's arms. Her blonde-brown hair up in a messy bun.

She leaned her head back, her eyes glossing over as she looked into his. Then she kissed him, a smile still playing on her lips as she smashed hers whole-heartedly into his.

I opened my eyes. The image now deeply engraved.

"Kiss me."