Remembrance ; Levi

♡ I Shouldn't Have Looked

You woke up to the pained sounds of Jin. Outside, the moon was covered by clouds. Your vision was impaired, and you couldn't see far. 

The room was cold, and you swore you could almost see your breath when you took a breath. Your fingers and toes were freezing. 

Despite that, you were able to see your friend thrashing on his bed; looking as if he was fighting off something in his sleep. 

He seemed to almost be faking it, with how much he was trembling. 'Maybe he's just cold?' You suggested in your head, dismissing the thought just moments later when he let out a small yelp like a hurt puppy. 

It reminded you of how you had seen Levi with his nightmares. Chills ran down your back as your vision blurred, and you almost saw Lev in the place of Jin. 

Across the room- labored breathing. 

Finally, after just watching him silently, Jin bolted up, stretching his fingers towards the ceiling as if he was reaching out to something. 

A guttural cry left him, shaking and surprising you at your core. He made no attempt to soften his voice, so it rang throughout the house. You wondered if your father would leave his room in curiosity. 

As Jin's hand reached upwards and he shrieked in terror, a name left his lips. There was no doubt in whom he had called. 

'Hana.' 

Your hands touched your cold lips, before you slowly returned to your own bed, slinking away into the darkness before the moonlight could shine again.

___

Your eyes rested on the ring that hung around a thin necklace chain that beamed proudly from Jin's chest. It almost seemed to be shouting for attention. 

"What- curious?" 

Your eyes quickly averted away. Despite the fact that you really, really, really didn't have much care for the necklace, a small irking feeling tugged at your feelings. 

It had started up today, when just the night before, Jin had shattered the world's silence. 

"I don't really care or anything." You shrugged, but the frown on your face gave it away before you could replace it with a poker face. 

A few minutes later, you couldn't help asking. 

"...who gave it to you?" Your voice sounded small, vulnerable, and even strange to your own ears. Jin smiled, before tucking it back inside his shirt. "Someone special." 

A pang struck you; like a lightning bolt to your heart. 

'Dammit!' 

It wasn't like you didn't know what it was. It was more like you didn't want to acknowledge your past self's strong feelings of affection for him. 

'Annoying,' you sighed in your mind. 

"Cool, cool." You tried to play it off, normally. You weren't aware of it, but your voice actually rose about an octave higher. 

Jin laughed and took his nearby coat off it's old, bronze hook. He seemed more tired now, and more restless.

Bags surrounded his eyes, making them appear more dark than ever. You hadn't seen his pale and eager orbs in so long. 

As he was readjusting his shirt, something fell out and fluttered towards the ground. It was a stained, brown paper. As you bent down to retrieve it for him, your eyes couldn't help but scan it. 

You didn't mean it- it was just something everything did. You had thought that whatever was on the paper was just a small list- probably something for groceries. 

Unfortunately, it didn't occur to you the things that could be on that paper. A list a people Jin wanted to kill? A list of murderers that were his friend? 

It might not seem like an enormous thing, for on that piece of paper was a well-drawn portrait of two people. 

'Oh my! A portrait! That's so horrifying!!'

'Yeah, no.'

It struck you just a split second later as you registered their familiar faces that floated just near your consciousness. "T-t-t-this is-!" 

Jin turned to you, confused. He even tilted his head, "what is it?" 

You pressed your fingertips to your head, squeezing your eyes shut. 

Faint voices whispered in your ear, even though you knew there really wasn't anyone there. It felt as if you had forgotten an important formula during a test, but remembered it as you neared the end of said exam. 

A faint piece of memory returned to you. It seemed as if it had just happened, and the hairs on your arm raised. 

Your breathing was quiet, and you could remember it if you closed your eyes. A picnic. Two people. Laughter. It was warm. Breezes welcomed the two. 

Your hands flew to your mouth. The paper fluttered to the ground, exposing the well-drawn couple in the photo. It couldn't be clearer that it was you and Jin in it. The you with perfect memory and nothing missing. Jin with a happy smile as he stared at the woman in it. 

Whoever had drawn it had clearly poured their feelings in it, and you just had the feeling it was the man standing in front of you. 

The room was silent as you both just stared at each other. You had a mixture of emotions: confusion, happiness, worry, and so much more. 

You didn't know what to do with the small piece of returned memory. Scared at having regained it at all, you were slightly jumpy and dazed. 

Not only were there a minuscule part of memory returned, a little section of your feelings had come with it.