He Loves Me Not *Under Editing*

'The Talk'

I sat down with bated breath and waited for the floodgates to unleash.  "What do you mean that you don't want to hurt me?"

"I just want you to talk then I'll answer any question you have to the best of my abilities."

"Fine.  You can't hurt me.  Because being hurt is inevitable and there is nothing you can do to prevent it.  Cydney, being hurt by you would be a blessing.  I know your morals would be enough that you weren't anything but loyal.  It sounds really fucking cliche, but I want us to have a chance.  You may be small and think you are insignificant, but you are so much more."  

He stopped talking and I was tearing up.  I pulled my sleeve over my hand and wiped away any stray tears.  I sniffled a few times before I was willing to speak.  "Okay.  What are your questions, Alex."

He smirked at the nickname.  "Why do you hate my car."

I wasn't ready to answer that question yet.  "I have memories in it, and I don't want to remember them."

"Fair enough, now I only have one other question."

"What?"

"Can we have a real first date?"

"I would like that."  He smiled like a little kid would at a candy shop.  "Then, you get to choose the place."

"Dino's"

"You really like Italian huh?"

"You betcha."  He pushed himself up from the table and left.  Chyna came back over and shot me a questioning look.  I sent her one that assured everything was A-OK and went back to my fries.  This school may not have a lot going for it, but it had cute guys, and soggy french fries.

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The next day after Spanish my English teacher pulled me aside.  My date with Alex was set for tonight and I was thinking of skipping lunch.  "Cydney, can you go to the field for me?"

"Why?"

"There is something that you need to see."  My face grew worried as hers grew sympathetic.  I raced to the field as fast as my legs would carry me.  About three-fourths of the way there I stopped and calmed my breathing.  I felt that I needed to be quiet in the pit of my stomach.  I rounded the bleachers and froze when I saw it.  

Laurie was sliding her hand up my date's leg and he was making no move to stop her.  She leaned in and started kissing him.  I don't know when I started it, but I was screaming.  I had also dropped to the concrete in the process.  Alex stopped sucking face and stared at me in shock.  Laurie smiled like the cat that ate the canary.

The a-hole made a move to come after me, but I let my adrenaline fuel me to running away.  I made it back to English and texted Chyna to bring me food.  I was in no mood to run into Alex in the hall right now.  Ms. Anderson felt the anguish that was radiating off of me in waves and just sat at her desk waiting for me to say something.

She may have been my favorite teacher but I was in no mood to communicate.  I sat there eating a salad like a zombie.  I had no idea why Alex kissing Laurie made me so upset.  We weren't exclusive.  Hell, we were having our first real date tonight.  So why did it hurt so bad?  I made it through the salad and finally decided to go home.  Mostly because the teacher had another class after lunch.  She offered for me to be a TA for the period but I profusely refused and left.  I went to my backpack and hit the bottom corner to open it.  

I was almost done getting my things when I heard his voice stuttering behind me.  "C-Cyd.  It's not what you think."

I slammed my locker shut so hard that it reverberated through the empty hallway like a thousand of them.  I whirled around and looked him straight in his eyes.  "No Alexander Peterson.  You do NOT get to apologize to me.  I was giving you another chance and you threw it away like it was nothing."

He opened his mouth as if to say something but I held my hand up to silence him instead.  "Alex, I would think that after being cheated on by such a slut you would let her go.  I guess I was wrong.  I was starting to forgive Chyna for opening her mouth.  But you're to much of a dick to let anything good happen to me.  I.  Am.  Done.  Don't fucking talk to me again.  Don't look at me during class again.  Don't even breath in my direction.  I am refusing to be held down by such a coward."

An extreme look of hurt flashed across his face before it was hidden by a poker face.  I did the sign language for f-you.  It was rare for me to say anything worse than slut or Hell unless I was infuriated.  And even that was an understatement at the moment.  I left him in the dust as I took off outside.  I passed Laurie and flipped her off without stopping.  The bitch wanted her spring fling, she could have him and all his friends too.  I may be racked with survivor's guilt, but at least he didn't cheat on me while he was alive.

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Despite my requests to Alex to leave me alone he still tried.  I had ignored him for three months, meaning that it was almost time for Halloween.  For three months since that day Alex had tried to talk to me.  And for three months I came up with creative ways to tell him to go screw himself.  My latest idea was to date somebody on the football team.  I hang out on the field more and Cameron had taken and interest in me.  He took me out on a few dates and held nothing back when jerk face asked him how it went.  Where Alex was tall, Cameron was a little bit shorter, and he had dimples.  

Chyna did not approve of what I was doing at all.  She kept saying that I should talk to him despite my rebuttals that I had given him time to prove himself.  She told me that he messaged her every day to ask how I was and if I was willing to talk.  He told her that he felt horrible and his gameplay was showing it.  Whenever I went to watch Cameron play keep away (my name for football)  Alex played horribly.  He had deep bags under his eyes and kept staring at me instead of playing.  This made Laurie even more upset and would hang all over him.

I acted indifferent especially when he would shrug her off and keep staring at me or ask Chyna to come talk to me.  My best friend was pissed that I was hurting one of her friends and that she had to be the messenger for the friend with  cheating tendencies.  She pleaded with me to even have her tell him something to get him to sleep, but I refused.  I had said all I needed to say and had nothing more to add.

Even my English teacher was treating him colder.  She would deliberately avoid him in class or say rhetorical comments.  She even made us do a writing prompt where she asked us how we would react if we were cheated on.  After the papers were turned in she immediately took three out.  Mine, Alexander's, and Laurie's.  After reading Laurie's she scoffed and after Alex's she sneered.  She read mine with a sympathetic voice and apologized for my past experiences.

Chyna finally thought that this had gone on for way too long.  She set up a date with us.  My only agreement was that Whorie and Chyna were there to see this go down.  After all, someone had to post it on YouTube.