Colleen POV
"Josh, I am sorry babe. I am just so busy " I say trying to get him to look at me. "Colleen, you promised me that you would take care of yourself. I knew this might happen but thought with Kory here..." He says wiping tears from his face. I nod silently hugging him. I feel his arms around me tight. "I can't see you like that again Colleen" he says crying now. "Josh it won't" I say holding his face. "I will do better" I say kissing his lips. He kisses me back forcefully as I tighten my arms around him. We pull back from the kiss after a minute and he is sobbing. He sits down on the armchair in my room as I sit on his lap. He is silent again. He is overthinking. "Babe?" I ask watching him. "I think of how Erin has struggled lately and then you two years back. It destroys me" he whispers. "Joshua, it isn't like two years ago" I say. "Its starting the same way" he says staring at me. "What happens when we want to have a baby and you gain weight. How are you going to handle that?" he asks. "Then there won't be just me anymore. I won't be selfish. I would never harm our child" I say squeezing his hand. He nods believing me as he stares at our intertwined hands. "Speaking of that, I think we should start that process after I am done here in a month and a half" I say trying to make a happier mood. He looks up from our hands with tears in his eyes. He is silent staring at me. "Nothing would make me happier. I want you to be the mother of my baby sweetheart. Please take care of yourself. You are perfect" he says. I nod crying again as I hug him. His hands slide under my shirt holding me. His fingertips resting on my back are my lifeline. They calm every nerve in my body. His love for me overwhelms me.
Later that morning after showering again and getting dressed in comfier clothes, Kory, Josh and I go downtown to eat. Josh's facial expression has changed from a few hours ago and it makes me happy. Seeing him upset especially on something I did kills me. He reaches across the table as we listen to Kory talk about his date the other night. I squeeze it and go back to listening to Kory. Two of my favourite men who love me are sitting around me. I am one lucky girl.
We spend the rest of the day quietly and climb into bed later that night. The room is dark as I lay in Josh's arms. "Josh, how is Erin?" I ask as the question plagued me the entire day. There is some silence. "My Momma says she is doing better" he says. I nod kissing his chest as his hand rests on the back of my head as he pauses. "I love her and you Colleen. I die seeing you guys struggle and especially what that asshole did to her. My sweet sister" he says getting emotional. I hug him to cam him down. "I love you Joshua" I whisper closing my eyes.
A/n..... Comments please!! Do I continue this story???
