I Can't Cope (COMPLETED)

Chapter 1 - Riley

I'm just collecting up my stuff at the end of a really great dance rehearsal, when James, my boyfriend, comes up to me.

"Hey Riley, you know you want to come to Hidalgo's with me..." he says, smiling cheekily. Rolling my eyes and then smiling, I reply, "Yeah, I guess I could." After all, I don't want him to be too full of himself – he's cocky enough already!

I'm sitting in Hidalgo's, the coffee shop below the studio, waiting for James to get the drinks. Everything's going really well at The Next Step at the moment. Almost too well, thinking about it. We usually have drama of some kind to deal with, and dance has to be put aside - but there's been no drama whatsoever. A Troupe just clicks, that's all - at the moment, at least! It's great.

I've been pushing myself recently, because there's a solo competition coming up. I haven't told anyone, but I really want to do it. I love expressing my emotions through dance, and it's just a great way to feel good about yourself - especially if you win, of course.

James walks over to our table. He looks at me quizzically. "What are you thinking about, Riles? You're just sat there grinning away to yourself!"

"Nothing really, just that life's pretty good right now, I guess...' The smile slips off my face as I realise I've shown my emotions so obviously AGAIN.

I try to avoid sharing my thoughts and feelings with other people whenever possible. Things have happened in the past, and I've learned that letting people in often results in you getting hurt, so I try to keep things to myself. I really need to work on hiding the emotions that I show on my face though; everyone always reads me like a book.

James just looks at me.

"What?" I ask, my smile slowly reappearing as I look up to his open, friendly face.

"Just thinking how lucky I am," he replies, smiling, this time in a serious way. "to have you."

"Why?" I ask doubtfully. "I'm nothing special, you could get anyone else. Past relationships show that other guys obviously don't like me, why should you?"

He pauses for a moment, perhaps gathering his thoughts together.

"If other guys don't like you, then that's their loss. I love everything about you, all your quirks and habits, from the way you like to control everything, to the way you bite your nails when you're stressed, to the way you worry about the little things. You always make me feel great and I want you to know. You're always so insecure – but there's no reason for you to be, you're perfect, don't even worry about it. You know you can be open with me, Riley."

He looks down at his drink. I think he's pretty shocked that he was so open about his feelings. To be honest, I'm pretty shocked too. I didn't realise he actually liked me that much. No one's ever said anything like that about me before. I mean, guys have noticed me before, but it's always been a stupid crush.

I've been falling for every single guy in hope that he's the one. But it always leads to the same thing. They move on, leaving me behind to 'pick up the pieces' or whatever. Though I think I still haven't retrieved them all yet. I'm still struggling on alone. Still searching.

I say 'still', though it's actually different now. I've found James. Well, I wouldn't say 'found', more 'noticed'. We've been going to the same dance studio for years, and he was always the one everyone thought was the player. Yes, he did try to date every single girl there (and failed), but, thinking about it, the ones he did date, he treated well. When we started going out, I thought, this won't last long, but it's worth a try. And it's been 2 years now. We've had our ups and downs, but we're still going.

James looks up at me. He's blushing. I think he's waiting for me to say something. I don't know what to say! I just smile at him. He looks into my eyes and I know that's all he wanted – for me to hear what he said, to understand. He leans in towards me. I begin to lean in as well but I am interrupted by someone calling.

"Guys! Guys! Public place!" It's West. He goes to The Next Step too. He's a bit, how shall I put it, weird. Slightly crazy, but good fun, I guess.

"West, really? You had to interrupt that?" James says, obviously annoyed.

"The whole of Hidalgo's doesn't want to see your displays of affection!" West replies, grinning. I know he's just trying to wind up James. All the boys always do that. It's working as well: James gives him a sarcastic smile. But after a few moments, James frowns moodily.

"Come on, Riley, let's go." he mutters, getting up from his seat. I look up at West, my facial expression probably mirroring his. Confusion.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So that's Chapter 1 everyone! Comment below what you think so far. Hoping to post the next chapter soon :)