I Can't Cope (COMPLETED)

Chapter 52 - Riley

A vibration from my phone wakes me up. I pray it will be from James, but I know that it will most definitely be Nick. I've been trying to ignore his messages, but to tell the truth, with some of the stuff he's been saying, it's kind of impossible.

I don't know if I thought I enjoyed what he did to me last time, because stupidly reminding myself of it now makes me sick and repulsed - I can't believe anyone could do that to anyone... A 12 year old too... That girl being me.

Shaking my head in an unsuccessful attempt to rid my brain of my thoughts, I prop myself up weakly on my elbows to reach over to my bedside table for my phone.

Surprisingly, the message is from James.

Good morning :)

I can't reply to that, especially as I know today won't be good. Nick will probably end up finding me and hurting me when he discovers I'm not in at 2 o'clock. But I have to risk it. I can't go to his house.

I stop myself from reading over James' two words any more times as I realise I still have another notification. A voicemail.

My whole body tenses up as I recognise his voice.

"You liked last time? Well it's been 4 years, you can't expect for it not to have changed. I've made improvements, for me obviously. I have my own place now. No one will hear your screams. Riley, you may not be answering my texts, but you're still coming over. I'm gonna have fun, we tell no one, okay? Well, to be honest, I don't care if it is or isn't, that's what's gonna happen. See you then. If you don't come outside, I'll just come in and find you. You know there's no point hiding from me."

The line crackles as the message ends. My arms become too weak to support me and I fall down onto my bed. I'm going to die, and it's not even down to my own actions anymore, despite that being the way I thought my life would end. I can't get out of this, even if I go to James' house - Nick will work out where I am, even if he doesn't know James' number, address or anything. He's manipulative, forceful, intelligent - he knows what he wants and he'll do anything to get it. He'll twist the truth to fit him and work out where to move you in his game, like pieces in a merciless chess match. Girls are like pawns to him, he doesn't care if he loses a couple along the way.

Trying to stop myself shaking as I stand up, I decide not to reply to his message either. I mean, I don't have anything to say - nothing I say will stop him, nothing will mean anything to him. He just doesn't care.

After making a quick visit to the bathroom, I slowly walk downstairs, confused as to why it's so quiet. I then glance up at the clock and realise it's still pretty early. Wait, why would James text me this early? That's just strange, he must be up to something.

"Morning." a voice behind me says, causing me to jump rather manically. Luckily, it's only Emily, although I'm still not exactly thrilled to see her.

"Hi." I reply weakly. I still don't exactly know where we stand, I can't say I completely trust her, but what's new? I haven't properly trusted anyone since aged 11.

"Are you okay?" she asks, looking around for something. Her phone probably, she's always texting Hunter. I wish I had someone like that. But every time I find someone, they always find a way to damage me somehow, whether it's physically... emotionally... or psychologically, it's always something.

"Yes..." I wearily reply with my usual phrase: "I'm fine."

"Okay... Well, I've messaged Piper."

"How?" I say, moving away from her.

"There are other ways of communicating other than text Riley." she replies sassily. "I know something happened with you and James."

"When?" I reply, pretending not to have a clue.