A while later, we finish eating and I excuse myself, saying I need to go upstairs. I flop onto my bed and lay there for a while, deciding what to do. I go to reach for my phone from my pocket, then realise I'm wearing a dress.
"Ugh." I find myself saying out loud. "I guess I'll have to go and get it then..."
I walk down the stairs and along the hallway, looking for my phone. I hear Steph's voice coming from the living room, followed by Emily's, saying,
"I know. But you can never be completely sure of anything... Anyway, I've had enough of talking. Can we do something else?"
Hmm, I wonder what they were talking about. To be honest, there's a lot they could be talking about right now. Perhaps there's so much more to Emily's life than she reveals, I don't know.
I carry on down the hallway and get my phone from the kitchen. I unlock it and see a message from James.
Hey Ri
Hey James I reply. Walking back upstairs, my phone vibrates. I walk back into my room and sit on my lilac beanbag. I unlock my phone again. I love that he replies so quickly, it just makes it so much easier, no games, no messing me around.
Ri I know who the person I saw earlier was, at least I think I do.
Who? I reply quickly (I'm nosy like that).
Hunter.
Hunter?
Yeah. I'm 90% certain it was him.
What would Hunter be doing in town today? He moved away ages ago and he's not coming to see Emily until Wednesday.
He's coming to see Emily?
Yeah. She wanted to meet up with him.
Do you think he's changed his number?
Probs not, Emily managed to call him earlier...
Okay cool. I'll call him now.
After texting for a while, James brings the conversation to an end. We were just talking, and then he basically went and said bye, I'm going to talk to someone else now. For God's sake, boys are never exactly how you want them. I don't think it really helps that I'm a perfectionist, so I expect nothing less than the best from people, especially myself - even though I don't think I'm good enough for others. To be honest, I think that just makes me push myself harder, in an attempt to catch up with everyone else.
We have dance rehearsal after school tomorrow, and I think I'm going to spend it practising my solo. Thinking about it, I'm probably going to spend most days rehearsing my solo, because I need it to be perfect, otherwise they'll give it away to someone else. I really don't want that. I want to represent The Next Step at this competition, not someone else.
I get up and walk over to my desk, looking at the different things arranged on it. Various mascaras, eyeliners and nail varnishes occupy the left hand side, whilst the right side is dominated by pictures of my family, me and James, and me and Michelle.
Speaking of Michelle, we haven't talked since yesterday, which seems much longer ago than it was. I could message her, I guess... Actually, thinking about it, I'm exhausted! I'll talk to her tomorrow.
I switch off my phone and put it down on my desk. The house is seemingly silent for a moment before I hear whispering from the hallway. I walk out of my room slowly to investigate.
I reach the top of the stairs and peer over the banister.
"She's really heavy!" Steph whispers to Giselle. She's carrying Emily up the stairs whilst Giselle carries a blanket behind her.
"What are you doing?!" I ask in a loud whisper. They look up at me.
"What does it look like?" Steph whispers, carrying an asleep Emily up the stairs.
"Are you making sure her knee is supported?" I ask anxiously.
"Riley," Giselle says. "I'm pretty sure Steph is just focusing on actually getting her up the stairs as opposed to carrying her well!"
Steph speeds up as she reaches Emily's room and carefully places her on her bed. Giselle lays the blanket on top of her. I peer around them.
"Are you sure she's okay?" I ask.
"Yeah, I think so. We were just watching a film and she drifted off..." Steph explains.
"We're going to have to go now, Riley, is that okay?" Giselle asks.
"Yeah it is." I reply. "She won't notice so it's fine. Thank you for helping with Emily. I hope Hunter feels the same way as she does."
"If he doesn't..." Steph trails off.
"Yeah, I really don't know what will happen." I say sadly.
We walk out of Emily's room and down the stairs towards the front door.
"Bye, Riley!" They say, hugging me.
"Bye guys." I reply quietly. They put their shoes on and open the door, closing it behind them as they leave.
Finding myself standing in the hallway with nothing to do, I walk back upstairs again. I pop my head around Emily's door. Is she okay? I hope so. I walk back out again, running my hand through my hair. Why do I stress about so many things? James said he liked the fact that I worry about the little things, but I just don't see how it is a positive thing.
Thinking over all the things that have happened recently, I get into bed, not even bothering to change into my pyjamas. People are never who I think they are, they always have things to hide. But, then again, I can't really expect others to be completely open with me if I'm not with them...
I lie there for a while, just thinking. I find myself doing that a lot. I think way more than I speak, because, I guess, I'm just a lot more comfortable keeping things in my head. Even if I want to tell someone something, it's just better if I don't. Regardless of anyone's opinion on it, that's just how I think - I can't help that and I can't change.
After a few moments, my eyelids begin to grow heavy and I feel myself drifting through the layers of sleep, falling, falling, falling into the effortless, welcoming dreamland and out of stressful, confusing reality, a place where I am almost never content and never fully happy with the way things are... or the way things have been, or the way things will be...
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There's chapter 17 :) What did you think? Why is Hunter in town? Is Emily actually okay? Will Riley ever open up to people? Keeping reading to find out!
Please continue to vote and comment too, I love to find out what people think of my story :D
Chapter 18 will be up soon... :)
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I Can't Cope (COMPLETED)
Fanfiction'Why does everything keep reminding me of the past? I don't want a repeat and I certainly don't want to be reminded. It hurts too much. One more thing and I might just be pushed over the edge...' Everything always looks fine from the outside. Riley...
