I Can't Cope (COMPLETED)

Chapter 24 - Riley

I slam my bedroom door behind me and flop on my bed.

I think over what Emily said. I guess some people might say she's right, that I say one thing, but then do the opposite. But that doesn't mean I  think she's right. When she's acting so stupidly herself, how can she expect me to listen to what she has to say?

And anyway, she's wrong, thinking that I'm just putting on this whole 'don't trust anyone' act, just because James happens to be my boyfriend. Because him being my boyfriend doesn't actually make me let him in any more than anyone else.

I bring out my phone and go onto my text messages. I look for James' reply but can't even find the message I sent to him. Ugh, I'm really not in the mood for phone glitches or even perhaps my own ineptitude of sending a simple text. Then I realise - I must have sent it in Messenger or something. I flick onto the app and see that James has seen my message - but hasn't replied. Strange. I guess maybe he's still busy...?

I decide to call him. The ringing tone plays for a while until he eventually picks up.

"Uh... hey?" he says.

"James? Is everything okay? What happened? Why didn't you reply to my message?"

The line is silent for a moment.

"Uh... my sister's ill." he says.

"Really? How ill?" I ask, worriedly.

"She's in hospital."

"Oh my god, poor Piper! Are you there now?"

"Yeah." he replies.

"Do you want me to come?"

"No no no!" he says quickly.

"Why not?"

"She's... she's not allowed any visitors."

"But you're there..." I say slowly.

"Well yeah, I meant other than family, Riley."

"Okay... well I hope she's okay." I say.

"Yeah. See you tomorrow, Riley." he says.

"Okay-" I stop, realising he's ended the call. Odd. I guess he's just stressed out about Piper, understandably, seeing as she's in hospital.

I get up off my bed, realising I'm still in my wet clothes, and change into a pair of leggings and a jumper. Standing there, I suddenly remember something. Even though sometimes I'd rather be focusing on dance and I'm forced to sort out family problems, on top of that I have homework to do, and tonight's homework is Maths.

I never really struggled with Maths, but that doesn't mean I find it super easy. But then again, no one finds it as hard as James. It's kind of surprising how far he's come since he got pulled from the studio for a few weeks, many months ago.

Thinking back to then, I remember that was the reason James and I are together - I was the one who made that happen. I don't even know why I let myself show my feelings towards him, because of what happened before him... I don't even want to think about that.

After that... incident, I guess I was just so distressed, and I guess confused as well, that I had to cling onto something. James offered a kind of safety net I guess, and I felt I needed to take action to make sure it was there. It was the one time I felt I had to have someone to rely on, despite the previous guy, whose name I don't even want to bring to mind, knocking my ability to trust anyone properly right out of me.

Recently though, things have changed. There's been many times I've questioned mine and James' relationship, but this time, it feels different.

For example, the other day when he complimented my outfit, and told me he loved me, I felt so good, and felt like everything was right. But now, what feels right is being on my own... I'm not even sure he's into me anymore anyway, he probably went along with Michelle's flirting the whole time I was in Studio B.

But I don't know what to do. It's nice to have someone there, but is it really worth it when you don't really trust them because you're always suspicious of what they could be doing when you're not there? Especially when you're the type of girl a guy would never fight to keep, because when things are over, they're over and he'll move on to someone else, someone better.

I've decided I'm just going to leave things for a bit, because, as I've already noticed, things can change quickly, even without me doing anything.

I've realised now that I've been staring at my sheet of Maths homework for ages, and I've done absolutely none of it - I've been too busy thinking, too busy over-analysing things AGAIN. Determinedly, I push my thoughts aside and concentrate on my homework. Eventually, I finish it and put down my pen.

Quickly, I change into my pyjamas and get into bed. I really cannot be bothered to resolve things with Emily this evening, so it'll have to wait. And dinner, well, it's not that important and I'm not really hungry anyway. Michelle told me to text her, but I can't be bothered to engage in a conversation with her either, so I see nothing else to do but to go to sleep.

Closing my eyes, I listen to the almost silent house. I hear laughing. Well I'm glad someone's having fun! Because it's not like her sister is stuck in her room alone, at the kind of time when all she really needs is some kind of sister advice...

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There's chapter 24 :) What did you think?

What's up with James? What happened to Riley before she was with James? Why is she so negative about guys? Comment your thoughts! :D

Please continue to read, comment and vote - it means so much to me! :)

The next chapter will be up ASAP - it's the last one before major things start happening... ;)