Circled by The Wolves [Brustoff]

Chapter 9

Luckily when I woke up I was in my bunk. Cameron handed me painkillers and a glass of water. 

"Do you remember what happened last night?" He asked me, and I nodded swallowing the pills.

"I saw my ex. It didn't go well, you told me about the tour and then I passed out, right?" I said all emotions drained from my voice. Inside, honestly, I was breaking.

It was easy dealing with it last night, well it wasn't but I was drunk so it didn't get to my rational thinking. Now that I'm fucking sober minus the hangover I felt awful. The memories of Dusty occupied my mind, and not just from last night, from the passed years too. 

I tried my best not to cry but Goddammit Cameron knew me to well.

"Why don't you talk to me?" He asked sadly.

Because I can't.

Because I don't want to.

Because I just wanna forget.

I tried to give him anything but I just chocked on my words and wiped the tears from my eyes before they spilled.

I jumped out of my bunk trying to ignore my body screaming at me to get back to bed and sleep. I didn't even have to look to know I was covered in bruises Dusty left all over me.

"We should check on Ben, yeah?" I said forcing a small smile onto my face. 

Cameron wasn't buying it but I ignored him. I wouldn't be able to sleep anyway. At this point I just wanted to sit and cry but I was to numb to do so. Thank God, because I would probably spill it all out like I did before when I broke down in front of Cameron.

If I can ignore this for at least little bit I will.

"Where's Ben?" I asked James as I saw him sitting on the couch.

"Out with Sam. He's pretty upset." James said.

"And you aren't?"

James just sighed. "Ben took it the hardest when Danny left the band you know."

I know, we talked about this.

"Ben once said if he ever saw him again it will be to soon..."

"Denis said the same thing about his ex and they ran into each other last night."  Cameron said and I looked at him as he betrayed me.

"Is that why you got so shitfaced last night. Mate, you were passed out in front of a club." James said. 

"Denis you should talk about..." Cameron started but I cut him off.

"I'm okay!" I snapped. "It's you guys that matter at this point so can you please stop thinking about me for half a second and think about how we're gonna get out of this tour!" I yelled. "And Ben..." I added more quietly. "Think about him." I spat.

I didn't mean to be so aggressive but if I had to choose between anger and braking into pieces I choose anger. And although what happened to me last night, I was worried about Ben and that tour that's coming up.

I was scared out of my mind but thankfully I still couldn't think straight and I was hoping it will stay that way for a while.

Before anyone could say another word Ben, Sam and our tour manager Kyle entered the room.

"I'm sorry guys I can't do anything about it. Sumerian Records want you to tour with them because it would look good and confirm there's no bad blood between you." Kyle spoke and we all knew he was honest. "Apparently the fans want this too, so..."