My life with Aspergers

Chapter 44- I feel like I have no privacy

Do you ever get that feeling like you have no privacy whatsoever? Well I do too sometimes. And this privacy considers with singing. Now I love to sing and I'm pretty sure some of you do too, others may not. For those of who don't know, I have this app called Smule  Karaoke. (And some may know this already) Anyways I feel like I have no privacy. Ok so let me tell you a little history with me..

For years my family had this Chevrolet van, it was big and kinda long. Anyways it got to the point where it couldn't be driven anymore. . Well it could but you'd have to probably pay thousands of dollars to fix it. I know, expensive right? So all those times when it would sit in the garage I used to think of the van as my "Studio" which basically meant anytime I wanted to sing, I would go out to the van. And I would probably stay in there for hours. Only time I ever came back inside the house was either 1; Dinner time, 2; My mp3 needed to be charged from using it so much *chuckle* Or 3; I was runnin out of energy (Meaning of singing)

So getting to the point of the van, that van was the only place I felt like I could sing at the top of my lungs if I wanted too and no one would care because they wouldn't be able to hear me from the van. I used to be in that van for hours. If my family didn't see me anywhere in the house, they knew to look in the van. But soon the time came to finally get rid of it.. I was sad about that because that made so many memories I had with that van.

Anyways I'm getting off topic.. Basically the van was only place I could sing it feels like. It seems anywhere I'm near my family, if I start singing they'll tell me to be quiet. Not just cuz they wanna hear it quiet but they don't wanna hear my singing voice if I'm singing along with the radio. They had told me that they rather hear the artist's voice. I normally have to sing in my closet so no one hears me but it seems like if I'm in my room, they'll just open the door without knocking it seems like and they'll tell me to be quiet. I just feel like I can't sing in front of my family or else they'll tell me to be quiet cuz they don't wanna hear my voice. And I have a good voice, let me tell you. But the thing that is weird is, whenever I start singing they'll tell me to be quiet as I have said. But whenever someone else starts singing, they don't say a word. So in my mind I'm thinking: So how come it's just me they tell to be quiet when I sing but whenever someone else starts singing, they don't say a word? Now I know I can get kinda loud but even when I start singing quietly, they still tell me to shush. So now whenever I'm in the car and a song comes on that I like, I have to keep my mouth shut and sing in my head.. And let me tell you, if you love singing it is not easy to sing in your head rather than sing out loud.

Whenever a song comes on the radio in the car, doesn't matter what it is whether it'd be country or another song, the second I start singing I'll be told to hush. So getting back to the privacy thing, it seems like I can't sing anywhere or else I'd be told to hush. Does any of you ever feel like you got no privacy?