Race to the Finish

Race to the Finish chp.58

I let all by body weight go and allowed myself to fall back into the nothingness of the air. I felt the wind rushing against my falling body, but before I could fully slip back, my body was being pulled forward by a stronger force.

I stumbled into Jason's chest and he immediately wrapped his arms around my body, holding me tight to him.

"What the f*ck do you think you are doing!" He exclaimed breathlessly and with a hint of anger.

I didn't say anything. I wasn't thinking anything. I just let myself go completely not giving a care as to what happened to me. I don't care what becomes of me any more. I'm just done...

He backed off a bit to look at me, but still kept me in his arms. My eyes were unfocused, my expression blank, and my body was limp.

"Let's take you home Alex." Jason said is a soft, cautious voice.

It didn't matter that he talked to me as if I were to break into a million tiny pieces at any given moment, what mattered is that he said he was taking me home...

Home.

I can't go back to that house filled with Jaiden's blood and the memories that will forever haunt me...

I won't go back. I won't!

I snapped my eyes to look directly into Jason's and I guess the hollow emptiness in my eyes broke down allowing Jason to see my fear of returning to that horrible house because worry entered his eyes and he changed destination.

"Titi's house?" He asked a little more alarmed than softly.

I nodded firmly and that's all it took for him to guide me away from that bridge; my final escape into the nothing of life; and towards Aliana's car.

Jason walked me to the passanger side and opened the door for me. He helped me getting in the car and I sat completely still staring straight ahead. He looked at me for a moment before he sighed sadly and closed the car door. He walked around the car to the driver's seat and turned the engine on.

Nothing.

I felt nothing.

The roar of the engine, the vibration beneath my feet, the sound of the car didn't make me feel anything at all... Not like it used to do. This was my medicine and now not even this can bring me out of my f*cking misery I call life.

Jason glanced at me from the corner of his eye, but I just kept looking forward like a statue. Jason sighed in defeat and started driving. I turned my head to look out the window.

The darkness was slowly turning to light, the eerie trees were becoming slightly brighter, and the wind was calming to a soft breeze.

None of that changed how I was. I was shell nothing more. I wanted to hate the world for being so bright when I was in such a dark place, but I couldn't hate it. I just can't hate. I can't love and I can't hate. I have no emotions whatsoever.

"Aren't you going to ask why I happened to be at the bridge?" He asked trying to sound casual, but the desperation was clear in his voice.

I didn't say anything. I didn't care. Maybe things would've turned out better if he hadn't been there. No, things would've been better if he hadn't been there.

"Well, I was dropping Austin off at his house. His house is across the bridge in an extremely bad part of town. We talked things out and decided to become friends again." He said with a hint of a smile.

I know he is happy about recoinciling with his best friend, but right this moment I don't care. It's good they have each other, but I lost the one thing I cared about the most in this entire f*cking hell called earth. I don't feel anymore. I don't think anymore. I'm just here. Hopefully that won't be true for long....