Matches ♕ Bughead

♕ | Chapter Thirty-Two

chapter thirty-two: we're all crazy 

♕ betty♕

*50 votes until next chapter*

EVERYTHING inside me, all my thoughts, feelings and even my breathing freezes. I slump against the wall next to my window, my eyes wide and my body paralyzed. I've experienced fear before, but nothing like this. I've never been struck with fear so real, so raw that I freeze helplessly. 

I curl up next to the window, not daring to look out it again. I feel my heart beat in my throat, my head starting to pound and my vision start to blur. It's only then do I realize I'm still not breathing. For a second I believe I've forgotten how to. 

With my hands clenched in fists, I allow the pain of my nails ripping through the flesh of my palm to distract me enough so I can clear my mind. I force myself to breathe again, force myself out of this paralyzed state. For some reason I take Ms.Grundy's car as a threat. 

Here I am, sitting in my house while my whole family sleeps knowing that a very unpredictable, presumably furious lunatic woman sits outside my house. My mother was the person to kick her out of Riverdale, force her out of her job. I was in on it too, as I helped uncover the truth between the affair her and Archie had, even if I didn't mean to. I was just trying to be Archie's friend, and now that small little action, that event in the music room so many weeks ago has come back to haunt me. 

I can't help but feel threatened, fear that she plans to cause harm upon my family. There is absolutely no reason she should be back in Riverdale, no reason she should be parked outside my house. 

This fear that I have for my family shifts me into pure survival mode, adrenaline taking over. With this I find the strength to crawl towards my bed, snatching my phone from my pillow. With trembling hands I force my fingers to search my contact list, selecting the only person I wish to speak to right now. 

I hold the phone up to my ear, leaning back beside the window so I am out of view from the unknown that lurks outside my window. I wait for the tedious ringing to stop, wait for Jughead's voice to sound instead. 

"It's Jughead, please don't leave a message." 

My heart drops at the sound of his voicemail, all my hopes of calming myself down and figuring things out draining in a split second. I try and call him again, but his voicemail is the only sound that I can appear to get from him. 

Not knowing what else to do, I shoot him a burst of texts written in all caps, urging him to call me back. Deep down I know there's someone less that thirty feet from where I sit now that could help me, but I can't find the courage to reach out to him after all this time of hating him. 

I know it's pathetic, that this childish grudge I have against him is stupid, but I know I deserve better. Archie always expected that whatever he did wasn't going to hurt me, that I would always go running back to him like I would when we were kids. But we're not kids anymore, and if I run back to him now then he'll win once again. I'm tired of Archie winning. God only knows I deserve some happiness too.