Langst One-Shots

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¡¡Contains Self-Harm/Mentions of Suicide/Season 4 Spoilers for the 1st episode¡¡

-Lance's POV-

I clutched Blue's seat tighter, sobbing into the slick material. Gentle tremors rippled through the air, Blue's soft reminder to breathe.

"I messed up."

I screwed my eyes shut, trying to block off the impossible number of tears that were  built up in my eyes. "I messed up so badly that Keith left." I wrapped my arms around myself, shivering as tears broke free from my makeshift dam, spilling down my cheeks. "I'm such a screwup." I blocked all everything out, the blood roaring in my ears drowning the world out. I curled into a ball as every insecurity I've ever had came rushing to the surface.

"I just want you to come home."
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-Keith's POV-

"Keith." Shiro's voice was strong over the hologram, "We need to talk." I sighed, glancing at the clock that hung on the wall. "I have training, but fine." I gestured at him to continue. "We're all happy that you've chosen to continue your Blade training," Shiro took a deep breath,

"But you may want to consider coming back."

I narrowed my eyes, muscles tensing. "Seriously?!" I growled, "I've finally found a place where I belong, and you want me to leave it all? For what?" Shiro looked me in the eyes, uncertainty flitting across his face, an unusual sight in itself. "We miss you, and the team needs you." I ran a hand through my hair angrily. "So what? You have 5 Paladins for 5 Lions. A perfect number, and I'm not just going to leave the Blade because you're all homesick!" I yelled, anger rushing through my veins. Shiro flinched, and I leaned forwards to end the call, when Shiro's soft voice trickled into my ear. "Please, Keith." His voice was soft, "Just hear me out." The amount of desperation in his voice made me freeze. "Look, I'm sorry that Pidge, Hunk, Allura, and you are all 'saddened by my absence'," I sighed, "But you're just going to have to figure it out." Shiro shook his head, exhaustion present in his features. "No," He said,

"We're not the ones you should be worried about."
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-Lance's POV-

I stared into the inky silence, the darkness eating away at my brain. Keith left before I had a chance to tell him, to confess. I shakily stood up, dragging my sleeve across my face, erasing the tear tracks that lay as evidence on my face. I took a deep breath, plastering a smile on my face and a spark in my gaze. I flew down Blue's ramp, skidding into the kitchen where the others looked up in surprise. "Hey guys." I panted, "What's up?" Pidge sighed, "Technically space is-" I raised a hand, "Nevermind. Don't answer that." I said, sliding into a chair. Shiro eyed me strangely, gaze searching my face. I frowned, raising an eyebrow.

"Can't keep your eyes off me, Shiro?"

I laughed, Shiro startling and looking away. "Just kidding, just kidding." I said, turning my attention to the table. Dinner was silent, and I excused myself early, closing myself in my room. "Stupid." I muttered, sliding down the door, burying my face in my knees. "Stupid, stupid, stupid!" I roughly ran a hand through my hair, tugging harshly. "I'm so stupid! 'Can't keep your eyes off me Shiro?' What was I thinking?!" I locked my gaze on to the opposite wall.

"You've f*cked me up, Keith Kogane."
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-Keith's POV-

I exited the small pod, nostalgia hitting me in waves as I stepped into the control room hangar. "So," I said, walking towards Shiro, "You've got some explaining to do." Shiro sighed, running a hand through his short hair. "I don't know how to explain it." He said frustrated, "I'll just have to show you." He took off town the hall, and I trailed after him. We passed by the kitchen, Pidge and Hunk giving me sad ghosting smiles as we trekked by.

"What did you mean by 'Lance stopped functioning'?"

I asked Shiro, shifting my bag onto my opposite shoulder. "Lance just kind of.....stopped working after you left." Shiro began, coming to a halt in front of the training room, "He only has 2 modes now." I looked through the window, eyes widening as I saw Lance take down over 20 gladiator bots. "Training," Shiro sighed sadly, "Or not." I shot him a glance, a scowl appearing on my face. "So he likes to train," I stared, "So what?" Shiro shook his head. "Just watch." I reluctantly turned back to Lance. He trained and trained, kept going and going until he was damp with sweat and a sea of black and blue. He trailed out of the training area without a sound, and I silently followed him, Shiro walking ahead. "Lance," Shiro asked gently, "Dinner's in 5 minutes." Lance looked at him tiredly.

"I'm good."

He whispered, and shut the door to his room, sealing himself inside. My heart sent off a dull ache at the sight. "He's been locking himself in his room  ever since you left." Shiro's gaze slid to me, "He's been distancing himself from all of us, and he rarely ever eats or sleeps." My eyes narrowed. "We don't know why, but he's completely torn apart. I know you have to get back to the Blade, but could you at least talk to him, see what's wrong?" I nodded and approached the door. "Lance?" I asked softly, Shiro disappearing down the corridor, "It's me, Keith." There was a pause, and the door slowly opened.

"What do you want, Mullet?"

Lance asked quietly. I cringed as I saw how tired he looked. "Just visiting," I answered, "And I was wondering if I could come in." Lance hesitated before opening they door, and I slowly walked into his room. Lance's walls were a plain blue, and his shelves and desk were surprisingly clean. Reminders and knick-knacks from past missions we had gone on lined the wooden beams on the wall, and his bed was neatly made. "Welcome to my room." Lance gestured to the space behind him. I quickly glanced at him, noticing that his gaze was directed at the floor. "Are you okay?" I asked, flinching when I sounded how cheesy it sounded.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

Lance sighed, looking at me, "Why?" I shrugged. "Dunno." Something was clearly wrong, and I wasn't going to move an inch until I had the answer balancing nicely on the edge of my blade. "How have things been here?" I questioned, curious to how he would respond. "Great." Lance replied, "Smooth as ever." I narrowed my eyes as the lies flowed flawlessly out if his mouth.

"I know they aren't."

I crossed my arms, "So tell me, what's wrong?" Lance shifted uncomfortably. "Was it my fault that you left?" Lance's question caught me offguard. "Was it something I did? I mean, not just me, but did I do something? Can I fix it?" Lance's voice was shaky. "I mean, I know you're not coming back, you're going back to the Blade, but if there's something I can fix, I will, so I don't drive anyone else away." I was frozen, his words processing in my head.

"Of course not, you idiot."

I breathed, "I left because of me." Lance shivered. "Right." I moved towards him, discarding my duffel bag on the cold metal floor. "Have you been blaming yourself for me leaving?" The words were heavy. "Yes." Lance's voice was shaky, "Because I miss your stupid mullet, your stupid smile, your stupid laugh, your stupid temper, I miss you, you stupid idiot." Lance looked down at his hands,

"I love you and I just want you to come home."