Soul Notes

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Gracias for 19K+ Reads

•Contains mentions of self-harm/suicide, please read responsibly•

-Lance's POV-

Blood.

Blood was something that we as people take to lightly. You never really knew how much blood was contained in a human until it poured out of your veins, staining water pink. I laid in the bathtub, shivering as my damp clothes clung to my body. I raised my arms up slowly, water mixing with blood and swirling together in the tub. "I'm sorry." I whispered, staring at my slit wrists. "I'm so, so sorry." My world began to dissolve into black, turning grainy around the edges.

"I hope you find them."

I mumbled, slumping as my veins emptied themselves of the very substance that was needed for me to breathe, to live.

"Find.........them."
________________
-Keith's POV-

My entire world came to a halt when Shiro broke down the bathroom door to reveal a bloody Lance in the bathtub, pink water submerging the lower half of his body.

My mind stopped functioning when we held the memorial service, shooting Lance's body out of the airlock, his soul becoming one with the stars.

My body stopped living when I realized that Lance was never coming back. I would never see his smile, never hear his laugh.

"Keith!" Pidge's sharp voice cut through my thoughts, "Hunk found something." I slowly forced myself to my feet, wincing as the dull ache in my chest resurfaced. "I-I was looking in the cabinents for some flour, when I-I found this." Hunk's voice trembled just as violently as his hands. "It's a note from Lance." I froze. "He left one for each of us." I stared at him blankly.

"We just have to find them."
_________
-Keith's POV-

Hunk found his note in a place only he would look. Pidge found hers days later, lodged inbetween two power cables in the Castle's mainframe. Coran discovered his in his workshop, buried underneath Altean books. Allura's appeared on her shelf of Altean makeup. Shiro discovered his tucked away in Black, which was a mystery in itself, since Lance shouldn't have been able to get inside Black in the first place.

I had yet to find mine.

Red eyes and silent days were normal now, no Cuban teen there to crack a joke or give a smile. We had undervalued Lance, only realizing just how precious he was after he was gone. I sat down heavily on my bed, door locked and ceiling dark.

"How could you leave me?"

I whispered, guilt crushing me alive. I stumbled towards my dresser drawers, pulling out one of my many knives. The world was consumed by darkness. Lance, my Lance, was gone.

And he wasn't coming back.

I shakily raised the knife to my arm, freezing as I noticed the paper taped around the sharp edge of the blade. DON'T DO IT, it read, bold letters stark against the white background. I sat heavily on my bed, tears welling in my eyes. "Lance, you idiot." I whispered, tears sliding down my cheeks, "You monumental idiot." I slowly grasped the paper in one hand and gently pulled, shaking hands slowly unfolding the paper my breath catching in my chest as I gazed upon Lance's words. His last words. I roughly wiped my eyes with gloved hands and began to read.

Keith,

If you're reading this, I'm probably dead. I can't say I'm sad or surprised, considering that was my intention. I'm just not meant for this world, never have been. I've been carrying this weight on my shoulders, far too many insecurities and doubts for any one man to handle. I guess when we became Paladins, the weight doubled, and I began to shoulder the burden of the entire universe upon myself as well. I don't want ANY of you to blame yourselves, especially you. Could you please make sure Pidge sleeps, Hunk eats, Allura smiles, Shiro relaxes, Coran laughs, and you, you have to let me go. I want you to be happy, to find that someone that makes the whole world light up in a symphony of colors. One last thing before I go. I was the right leg of Voltron, I held everyone up along with Hunk. But who held me up? No one. I'm not angry, sad, or upset, but when you get a new Blue Paladin, could you please make sure that you're always there for them, lifting them up as they do you? Thanks, it would mean the world. And Mullet?

I love you.

- Lance McClain, Ex-Paladin of Voltron

The paper creased under my fingers, tears splattering on the fragile last declaration of Lance McClain. "Lance, you stupid goofball." I sobbed, hugging the letter to my chest,

"You were the person who lit up my world."

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