Pharaoh's Queen {HIATUS}

64: " The Burden of Secrets "

Kiya'a P.O.V

Every morning the same thing happened. She would be present at my door with my hot liquid saviour and she would unknowingly make a bitter remark and it would somehow spark up a conversation. Most times she was always in her feelings, feelings I thought she never had. She was growing a new personality even though some of the original attitude looks like it made a permanent mark on her. I cannot believe how close we are at this moment and it scares me every time because I never thought I would be talking to her in such a comfortable manner and she would be helping me out. Even though we would talk like this she still disappears during the rest of the day and I barely see her until nightfall. I never asked about it as she was a grown woman and plus it is none of my business what she does or where she goes.

Zahra's P.O.V

I was conflicted and I did not know what to do. He was down there locked up and I couldn't even get to see him. The horrible memories came back. I leaned against the wall and covered my face with my hands. I could not face him, I could not face him any at all. He was a part of what I did in the past. Even though the past was not so long ago he will still be a remembrance of the horrible thing I did or the horrible things I almost made happen. I tapped my fingers against the wall in frustration, I cannot ask Khai if I could go down there because that would raise suspicions plus that would take too long considering I have no idea when he will be back. It is heavily guarded and I cannot get down there without permission. I do not even know if he is still... I shook my head from the thought. Khai would never do that, he would want to find out all the important details and I now he will never give any information , it is his training. 

I needed to stop stressing myself. I could leave him here along with everything I did. No matter how sorry I am if anyone finds out I will not step out alive, Khai will have my head on stick for public display. My parents would become childless immediately. I would never even have a chance to explain myself.

I could never plead my case, there is no way to give a suitable reason why I did what I did" I almost killed her but I changed. Forgive me?" That would never work! I was jealous plain and simple.

I could not take the fall for this! I could not manage the pressure. He was just following orders, my orders.

"But he was stupid , he got caught," I mumbled. " Zahra stop it!" I shook my head. " You never leave a man behind...but... the consequences...they out weigh the truth. No good will come of this,the name truth might kill us both."

Change was not to be this critical. Everything changes when your head could be under an axe. I placed my shaking my hands around my neck as images of my execution played vividly in my mind. If I get it off my chest the shadow of death follows me , I can feel it just thinking about it. Khai has a horrible temper , he cares for her way too much to listen to anything I would say . I could beg and plead and it would have no effect, I would just be another criminal begging for mercy. I cannot get him out without revealing the truth, the best way is the let it be, it will save both of us.

I cannot risk all that hard work , all trust will be thrown out the window and all efforts would be futile. As much as that is true it still haunts me,it never goes away. I spent my days sitting on the ground in the musty halls nearest to where the prison might be. That is the closest I could go without causing trouble. Father would be upset with me if he found out, he would have no problem disowning me now. Mother, on the other hand, only cares that I did not do the job properly. I sighed in frustration. I hated this situation, the internal battle between what is right and what is wrong. Maybe it
is the best for both sides if the truth was not told. I closed my eyes as I slid down the wall. I brought my legs up to my chest and rested my head on my knees.

This was truly a test. I wonder what the Gods want me to prove? I do not know how long I can take this. You just want to get away from it all, I wish I could forget . I wish it could be erased, that one mess and that I created. If it disappeared maybe then I could move on and I would stop remembering and will not come back here to spend my time weighing options that concerns life and death.

I should just let it remain and stir up anything. What they do not know will not harm them so it is better this way... for both of us.