Always Been You

Forty four

Motherly

No matter how would I deny my feelings for him,  it's all keep coming back to me.   How one can avoid another if you evolve in the same place.

Good thing when we went back in the Philippines, he is no longer around. I don't want to know his whereabouts. But it seems like faith is having fun at me.

Kusang dumarating ang mga impormasyon na may kinalaman sa kanya.  He is that famous after all. Palagi siyang pinag uusapan sa buong hospital. And I also know from them how desperate that woman for claiming him as his fiance.

But still, jealousy is eating me alive! It's been a month already since that incident.

Dra. Arabella Sandoval
Calling

Nakatingin ako sa aking phone. It keeps on ringing.
I picked it up and pressed the answer key. "Hello?" with a hesitate voice I made to finally speak. Puno ng bara ang lalamunan ko sa di mawaring emosyon.

"Doctora Laurice, iha, can I have lunch with you later?" nanantiya ang boses niya but her cheerfulness is so likely of her still. Hindi yun madaling maihiwalay sa pagkatao ng butihing doctora.

"S-sige po." I was left with full of questions. Why did she all of a sudden invited me out? But the dainty surroundings of my clinic cannot provide me answer I needed right now. Katahimikan ang namayani sa loob ng silid. A soft music from mini stereo soothes my troubled mind.

We eat at the restaurant nearby.  Sinundo niya ako. Hindi siya pumayag na dalhin ko ang kotse kasi ibabalik naman daw niya ako sa hospital. I told her I have scheduled operation late afternoon.

"so how are you and Matthew?" she voiced out while looking at her food.  The food is already prepared soon as we arrive the place.

Hindi ako nakasagot. "So totoo nga na may hindi kayo pinagkakaunawaan." nanlaki ang mga mata kong nakatingin sa kanya. All this time pala ay alam niya?  "I have my ways to know everything doctora." sabi pa niya sa akin.

"just call me Laurice na lang po.  No need for addressing me as doctora." o said as a matter of fact.  naaasiwa kasi ako sa tawagan niya.

"well would it better also if you call me Tita or mommy instead?" her expression,  hopeful. But her being cheerful surfaced.

"Then I will settle calling you Tita po"
I smiled dahil sa hindi ko maitago ang amusement ko sa kanya.

"oh I won't mind. Really." she quickly reply sabay haplos ng mga kamay ko.

Silence consumed our individual thoughts. I thanked the food took away awkwardness that building up. "How are you doing iha?" she asked me politely.

I took a bite before giving her my answer. "I'm fine Tita. We just attended the conference at Singapore last week. I mean me and Kaye. Yeah" she looked at me in the duration of our talk. Yun ata ang namana ni Matthew sa kanya.

"I purposely invited you to talk about Matthew." umayos siya ng upon at nagpatuloy. "you see,  he underwent depression when you left him. He admitted for the wrong impression being caught with a woman. I don't want to know what happened back then. But he drowned himself being alcoholic and lifeless. Laman siya ng bar at babae ang sentro ng buhay niya." dumaan nag malungkot na ekspresyon sa maganda niyang mukha. Hindi ko magawang magsalita. Nakikinig lang ako sa maari pa niyang sabihin.

"but when you came and back into each other again,  naging maayos ulit ang buhay niya. I can see him full of life. He went to an isolated island to undergo research development for three months.  There's no means of communication kasi walang tower doon.  Sinadya yun. The only communication facility is for the use of the research center only." unti-unting natunaw nag mga pangamba ko.

"Kaya nakausap ko siya kasikat ako yung tumawag sa center. And you know what he said to me? That I should tell you the truth between him and Micaela. She is obsessed with my son. Her desperate move is claiming my son as her fiancee." hindi ko namalayan tumulo na pala ang mga luha ko. It overflows as her revelation came in.

"Laurice don't think negative about my son. I know how much he loves you. Please hold on. Micaela will be dealt with para matigil na ang kabaliwan niya. Huwag kang mag akala." napahagulgol na ako ng tuluyan. I'm not prepared either leaving Matthew for the rest of my life. Mahal na mahal kita siya. What we have is long overdue.

"he said,  he loves you so much. And that you take care always until he comes back. He will be the one to take care of you soon as he gets home." mas lalo pang lumakas ang pag-iyak ko. Oh my God!

She hugged me and continued caressing my back till I get back my composure. All this time I missed motherly warmth and care. At nakuha ko yun kay Tita Arabella.