Playing With Fire || d.h

14. T is for Trauma

Trigger warning: Reference to rape at end

Your POV

The five of us walk up the winding driveway, filled with expensive cars and people who make more money in a month than I do in a year. I'm in awe as I see the mansion coming up, an ultramodern house with light pouring from the completely glass walls and reflecting off a beautiful infinity pool. Even in my outfit, I don't know if I've ever felt more out of place.

"Do you think I'm the only one here who's not famous in one way or another?" I whisper to Dodie.

"Oh, shut up," she replies. "I don't know what your sub count is, but even if it's not on the high side, those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." I give her a shocked look, surprised at the wisdom that's just come from her, but she only gives me a sideways smirk.

We walk through the contemporary wood doors, and are immediately greeted by a beautiful butler dressed in a suit more expensive than my apartment, holding out a mirrored tray covered with crystal glasses filled with bubbly champagne. PJ grabs two glasses from the tray, handing one to me.

"Oh, um, thanks," I murmur to both PJ and the butler, and silently scold myself as it comes out more as an awkward mumble than a thank you. I take a sip of the sparkly drink, and almost feel calmed by the creamy, soft, mellow liquid.

"I feel so bougie right now," I say to Dodie, who chuckles and nods in agreement, sipping from her glass with her pinky stuck out in mock grandeur.

PJ, Dodie and I walk aimlessly around the party, PJ greeting random people and introducing them to me, and I'm somehow able to not majorly embarrass myself within the first thirty minutes. After finishing my champagne, I awkwardly look around, wondering where to put my glass, but luckily PJ sees my struggle, takes the glass out of my hand, and places it on a random table.

"That works," I chuckle as he smirks at me.

"If it isn't mister PJ!" I hear a voice calling from in front of us, and see none other than Pewdiepie.

"Hey, man!" PJ steps toward Felix, and wraps him in a hug. "Long time, no see!"

"Yeah, I couldn't agree more!" Even with my attempt at trying to shrink behind PJ, Felix notices me. "And who is this?"

"This is (Y/n), my girlfriend," PJ explains. Him introducing me as his girlfriend for the first time causes an uncomfortably unfamiliar feeling to flood through me, and I almost physically shiver.

"Nice to meet you," He says, holding his hand out to me. I awkwardly shake it, hoping he doesn't notice how clammy my palms are.

"You, too," I smile shyly at him. Luckily, he seems to almost forget I'm there, as he and PJ converse together about something or other, and I stand next to PJ like a silent accessory. That is, until Dodie elbows me and whispers in my ear.

"I need to use the toilet, can you come with me?" She asks. I turn to PJ, but he's completely absorbed in a discussion with Felix and some other wealthy-looking man I don't recognize. I nod at Dodie, who grabs my arm, and starts leading me through the maze of a crowd.

"I don't actually need to pee, I was just extremely bored and wasn't about to leave you in that situation." To be honest, I wasn't really feeling bored or anything, as I was just appreciative of being able to stand there and not have to talk to anyone. However, I realize that's the exact thing I wanted to stop doing.

I grin at Dodie. "Thanks, I was getting a little bored, too. Do you think they have any more of that champagne?"

Dodie laughs. "You read my mind."