After Shift - Chicago Fire Fanfiction

38.) He's Going to Break

"How do you go about planning your son's funeral when you should be planning his 17th birthday?" Kelly asked Matt, whose family hadn't left the Severide house since everything happened two days ago.

"I don't know, Kel. I can't imagine what I would be doing if this had happened to Ella or Spencer. Anything you need, I'm right here." Matt told him, resting his hand on his friend's shoulder, which shook with sobs.

Upstairs, Stella was staring blankly at the wall as she sat on the edge of her bed. Gabby sat with her, doing her best to comfort her despite having no idea how.

"You'll get through this." Gabby assured her, holding her hand and giving her a forced smile.

"I just, I keep thinking he's at a friend's house or something and he's coming home soon. But he's not. He never is." Stella said. "Even in a house full of 4 other kids, it still feels so empty without him."

"I can't imagine how this feels."

Outside, the other kids were sitting on the back porch together, CJ refusing to be near anyone.

"I miss him, too, CJ." Evan told the boy, sitting on the step beside him and wrapping his arm around his shoulders.

"Go away! He was my favorite brother, not you! You'll never replace him!" CJ yelled, getting up and storming inside, going to his room.

Evan sighed and buried his head in his hands, tears falling freely.

"He doesn't mean it." Riley said, sitting beside her brother and resting her arm on his shoulder.

"I'm not crying over what our little brother said." He chuckled throwing sobs. "I'm crying because I miss Andy and he's never coming back. I just, I miss him. I pass his room in the morning and I expect him to walk out of that closed door and say it was all a sick joke."

"That's not going to happen, Ev." Riley said sadly, leaning her head on his shoulder. "I wish it would though."

Jack suddenly appeared around the house, sweaty and gross from football practice. "Hey guys." He said, sitting on the step in front of them.

"How was practice?" Evan asked, trying to control his crying.

"Good. We're doing a tribute to Andy before the game tomorrow night. I guess I'm starting now since he can't."

"You're really playing tomorrow?" Riley asked.

"What else am I going to do? I can't sit around and mope like you guys can. I just can't. I have to keep moving and this is how I'm going to get through it! If you guys want to sit around and cry and mourn him, great. Do your thing. I don't grieve that way though! God, you know what? I'm going for a run." He said, storming off back around the house.

"We're 0 for 2 with our brothers today." Evan chuckled.

"It hasn't hit him yet that Andrew's really dead. I don't know when it's going to hit him, but when it does, he's going to break." Riley said, worried for her brother.