Supernatural Imagines & Preferences ^Completed^

Okay (Misha×FTM!Son!Reader)

   TRIGGER WARNING!!!: Dysphoria and gross puberty talk  are mentioned and described in great fuckin detail so. For those of you that don't know FTM stands for Female To Male and it's a term that transgender people use so yeah. Also (Y/F/N) is gonna stand for 'Your Former Name', so the name before you transitioned. 

   I want to let you know that I know that dysphoria is different for everyone. This is gonna be based off of my dysphoria, but it's not gonna be exactly what I went through because I'm non binary, while the character in the story is a trans guy. Ily guys lots - Emma

   Going to set with your dad was always the highlight of your year. It was always really hard without your dad around, knowing that your mom had most of her attention on Maison and West. Obviously, it didn't bother you, but it was nice to be the only child again. You and your dad had been close ever since you were little, you having liked sports and superheroes as much as the next little boy, despite being a girl. The kids at school always found it weird, how you acted like a boy and dressed in blues and reds, jeans and t-shirts, while all the other girls wore pinks and purples, skirts and blouses. They all liked princesses and fairy tales, something you weren't particularly interested in. You, like your family, just thought it was normal, something most kids would go through and eventually grow out of. 

   But as you got older, you felt more and more out of the ordinary. Your hair would grow longer, making you look more feminine, and you hated it. It made you feel uncomfortable, vulnerable, so you decided to always wear it up. You knew you could've just asked your parents to cut it short, but you felt like you weren't allowed to. You also were expected to wear more feminine clothes, which made you feel exposed. You never realized how much you hated the thought of femininity until you hit puberty. When you first got your period, you felt as if your life was ruined. And when you started growing boobs, you had a mental breakdown just thinking about it. You hated the thought that you were growing into a women, you couldn't wrap your head around why you were like this. 

   Eventually, you found the term 'Transgender'. You found similarities in your actions and feelings with people who identified as the opposite gender than when they were born. As you learned more and more about being transgender, you identified with it more and more, and it oddly gave you closure and calmed you about everything that once bothered the shit out of you. At first, you had just came out to your friends, then your teachers, and then your guidance counselor. Your guidance counselor had sent a letter to all of the teachers, most of them had already knew, but it was hardest around your family. Your family didn't know and were still calling you by your "old" name, (Y/F/N). It bothered you, but it was better than admitting to your family how you really felt. 

   To help with the dysphoria, you started wrapping your chest with ace bandages. You knew it wasn't safe, but it got rid of some of the dysphoric thoughts you had so you kept doing it. Your mom didn't know, your dad didn't know, the rest of the cast and crew didn't know, only you and a few friends did. Up until now. 

   Jensen had walked into your dad's trailer when you were in there binding. He stopped dead in his tracks, stammering as you continued to wrap yourself with the ace bandage, knowing that he was behind you. Tears welled up in your eyes as you slipped on your shirt and walked over to him. 

   "Don't tell Dad," you said quietly as he wrapped you into a hug. "Please, J. Don't tell 'im." He shook his head and kissed the top of yours. 

   "I won't," he said as he pulled away. "But you have to tell him at some point, (Y/F/N)." You visibly cringed at the name he called you and he noticed. "Wh-what's the matter?"

   "Can you call me something else? Like, most of my friends call me (Y/N)." Jensen furrowed his eyebrows and nodded, looking down at his hands and cracking his knuckles. 

   "Okay...(Y/N)." You knew that it was hard for him to do it, but you were grateful to him for trying. You smiled at him, mouthing 'thank you' and walked out to go meet your dad on set. Jensen followed, having to film a scene also. You walked in with Jensen and your dad saw you and smiled. He came over to you, giving you a hug and kissing you on the head. 

   "How's my girl doing," he asked. Your heart clenched at that word. That word that you didn't hate but didn't love. That word that broke you to a million pieces, but you had to piece yourself together quickly. 

   "I-I'm good," you answered reluctantly. Your dad smiled at you again as he walked off to go film his scene with  Alex. Jensen looked at you apologetically before sitting down in a chair that was behind the camera, inviting you to sit in one next to him. The scene was very heartfelt and you could tell that most of the crew was trying not to burst into tears, especially your dad. Seeing him this way always reminded you of how sentimental he was, how caring and genuine. Maybe he would be okay with it, with your decisions. Either way, they're your decisions and there was no way that he would be mad or unaccepting. 

   The day went by quick after that, and you couldn't remember much of anything because your mind was consumed with the thought of telling your dad you were transgender. You were in his trailer, waiting for him to pack up his things and change out of his Castiel clothes, when you decided that you would tell him. Tell him now, (Y/N), you said to yourself. If you don't tell him now, you never will. You sighed and you felt your voice get caught in your throat as you spoke. 

   "D-dad?" Your dad's head snapped up as he heard the reluctance in your voice, immediately thinking the worst. 

   "Sweetheart, what's wrong," your dad asked as he once overed you, checking to see if you had any exposed wounds. 

   "I-I have something to tell you." He nodded as he listened. "I-I don't like being called, or even really identify as a girl. I ne-never really did. What I'm trying to say is that Dad, I-I'm a boy." You felt like a huge weight was lifted off your chest as you came out to him. He raised his eyebrows in shock and looked down at the floor. After a few moments, your dad looked up into your eyes and spoke the one word that you had hoped for your entire life.

   "Okay," he whispered as you smiled, tears welling up in your eyes. You ran up to him and wrapped him in a bone crushing hug, to which he returned. You felt his tears fall on your shoulder, soaking through your shirt. Your dad pulled away, wiping to tears from his face and looking at you seriously. "So, what do I call you now?"

   "(Y/N)," you said almost automatically. "My friends already call me that..." He nodded and smiled at you. 

   "I like that name." You felt excitement course through your body as you relished in the support that your father was giving off.

   "Thank you," you said as you and your dad left the trailer, locking it behind you. 

   "You don't have to thank me, (Y/N). If I didn't accept you, I wouldn't be a good parent." You nodded your head along with him, daydreaming about how much easier it would be able to tell your mom.